March 20 News Update

05/25/2011 11:50 am ET

President Bush again defends Iraq War in major speech, saying "We will not lose our nerve." What he doesn't say is what we WILL lose: Billions more dollars and hundreds more lives.

President accuses Iran of helping insurgents by providing components for roadside bombs. Top General says he's seen no evidence of that. Is George "Slam Dunk" Tenet slipping intelligence information to the White House again?

Saddam Hussein turns testimony at his trial into ranting call for Iraqis to unite to fight Americans. But the Administration wants you to know the trial is "making progress."

In this country, prosecutors screw up sentencing phase of terrorist Zacarias Moussaoui's trial so badly that a death sentence now appears impossible. Can't these guys get anything right?

"Mission-Accomplished" Iraqi War marks its third anniversary in wake of major sectarian violence. And to think it was only a few months ago that Darth Cheney told us the insurgency was in its "last throes."

White House issues National Security Strategy document on foreign policy. The good news? Bush does have a foreign policy. The bad news? It's the Bush foreign policy.

Cheney appears on "Face The Nation" to defend Iraqi War. Make that "Disgrace The Nation."

HHS Secretary advises Americans to prepare for Avian Flu outbreak by stocking up on powdered milk and canned tuna and putting them under your bed. Right next to the duct tape?

Aforementioned NSS document names Iran as US Enemy #1 and defends right to pre-emptive war. Iranians better start stocking up on powdered milk and canned tuna.

National debt hits 30 trillion dollars, 50% more than when Bush entered office. His hero really is Ronald Reagan.

Mike Wallace announces retirement from "60 Minutes." He actually retired several years ago, but nobody noticed. Average age on show drops to 75?

Jessica Simpson says she won't meet with the President when she goes to Washington. She's afraid Bill Clinton might hit on her.

Picasso drawing bought through Costco turns out to be a fake. Next time you want to buy a Picasso, try Wal-Mart.