The 'N' Word is Never Acceptable

No matter what any one says, whether they are black or white or even God himself (not that he would use the word), it is never, ever OK to use the 'N' word. In a joke, in a song, in private conversations, never, ever should the word be seen as acceptable to use. There are no exceptions.

African Americans are deceiving themselves if they think that they "own" the word and only they are allowed to use it, as was suggested by Whoopi Goldberg and Sherri Shepherd this week on The View when they discussed Jesse Jackson's invocation of the term. If you recall, Jackson landed in hot water last week when he was heard on a 'hot' mic saying he wanted to remove a part of Barack Obama's male anatomy. What wasn't heard or even reported until now is that Jackson also used the 'N' word.

Is Jackson a racist for saying he wanted to remove Obama's testicles? Many would say "no," because both he and Obama are black. For this reason, Jackson's comments get the 'in bad taste' label, instead of the 'racist' label. But how exactly did he get away with making such an offensive comment? A white man would have been castrated, metaphorically speaking of course, for uttering those words. The answer lies in history: During the Jim Crow era black men who were lynched were often also castrated by white men. If a white man of Jackson's prominence had made similar remarks he would probably be looking for another country to live in (even if he was speaking metaphorically, like Jackson). Lesson to learn: When it comes to race politics in America, what's good for the goose isn't always good for the gander.

But, even if America is going to give a 'pass' to Jackson's castration comments, no American, black or white or otherwise, should be comfortable with the use of the 'N' word. Some blacks have tried to take the sting out of the term by using the word themselves, by taking 'control' of it. Sorry folks, but that won't work. It's like body odor. No matter how you try to cover it up with cologne or spray, body odor is body odor, no matter whose body it comes from. The only way to get rid of it is to wash it away. Or, more crudely, crap stinks, no matter how you try to mask the smell. Likewise, the 'N' word is demeaning, hurtful, and derogatory no matter who says it.

Blacks are doing themselves a disservice if they continue to assert that they can use the word when it is taboo for people of other races to do so. How can we become one united group sharing the same values and ideas when separate rules are set up for different individuals? Some blacks say they use the word as a term of endearment. What?! History has already defined the word as being negative. Why then would a person want to endear a person with such a negative word? Can't another word be used, like 'honey?'

Any attempt to justify the use of a word that historically has a negative meaning, is an indication of deeper psychological issues with the group or person justifying its use.

Comments

[JR146]

DeeDee1959 - I understand it isn't simple. But they only allow you 250 words to express yourself here. I can't cover much with that, and I've already used about 10%. Had I more room to write, I would have added that the majority of those in "the black community", do not believe the same things that Rev. Wright, Al Sharpton, and Jesse Jackson believe. They think more like Bill Cosby and Barack Obama.

The race of those who robbed me is irrelevant. I don't have much use for white boys who can't pull their pants up either. The message I was trying to convey, is that most perceived cases of racism are simply that: Perceived. That doesn't mean it actually existed. And whining about language isn't going to solve anything. It only serves to maintain the racists that are still hanging around. Saying Don Imus is a racist over the words that he used is ridiculous. Costing him his means to fund his charity is heartless. And quite racist of Al Sharpton, I might add.

The end result is what we should be concerned about. And this is the end result: I would love to have some black friends. I think "the black community" has added much beauty to our culture. But I don't have any black friends; because I don't like being stopped every other sentence to explain what I mean by "you people". I have enough things to annoy me in my life.

[MoeB]

I'm completely on the fence about this. I just feel a little iffy whenever I hear someone say we should NEVER use a word. I understand words are powerful, but they hold power because of how those words are perceived.

I don't use the "N" word (correction, I do if I'm singing lyrics to a song that uses the word)...but I don't care if other people use it. I just try to always point out that MY lack of concern over the word may not equate the same with another person--black, white, brown, whatever.

For me, I tend to look at the bigger problem. Racial slurs are NOT the problem. Racism is. Do people really think that racism will end by banning the N-word? It could be a start, but I think rebellion will occur and in fact MORE people would start using it.

THat said, I understand Rob's point about this whole lame 'I use it as a term of endearment' nonsense. I hear blacks all the time using the word in a not so nice manner toward other blacks, so I'm not buying that at ALL.

[DeeDee1959]

MoeB, just imagine if the use of the N-word somehow became uncool for the blacks who use it and if it did become totally deplorable to all Americans. It may not completely eliminate racism but I don't think it would hurt. I would love the opportunity to see what difference it could possibly make. Remember the enlightenment that Richard Pryor described in 1970s when he realized that it was a word that he didn't need to use? I got the sense that he freed himself from some of his own self hatred. Healing of the spirit can start from within and is worth trying. And as a country we all should strive for improvement in civility and mature above racial slurs as we communicate with each other.

