THE BLOG
08/15/2013 05:03 pm ET Updated Oct 15, 2013

5 New Ways for Him to Pee on Your Eyelids

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Everyone knows that to keep a relationship strong, you need to keep things hot in the sack. Next time you find yourself stuck in a routine, try these five sizzling new ways for him to pee on your eyelids:

Kitchen Leak
Next time your man offers to cook you dinner, pop open your favorite bottle of wine and pour him a glass. While he's sipping and sautéing, sneak up from between his legs and get your face right in his package. Give him a sexy, confident look as you unzip his fly. Then he should pee in your eyelids. Cocktail hour complete!

Hilltop Drizzle
Climb a large hill with your guy. Remind him to stay hydrated. When you get to the top, let him release everything that was in that Nalgene directly onto your eyelids. You'll love the view from the pee-k.

Urinal Sneak
Call one of your lover's coworkers and gain access to the office bathroom closest to his cubicle. Sneak in at 11 a.m., and unscrew the drains in all the urinals. Hide below them until he eventually comes in to relieve himself. Anticipate which urinal he'll use, and then squeeze your head through the tiny drain hole to intercept his flow. Just seeing your eyelids in place of the urinal cake will have him whizzing like a racehorse.

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