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Philip Goldberg

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You Know You Should Meditate, So Why Don't You?

Posted: 02/28/11 05:03 AM ET

Not very long ago, the only people who practiced meditation regularly were Hindus and Buddhists, mostly in ashrams and monasteries. Then, Westerners who were influenced by those traditions but did not adopt the religious labels took up meditation forms as spiritual practices. When scientific studies documented the benefits of meditation, it went secular: physicians recommended it to patients, corporations and hospitals created meditation rooms and psychologists prescribed it for anxiety and stress reduction. Then Christians and Jews adapted Eastern procedures -- replacing Sanskrit mantras with words and phrases from their own traditions, for instance -- and unlocked the vaults of their mystical past. Now, if you say you meditate for 20 minutes before breakfast every morning, no one will bat an eye. I assure you that in 1968, when I started meditating, people looked at me as though I was poking needles into a voodoo doll.

You would think that this stamp of approval would make meditating as common as stopping at Starbucks for a caffeine fix. Instead, for a great many people, it's more like cutting down on carbs: they know it would be good for them, but they don't get around to doing it.

Why don't they? There are many reasons, of course, but in my experience two stand out.

The most frequently mentioned excuse, predictably, is lack of time. Virtually everyone feels that he or she has too much to do and too little time to do it in. But isn't it interesting that we always find time for things we truly value, whether it's exercising or reading the Sunday paper or taking the kids to soccer practice? If you really valued a period of silent meditation, you'd find the time. If not an hour, then half an hour; if not half an hour, then 15 minutes, or 10. With a little spiritual time management, most people find they can free up time to nurture their souls.

The real problem with people who say they don't have time to meditate is that they have not come to see its value. Americans are pragmatic, bottom-line people. But we are also outwardly driven, deluded by the idea that fulfillment comes from what we do rather than what we are inside. So we think that ticking off items from our long to-do lists is more valuable than something like meditation. But there is a direct line from inner well-being to the quality and success of our actions. Meditation should not be considered an escape, but rather a way to enhance performance by reducing stress, quieting the mind and tapping into internal reservoirs of energy and creativity.

Consider Mahatma Gandhi, a rather busy fellow who was trying to drive a colonial power out of his homeland and keep Hindus and Muslims from slaughtering one another. At the start of one especially busy day, Gandhi said, "I have so much to accomplish today that I must meditate for two hours instead of one."

Meditate on that for a while.

The second reason people who want to meditate don't is: they don't know how. I can't count the number of times I've heard someone say, "I've tried to meditate, but it doesn't work for me" or, "I'm not good at it." When I ask if they've ever been taught how to meditate, the answer is usually no. For some reason, people think they ought to be able to pick it up on their own. Well, you can pick up computer programming or scuba diving on your own too, but if you want to do such things well and get the most out of them, it's a good idea to get some proper instruction.

And getting some haphazard directions in a self-help magazine or trying to remember a guided relaxation from a yoga class or a stress management seminar is not proper instruction. The problem with such cavalier approaches is that meditation is likely to be unsatisfying. Why? Because, having heard that meditation silences the mind, people try too hard to achieve that result, and that leads to strain. As a result, we find situations like this: someone suffers from anxiety; she decides to meditate to reduce that anxiety; but she hasn't been properly instructed, so she gets anxious about her meditation; she tries hard to get it right; it becomes an unpleasant chore; she concludes it doesn't work for her and gives it up.

The point is, an effective meditation practice should begin with proper instruction. Look for a form that that has an honorable history of proven use, is taught by a well-trained instructor, can be performed with ease on your own and that produces both immediate and long-term benefits.

There are other reasons why people don't meditate. One is, "Life is good, so I don't need it." That's like neglecting diet or exercise because you're not sick at the moment. Then there's the opposite: "I'm under too much stress now," to which the best response is, "Duh! What better reason to do it?" But shortage of time and lack of proper instruction are the main obstacles, and they're easy to overcome if, like Gandhi, you recognize the value of regular meditation. And that recognition comes over time. So, once you start, stick with it long enough to give peace a chance.

 
 
 

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Not very long ago, the only people who practiced meditation regularly were Hindus and Buddhists, mostly in ashrams and monasteries. Then, Westerners who were influenced by those traditions but did not...
Not very long ago, the only people who practiced meditation regularly were Hindus and Buddhists, mostly in ashrams and monasteries. Then, Westerners who were influenced by those traditions but did not...
 
 
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03:00 AM on 03/11/2011
Great article and as a meditation teacher myself I think you have it pretty accurate.

Lack of understanding of the real value/benefits --> a low priority --> can't afford it/no time in this ever busier world where our time is so precious.

Lack of knowledge of how --> experiences that are not understood --> a dropped or never started practice.

