I Didn't Want To Go

All he knew was that I was there, and that I was proud of him.
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I didn't want to go to my son's practice tonight.

I'm sure some will immediately think, "What kind of mother says such a thing?"

Well, I guess...me.

It had nothing to do with my little boy or his football coach or team or the fact that they were having practice. I love that he's involved in sports and I for one, love his love for athletics.

I'll be honest, I was pretty miserable the entire time.

Maybe it was because I was exhausted from an entire day of chasing four young children and instead of getting things crossed off of my list, things got added to it.

Maybe it was because we showed up an hour early as we didn't have the time change that was different than the two nights before.

Maybe it was because we did the normal shuffle of rushing through dinner, hurriedly getting kids dressed as my husband and I did the "divide and conquer" swap off as he takes two kids in one direction, and I take two kids in another.

Maybe it was because I couldn't help but think of the overflowing box of emails I had to return and a proposal I had to write before morning, all after the daunting task of bath time and then ... bedtime.

But as I we drove home, I am sure that I will never forget what transpired.

"Mommy, did you think I did good?"

I will be honest, as I chased my 23 month old almost the entire time, I barely got to lay eyes on him. But I know my son, and I know the few glances I did get, and had the safe but true response, "You sure did, Bud. You did great out there! Rocked it out, as always!"

He was sitting in his booster chair directly behind my driver's seat, and I had reached my hand behind me to grab his. He immediately embraced mine, and as I shot him a glance in the rear view mirror, his face lit up.

Little did he know how I felt about that practice, and at this point, I had been completely ashamed for how I felt. And little did he know I wasn't able to watch nearly enough of him as I should have been able to.

But all he knew was that I was there, and that I was proud of him.

As he pulled his hand away, what happened next made my heart want to burst.

I thought he was done, but he said, "Here, Mommy. Switch hands. Hold this one now."

He gave me his other hand to hold and gently, yet tightly, took it right into his little palm.

This is how we rode the last few miles to get home.

Behind the monotony of some days - past the exhaustion - through the sometimes forced daily duties, you find the blessings that remind you of how lucky you truly really are.

You can follow Long at The Real Deal of Parenting

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