Women are girly. Again.
Don't believe me? The proof is in the blogosphere: Women who blog about cupcakes! Women who blog (okay, rant) about gardening, Hello Kitty, and knitting! Even BUST magazine is sponsoring a Craft Fair in NYC. Women who blog about cats! And then there are cats who blog, but let's not get into that just now. Don't get me wrong, these are all lovely blogs, smart and entertaining. And some blogs, like the wonderful Jezebel, keep us on our toes pointing out what a long way we haven't come, baby (like in this piece on how female superheroes are sexualized). But.. seriously... cupcakes?
What happened to our hard-won bad-assery? All those years of being suffragettes, bra-burners, free love artists, corporate queen bees, supermoms and women-who-wanted-and-got-it all? I mean, hadn't we arrived and become a force to be reckoned with? Okay, maybe that model of a superwoman that rose to prominence in the 1980s was a myth (think Sigourney Weaver's Wall Street ball-breaker in Working Girl). Maybe "having it all" was a silly fantasy that ultimately made women feel exhausted and inferior. Maybe we just wanted to sit on our asses and knit and eat cupcakes in our Hello Kitty jammies.
And now that so many women have seemingly retreated from our reign of awesomeness to immerse themselves in the feminine past-times of yesteryear, it does indeed appear that we've lost sight of what it means to be a badass, strong, tough woman. Not that our pioneering foremothers were not bad-ass... have you seen Meek's Cutoff?
Maybe it's the "new" (crappy) economy, or our fear of the imminent zombie-vampire-Tea Partier apocalypse, or the realization that teaching our kids self-reliance instead of whiny entitlement really is the best approach to parenting, but there's so much emphasis on, well, ultra-femme domestic activity these days. This weird retro world of cooking, heirloom tomatoes and Jane Austen is starting to feel a bit smug and smothering. Where's the fun?
Oh, we still drink: why, we're doyennes of vintage cocktails. We still go dancing: why, we take pole-dancing classes from burlesque starlets now. But somehow we've lost that righteous indignation born of centuries of oppression. And take it from me, ladies, we're not fully equal yet. But we have become complacent. We're not tough anymore; we're soft (Pilates and yoga classes notwithstanding).
Maybe being called "tough" makes some women uncomfortable (sorta like being called a "bitch," right?). Well, too bad! There are tough times ahead, and we need to be tough bitches to face them. Growing vegetables is useful; but so is learning how to shoot a gun, hot-wire a car, and manipulate our way into a bomb shelter.
Remember our tough gal role models? They were strong, sexy, and took no crap. They wore leather and sang rock and roll. Chrissie Hynde, Joan Jett, Grace Jones, Courtney Love. They kicked ass in the movies: Sigourney Weaver in Alien, Sally Field in Norma Rae, Meryl Streep in Silkwood, Julia Roberts in Erin Brockovich. (See, what's cool is, those last two films were based on real women.) They battled monsters on TV: Xena: Warrior Princess and Buffy the Vampire Slayer.
Lately women on TV seem to be all about glamor and acquisition: cougars, not tigresses. Mad Men, bless its arty vintage soul, retreads our humiliating recent past (though 1967 approaches, and things are heating up). And really, glamor has limited practical value; do you want to be left behind when the revolution comes, back to the wall, crippled by your stilettos? Hell, no; you want to be on the run with a sackful of penicillin, Kruggerands and organic chocolate bars.
Thankfully, television has some new tough gal role models. There's Jemma (Katey Sagal) from Sons of Anarchy, the matriarch of a clan of California bikers, who keeps the peace with an iron hand and a heart of chrome. A phenomenal actress, Sagal's success after 50 belies the Hollywood myths about middle-aged actresses.
Then there's Mireille Enos, star of the new AMC series The Killing (based on a successful Swedish series of the same name). With her slight frame, flame-colored hair and ivory skin, she seems frail and fey. But as Detective Sarah Linden, she exudes quiet courage, intelligence and no-nonsense grit.
And check out the lusty bunch of vamps and their foils on HBO's True Blood. Sookie Stackhouse may be a nubile blonde waitress, but she's tough as nails. Her troubled badass pal Tara is a force to be reckoned with, as is vamp-lesbian Pam. Actresses Anna Pacquin, Rutina Wesley and Kristin Bauer are but three standout performers in this show that portrays strong, tough women, which says a lot for a genre normally full of victims. Let's hope tough gals become a new trend.
As women, I wish we celebrate and congratulate these choices, not criticize each other simply because they choose to exercise options that we don't. Shame on us for this; maybe if we all tried something new, or took the time to look at things from soneone else's point-of-view, we'd actually make this a better world for all.
Have you ever seen Ducky DooLittle as Knockers the Clown? Round bottomed sex educator who plops down on a cake. How fun is that? And very bad ass. Or at least, icing assed.
Perhaps cupcakes are a gateway treat?
What's not a treat is realizing that so many feminist-identified people have zero sense of humor. But, that is a classic stereotype, isn't it? "This is a feminist bookstore! There IS no humor section!"
