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August 20, 2007 News Update

Karl Rove leaves White House. Now President Bush will have to screw up on his own.

Tony Snow also to leave before end of Bush's term. Can't say rats leaving sinking ship since ship has already sunk.

Old job: Canonizing Bush. New job: Demonizing Hillary.

Polls show 36% of Americans approve of Bush's performance in office. Must be Fox News (sic) viewers.

Bush daughter engaged to be married. If there's White House wedding, nobody involved in Iraq War will take part in planning.

Former House Speaker Dennis Hastert says he won't seek re-election. Another statesman gone.

One Thompson (Tommy) out of presidential race. Another Thompson (Fred) almost in. Fred Thompson says students at Virginia Tech should have had guns to protect themselves, also mocks global warming. Better stick to being a DA, Fred.

From the Department of Who Cares: Did any presidential candidates have a debate this week?

Also From the Department of Who Cares: Was there a spacewalk this week?

Fed cuts interest rates. Economy-saving move or bailout of speculators?

Mattel recalls more than 9 million toys made in China.

Bob Nardelli, ousted as CEO of Home Depot over excessive pay controversy ($38 million/year salary, $210 million severance pay) and poor stock performance named CEO of Chrysler at reported salary of $1/year. Still overpaid?

School district superintendent in New Hyde Park, NY, calls for changing name of annual Christmas Concert to Winter Concert. Let's just make it the Frosty The Snowman Concert.

NY Department of Education names Jewish educator who speaks no Arabic as head of new Arabic-themed school after firing Islamic principal in T-shirt controversy. Must be the same people who are running our Middle East policy.