There is so much science out there, some excellent some poor, that it is no longer a matter of whether we should. It is now a matter of getting the message of why we should.
10:01 PM on 03/04/2011
I'm with Fred, no should. I think you have to take a good look at why you choose this. Meditation is a good way to train your brain to work in a more ordered fashion. But if you are looking for enlightenment, think again. There's no such thing. It never did matter how many chakras there were, or any of it. AS someone who's been doing this since 1970, there's only being a stronger and kinder person or there isn't. All this spiritual techno-babble doesn't help anyone.
05:07 PM on 03/09/2011
I am afraid I'd have to disagree with you there. But it is a question of faith, true.
02:04 PM on 03/10/2011
And, I might add, a question of experience... through gaining familiarity with Buddha's teachings on wisdom, the illusory interdependent nature of all phenomena, we can crash through umpteen mental barriers to find increasing levels of inner freedom. If we are meditating also on love, compassion and other so-called "method" practices taught by Buddha, we can increase all our good qualities infinitely. These two, wisdom and method, are like two wings that can fly us to enlightenment, our fulfilled spiritual potential. Just getting a taste of these two shows that there is more where that came from. I wrote a blog article along the lines of this subject here: http://bit.ly/fWqNIi
02:22 AM on 03/11/2011
It's a question of definition (and experience as you posted below). "Eastern" enlightenment has been so misunderstood that people often think it is about magic and levitation rather than a series of qualities such as "equanimity in the face of gains and losses (unflappable)".
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Fred LaMotte
I am nobody. How dare you give me a micro-bio.
07:01 AM on 03/04/2011
Where does the 'should' come from?
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bikerdude
On the left side of progressive
08:45 AM on 03/03/2011
Lots of questions, but no answers...Actually one sentence don't understand the value, is probably correct. I am struggling with this problem because I'm new and expecting miracles right out the gate I guess... People I know and love get GREAT value from meditating. I have positive examples, so it has to be my "thinking"...
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TheZenGirl
Love all things mind, body and spirit. Passionate
03:47 PM on 03/02/2011
It took me years of saying I would meditate before I actually did it. The reasons were exactly as you state 1) not enough time and 2) I didn't know how. So, I made the time and learned how because I was tired of hearing myself say I wanted to do something but never did. What I discovered is there are numerous ways to meditate and we just have to find the right one that works for us. After discovering the right modality for me, I wrote a blog post about I meditate effectively: http://zenfriend.org/how-to-meditate-effectively/. Now, I can't imagine a day without taking some time to mindfully breathe and re-connect with myself. My level of health, wellness, inner peace and happiness is higher than it's ever been thanks to meditation! Thanks for writing this great article, Philip.
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OneFish
Various and assorted mutualistic microbial buddies
03:05 AM on 03/02/2011
I have a real problem with the word "spirituality"

It appears to be so nebulous as to be completely devoid of meaning. It is a catch-all for vague, emotional spacing out.
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novabird
Lover of Life, Radical Centrist
04:21 AM on 03/02/2011
So 3,000 years of human spiritual practice and faith tradition is "vague, emotional spacing out"?

Umm, no.
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OneFish
Various and assorted mutualistic microbial buddies
12:18 PM on 03/02/2011
Uhm...YES!
07:21 PM on 03/02/2011
Like many words "spirituality" can have a multitude of meanings, especially as it relates to a persons inner life. For some, like yourself, it can have a vagueness and appear to be an emotional spacing out. For others, or maybe I should say for myself, it involves an inner adventure.
As it relates to meditation, for many this is a way and means of participating in the inner adventure. Of course one cannot expect to know a thing, whether it be meditation, spirituality or vanilla ice cream unless they taste it, metaphorically speaking.
02:20 PM on 03/10/2011
Good points. Thanks. Inner adventure is a good way of putting it! And that inner adventure will be reflected in the so-called "outer world", as our world depends upon our mind on every level.
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BeBop33
bob's yer uncle
10:20 PM on 03/01/2011
Sit yourself some zazen...it's good for what ails you...
09:22 PM on 03/01/2011
What a fabulous article! You nailed it with those two reasons.

Coincidentally, I wrote an article on my meditation blog very recently about a similar dilemma, why people feel overwhelmed about starting to meditate and how to get past that. I didn't start meditating in 1968, but I did start in 1981 following the same advice I give, and I have never looked back.... If your readers are interested, here it is: http://bit.ly/fAivtk

Thanks again.
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Annie Nonn
Always use tasteful words,you may have to eat them
11:30 PM on 03/01/2011
Hey thanks for the link-I've bookmarked it and hope to stop procrastinating and actually try it! f&f!
02:08 PM on 03/02/2011
Oh good, Annie :-)
01:57 AM on 03/02/2011
I agree, thanks for the link. I will use this as a resource for patients to go to.
02:09 PM on 03/02/2011
Thank you, glad to be of some help.
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Barbara Graham
Comin at u from Area 5150
02:55 PM on 03/01/2011
No, I don't "know I should meditate" any more than I "know I should pray."

