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Randy Taran

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5 Steps to Happiness

Posted: 09/14/11 09:38 AM ET

Some people set New Year's resolutions, but I find this season, as school starts again, to be a perfect time for new beginnings. Right now I am thinking of setting some intentions, and I invite you to do the same.

As the autumn leaves fall, consider shedding old habits that no longer serve you. It's a great time to focus on who you are and what practices will grow your happiness. What are the attitudes that will move you along? Here are five ideas that can make a difference:

1. Choose something you want to focus on. It could be getting more exercise, connecting with nature, taking a course you've been interested in or making regular time to connect with someone you love. By the way, that someone could be you. What are you longing for? Build it into your calendar. It matters more than you think. Try choosing just one thing. As the saying goes, "If you chase two rabbits, both will escape." What is your one thing?

2. Mind your mindset. When embarking on your one thing, cut yourself some slack. You don't have to qualify as an expert in the first week. Dr. Carole Dweck of Stanford University talks about growth and fixed mindsets. A fixed mindset thinks all or nothing: You are either good at playing guitar, learning a new language, new sport, etc., or you are not. A growth mindset knows that if you practice anything, even though you'll deal with some obstacles along the way, your skills will grow. Anything can be learned.

3. Lighten up. Check your closet for clothes, jackets or accessories you haven't worn for years. Cart them to a Goodwill or a nonprofit that helps others get a new start. Then look for a special piece of clothing that you feel great in. It doesn't have to be an expensive piece -- consignment stores are often where designers shop for inspiration. Consider a color that makes you feel alive. Let whatever you choose bring a smile to your face every time you put it on.

4. Grow your gratitude. The truth is you were born happy, and you can reawaken that happiness inside. Gratitude is a powerful pathway. Keep a gratitude journal beside your bed and jot down three things that you are grateful for at least once a week. In one study, by Emmons and McCullough, people practicing gratitude felt 25 percent happier than those who weren't; they also felt more optimistic about the future. Gratitude is a game changer.

5. Think of how you want to be in the world. An interesting exercise is to imagine yourself at the end of your days. What qualities would you like to be remembered for? Caring, creativity, steadfastness, warm-heartedness, friendship, humor ... what is it for you? Start paying special attention to expressing those qualities now. You can evolve into what you aspire to be.

Even in the face of external challenges, our internal resources are stronger than we may think. In the words of Victor Frankl, "The last of human freedoms is to choose one's attitude in any given set of circumstances." This fall, and every day for that matter, you have a renewed opportunity to choose yours.

What does fall represent to you? What are your intentions this season?

 

Follow Randy Taran on Twitter: www.twitter.com/randytaran

Some people set New Year's resolutions, but I find this season, as school starts again, to be a perfect time for new beginnings. Right now I am thinking of setting some intentions, and I invite you to...
Some people set New Year's resolutions, but I find this season, as school starts again, to be a perfect time for new beginnings. Right now I am thinking of setting some intentions, and I invite you to...
 
 
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08:27 AM on 10/03/2011
CONTENTMENT


No one is immune to the pitfalls of stress
Though some seem to avoid its toll.
The three qualities that set hardy people apart
Are love of challenge, commitment and control.

People who are happy tend to see challenge, or change
As an opportunity for growth not a threat.
Their commitment means involvement and engaging life
In marriage, children, the work place, the battlefield or debt.

Those who rate higher in their duties of commitment
Feel more meaning and purpose in what they achieve.
The third trait control, is essentially determination
To have triumphs in life by how we respond and believe.

There are skills, habits, and traits to adopt and cultivate
Which help make the smart decisions we depend on for life.
It also helps to take time for prayer and self-evaluation
To make sure we haven’t changed from the dilemmas of strife.

Optimism along with positive thinking comes naturally
When our need to serve others we refuse to deny or ration.
Contentment takes hard work, grit, faith and spirituality
Lots of love, understanding, forgiveness, and compassion.