I was a jet engine mechanic during the Viet Nam era. And, I knit and baked and canned my way through that time because I ENJOYED it. I was a historian during Grenada and the first Gulf War. And, guess what...I knit my way through those times too. I knit in an aircraft hanger, sitting next to a C-141. I knit in the sand, and I knit while there were Communist demonstrations happening on the other side of a chain link fence.
Was I soft? I think not!
There are men that knit (Russel Crowe name one). Are they soft? No! My husband bakes cupcakes and wears a military uniform. Is he soft? I would say not!
Granted, these tough, kick-ass, fictional women that Peg mentioned are tough. But the real, flesh and blood women, Julia Roberts and Meryl Streep for instance, along with myriad other women that take the time to craft, using their hands to create rather than destroy, are just as tough.
Wake up Peg. We women do not have to prove our "tough". We just are.
as a mother of 3 wonderful kids, a boy and 2 girls, i want all of them to see their father and i as equally strong and independent. for me, saying i'm a feminist means i'm equal, and what i have and do, i work for.
i admire the cupcake baking, gardening, knitting women as much as the gonzo, gun toting, hot rod loving riot grrrls. i feel it's more a humanist issue to be dependent on other People rather than big chains and box stores; period.
as far as women in pop culture, while we may not all feel they're valid, unfourtunately they are. tv, movies, music and book are how people learn to relate to others when not exposed to those situations in real life. my simple solution however, is to ignore the antigrrrl media, change the channel, and do my very best to make sure my kids realize vapid is not a way of life.
Nice cupcake-baking video, by the way.
I would like to add, she is giving credence to FICTIONAL characters and comparing them to creative interesting valid real persona's. Her basic premise is NOT valid. Peg's view has alienated herself from the real world sisterhood of feminism by which definition is for equal opportunity. Equal Peg equal. Your premise does not even equate. As far as opportunity we have the opportunity to do as we real women please and embrace our fellow sisters choice.
I choose to grow a bounty in my garden. I choose to knit. I choose to bake cupcakes (I have even knitted cupcakes 2 at a time).
Peg, why have you chosen to debase the life choices of real women in the name of fictional criticism? Why would you uphold fiction over a tangible reality?
I believe in real world activities of real women. The true role models create the craft of life, not those who merely imitated so called art on the big screen or TV. Role models are real people not fictional characters. Good role models do not belittle they encourage. You belittle you are not a role model. You say the proof is in the blogosphere. Check your theorem Peg and leave the Gardeners, Bakers and Knitters out of your debunked theories. The bloggers you have declassified from feminism, they respond to posts. How about you to the 99.999%.
“In your skit Against your sisterhood who knit, Or useful make their fingers, I wonder if–deny it not–The habit of Lucretia Mott Within your memory lingers! “In retrospective vision bright, Can you recall dear Martha Wright Without her work or knitting? The needles flying in her hands, On washing rags or baby’s bands, Or other work as fitting? “I cannot think they thought the less, Or ceased the company to bless With conversation’s riches, Because they thus improved their time, And never deemed it was a crime To fill the hours with stitches. “They even used to preach and plan To spread the fashion, so that man Might have this satisfaction; Instead of idling as men do, With nervous meddling fingers too, Why not mate talk with action? “But as a daughter and a niece, I pride myself on every piece Of handiwork created; While reveling in social chat, Or listening to gossip flat, My gain is unabated. “That German emperor you scorn, Seems to my mind a monarch born, Worthy to lead a column; I’ll warrant he could talk and work, And, neither being used to shirk, Was rarely very solemn. “I could say more upon this head, But must, before I go to bed, Your idle precepts mocking, Get out my needle and my yarn And, caring not a single darn, Just finish up this stocking.”
Copied right from Peg’s blog bio:(edited for length)
Peg
• Gender:Female
• Industry: Education
About Me
I'm a small-scale professional gardener and lover of nature. I'm a film critic, freelance writer and academic who teaches media studies. I'm also a published poet and singer and collector of traditional songs. I enjoy life most of the time and am rarely bored. I'm into sacred sites and earth mysteries. I love visionaries and hate litterbugs.
Interests
•gardening, hiking, walking, cooking, animals, vintage clothing/fabrics, singing and collecting traditional songs, travelling, being outdoors
Favorite Movies
•Picnic at Hanging Rock, The Wicker Man, La Dolce Vita, Edward Scissorhands, Sideways, The Libertine, Casino Royale, The Devil's Rejects, The Shooting Party
Favorite Music
•psychedelic rock, wyrd folk, big band jazz, traditional Irish and Scottish
Favorite Books
•Possession, The Secret History, The Triumph of the Moon, Season of the Witch, Jane Eyre
AND from the article over at BUST : ETA (new finding):
And if none of that was enough for you, here is Peg's Linked In profile, in which she is clearly listed as both a BAKER AND A GARDENER!!!
Just had to share!
Oh, and by the way. I've also finished 4 Ironmans. So if you really want to have a who's tougher contest, Peg, I'm game.
But I am a grown woman and am not intimidated by you.