Nope, no thanks. Navel gazing ain't for me.
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OneFish
Various and assorted mutualistic microbial buddies
03:03 AM on 03/02/2011
More often than not someone who invents problems and names them is about to sell you the solution. When you challenge them you will be told that you simply don't understand. It's an old pattern.

In this case I don't think he's devious, I think he means well, but his choice of words is irritating.

Neither meditation nor prayer is essential to a healthy, happy life and the lack thereof is no problem.
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bikerdude
On the left side of progressive
08:48 AM on 03/03/2011
Depends on the navel, I guess.
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Barbara Graham
Comin at u from Area 5150
02:12 PM on 03/03/2011
I reckon a long motorcycle ride qualifies as meditation. White line hypnosis...how did I wind up in the Six Flags parking lot? I was going to San Jose!
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Indigo1941
Time traveler.
02:53 PM on 03/01/2011
Meditation as a duty? If it's a duty, file under "later" and move on.
11:23 AM on 03/01/2011
I have been meditating for a little under a year and it has been invaluable for me in reducing anxiety and stress. Further to this is the enhancing of focus and using the 'mindfulness' idea of noticing when my mind is wandering when I should be concentrating and also noticing when I am worrying, which is always useless, so I can stop wasting my energy and time.
I recommend it to everyone, absolutely increases your life quality.
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novabird
Lover of Life, Radical Centrist
04:24 AM on 03/02/2011
One well known practice that includes meditation is MBSR (Mindfulness Based Stress Reduction) and has been thoroughly scientifically studied and shown to reduce stress, increase health, and provide numerous other benefits.
kellygreen
"Ideology is the Science of Idiots" John Adams
11:23 AM on 03/01/2011
Meditation also brings one face-to-face with what is going on inside of us.

For many people that includes the unresolved pains of trauma, abuse, etc... Pains that were pushed out of awareness because the person's heart-and-mind were not able to cope with it when it occurred.

Meditation can some times bring that pain roaring back into awareness, before the person has the capacity to tolerate experiencing the pain with the "anesthesia" of their coping strategies, or the tools with which to resolve what has come back to the surface.

In the Zen community there is a tradition of "sesshin"...an intensive meditation retreat where practiticoners meditate for several hours per day for up to a week or more at a time. There are many stories of relative newcomers to practice sitting sesshin...and not being able to cope with what they ind inside themselves by going so deeply, so quickly.

Even to the point of having panic attacks, and leaving the retreat.

Such people if they are not made aware that they are having a normal reaction to a painful past...may run away from practice, never to return.
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Saijanai
Micro bio? We don't need no stinkin' micro bio...
02:05 PM on 03/01/2011
Western medicine calls it "relaxation induced anxiety". TM theory calls it "unstressing" or officially "normalizing." The explanation is that meditation allows the nervous system to gain deep rest, which triggers repair activity, which is reflected by increased mental activity that is somewhat related to the original stressor, though perhaps only on an emotional level.
07:30 PM on 03/01/2011
kellygreen

faved.

Meditation is a two-edged sword.
08:56 AM on 03/01/2011
Philip,
I have to correct you in your opening line: "Not very long ago, the only people who practiced meditation regularly were Hindus and Buddhists, mostly in ashrams and monasteries." This is NOT a true statement. Meditation has been part of the Christian tradition since its inception, in fact, Jesus practiced meditation and contemplation and taught his disciples these same practices. While the Christian tradition of meditative practices have not been widely accessible to laypeople, the tradition is there nonetheless and was cultivated and guarded by men and women (both lay and ordained) in religious life, monasteries and hermitages. The challenge today is to get these practices out into the open so that all can enjoy the benefits. My book, Authentic Freedom, Claiming a Life of Contentment and Joy reveals these practices and makes them accessible to men and women of all faith traditions.
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Philip Goldberg
Philip Goldberg is a writer, public speaker and in
11:40 PM on 03/01/2011
All true. But here in America, which is what I was talking about and should have made explicit, Christian forms of meditation, and the Jewish equivalent, were not accessible to laypeople, and not even to most monastics. That they've been revived in recent decades is a great development, which I write about in American Veda, in the chapter on how Eastern practices have transformed Western religious practice.
08:23 AM on 03/01/2011
My own form of meditation, contemplation, quiet time, (lots of titles for it)......is a form of centering prayer as found in Thomas Keatings book; Open mind, Open heart....It basically involves sitting still and upright and just being quiet for 20 minutes in the morning...It's a prayer dependent on Gods grace not our own efforts but having said that, I'm sure it has natural benefits for you, whether you have a faith or not.......It is also important not to try to force anything either....thoughts will come and distract you but Thomas Keating has the advice to......RESIST no thought, however CLING TO NO THOUGHT and DON'T REACT emotionally to any thought.
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MikeDu
Both salubrious and lugubrious concurrently.
01:30 AM on 03/01/2011
Goal-oriented 'power' meditation in the American tradition sounds self-contradictory. The practice sort'a becomes meditation-as-calesthenics. Mind-quieting exercses for the self-obsessed.