By Tom Zart
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08:25 AM on 10/03/2011
SATISFACTION


Too many people never know satisfaction
For their goals for happiness are placed too high.
Most of us complain about what we can't have
When we're not bedfast or in the grave, we lie.

No one finds satisfaction from serving themselves
Contentment takes place, by our unselfish concern.
The more we repent and regret our wrongs
The more we are able to retain what we learn.

So tally your blessings and be thankful for life
And remember there are those who wish, they were you.
Satisfaction and love are what mere mortal's pray for
Though the lucky among us, who feel both, are few.

By Tom Zart
10:12 PM on 09/26/2011
A wonderful reminder. There's something about the fall that makes it the perfect time to create new resolutions.
Easier said than done, but I do love Viktor Frankl's wisdom: "The last of human freedoms is to choose one's attitude in any given set of circumstances." He wrote down those words while living under terrible circumstances, as hard as our circumstances are, we can still do it.
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Cammi Vaughan
Listening is giving.
09:34 PM on 09/19/2011
Meditation helps a lot with happiness, peacefulness, and also helps people drop injurious habits with less of a struggle. I like Transcendental Meditation, but there are many other meditation paths that are available and good.
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laymancanuck
Left of centre, because it works for everyone.
05:27 PM on 09/16/2011
Thank you Randy for taking the time to read the comments and responding. A great lesson in kind acts generating happiness in the world.
09:54 PM on 09/15/2011
In the political world there seems to be huge amounts of dissatisfaction. Obviously, hard economic times are not helping. I don't know if you have noticed, and I hope it is not true, but it seems to be spreading into personal relationships.

Unfortunately, many people mistakenly think the road to prosperity and happiness... is the old fashioned way... through violence and greed. I truly hope we do not go the route of that mob mentality.

I want to thank everyone out there who smiles, shows kindness, and works on a higher road.
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RandyTaran
Author, Filmmaker and Founder, Project Happiness
04:05 PM on 09/16/2011
It's through people like you that we will not go the way of mob mentality. There is no doubt that working on a higher road benefits all of us. Thanks so much for writing!
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Lawson Meadows
Plant in your kids, the seeds of greatness!
01:29 AM on 09/15/2011
Randy,

Excellent steps: expecially #5, which I think most people omit. Many have something about which they claim to be passionate, yet never clearly imagine being fully engaged. They make the mistake of seeing hopes and wishes as plans and goals. Then again, focus and committment are relatively rare qualities...

Thanks for the list!
Lawson
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RandyTaran
Author, Filmmaker and Founder, Project Happiness
04:06 PM on 09/16/2011
Lawson,
Agreed. Thanks, as always, for your wonderful comments!
:) Randy
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Robert Blackburn
03:16 PM on 09/14/2011
If you cannot change your attitude to find happiness, you might try changing the world in which you live.
See: http://revolutionofreason.com and http://www.youtube.com/RobertLBlackburn
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RandyTaran
Author, Filmmaker and Founder, Project Happiness
04:11 PM on 09/16/2011
Yes, and there are many ways to change the world. I am fond of Gandhi's view to "Be the change you want to see in the world." That can touch others in subtle but powerful ways. I appreciate your comment.
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laymancanuck
Left of centre, because it works for everyone.
01:03 PM on 09/14/2011
We are all responsible for our own emotional experience. Regardless of external influence, chose happiness or at least confident calmness.
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RandyTaran
Author, Filmmaker and Founder, Project Happiness
04:17 PM on 09/16/2011
Love the idea of confident calmness. Happiness comes in many shades from profound yet quiet joy to yell at the top of your lungs exuberance. Thanks for sharing.
12:24 PM on 09/14/2011
I like these thoughtful steps for pursuing happiness. For the past few months I've been praticing Anusara yoga. I can see where each of these 5 steps can help my yoga practice, and overall happiness.

www.feelgoodtracker.com
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RandyTaran
Author, Filmmaker and Founder, Project Happiness
04:20 PM on 09/16/2011
I'm so happy you are into Anusara yoga - definitely a pathway to happiness. I'm a big fan. Great stuff!