[JR146]

Dear DeeDee1959 - You can imagine all you want. The fact is, you cannot rid any language of a word. Especially when you give it so much attention. The only time a word exits a language, is when it becomes irrelevant. When there is no reason to use it anymore. You don't hear the word "groovy" much anymore. That is because it is viewed as a stupid word by society today. If you don't like a word, don't use it. And ignore it if you do hear it. Seeking to stop people from using anything, is an exercise in futility. You can educate, and hope for the best. But seeking to punish people over the language they use, is far too authoritarian for my taste. I am interested in freedom above all else. And I understand that with freedom, comes many things I do not like. Telling people what words they can and cannot use, is completely inconsistent with the concept of freedom.

[tfnews]

As an African-American woman, the word is extremely offensive to me no matter who uses it. It conjures up an old idea of the black race being lower than another race. Period. It's not a term of endearment.The origin of the word is what makes it so offensive. I don't care if it's used in a song, or a poem, or a joke or anything else and I don't care who says it- i's an ugly, hateful word.
Racial slurs are a problem because they reveal what the user feels about a person. And those feelings incite a reaction from the person on which it was used. It's almost a knee-jerk reaction.
Some people will say: 'I know it was used in the days of slavery, but if we take the word back and use it in our own way, we take the sting out of it.' Nope. That's a lie. If that were true, the word would never have caused this type or reaction. Here we are in 2008 still having heated discussions about the use of this six-letter word.
That says to me that the word still has a negative sting to it and should not be used.
Let the "N" word disappear by discontinuing the use of it.

[JR146]

I beg to differ. I've been mugged three times in my life, all three times by young black males. The N-word is perfectly acceptable to describe the punks who robbed me. The N-word. How childish. I think it is high time that the black community grows up. Same goes for feminists and the B-word. Or whatever hyphenated b.s. people come up with.

If you want to live in a free country, you had better stop thinking you have a right to pick my words for me. Feminists and the black community ask that I be sensitive to their emotions. But they make zero effort to understand anyone else's. And it doesn't stop with the n-word. Black liberation theology teaches that syphilis started because white people have sex with sheep. But they do not see that as racist. We need to kick the crutch of racism and sexism out from under these people. No one is keeping them down but themselves. It is time to end the hypocrisy.

[DeeDee1959]

JR146, first let me say that I'm so sorry that you were mugged by ANYONE. If they had been young white males would the injury have been less for you? I am an AA that is not sure that there really is such a simple thing as a "black community" to "grow up" with regards to the N-word. I live in a community of people of many races, the least of which are black. I still have hope for the day of "judging people by the content of their character" as I strive to see everyone that I encounter - with the hope that they are a good person until I'm proven wrong. We should all live with civility and respect and call ourselves and each other by our given name and not by a slur. Please don't be sucked in to believe that the extreme rants of the particular Black Liberation Theology mouthpieces being paraded on your TV represent views of the masses of AAs - extremists make news. Be safe and be blessed.

[JR146]

You would also be better off to assume that everyone you meet is a jerk. That is how I now approach people, and I haven't been hurt in years. We are killing people for oil now. I don't think there is much character left in America. Make people earn your respect first, rather than give it to them in the name of civility.

Barack Obama is our only hope in finding the content of our collective character in this country. He is our only hope for turning the tide of hatred the world feels towards us. And that hatred is not unjustified. Black folks in this country complain about the evils of slavery, while they are dressed from head to toe in over priced clothes made in sweatshops overseas. We say that we went into Iraq to get Saddam, because he filled mass graves with 300,000 people. We dug those graves, when we told those Shias in southern Iraq to overthrow Saddam in 1993 (and then abandoned them). That kind of hypocrisy is easy to hate, and results in people flying airplanes into your skyscrapers.

The big picture Dear. Focus. The N-word is a ridiculous thing to call an issue.

[Ibackobama]

I totally agree with this article. I heard an AA rapper trying to defend the use of it by using 'a instead of 'er and thought to myself, now theres a mess if I've ever heard one. I tell my kids all the time, it is NEVER ok to use the word, in any way, shape or form because how would you feel if someone used it on you thinking that you are ok with it. So trying to justify it within our community, just means you are giving everyone a chance to say 'well, they use it so why can't we'

[Adam11]

I am a black man. and i say so what if some one use the N word.

If: white man calls black man N word. black man reply the Red word or the H word or the trailer word.

u cant say am black ill use the N but no one else can, that is so bathetic and BULL!!.

Yes N word is offensive,but so as the H, Red and Trailer words too.

i say lets use all the WORD. the N, the RED, the H, and the TRAILER.

[Jezreel]

Superb article. I couldn't agree with Rob Harper more. As an AA woman, mother and grandparent I have an intimate awareness of the meaning and emotional impact of the "N" word. When my sons were youngsters I took time to teach them about the history and derivation of the word and encouraged their self respect . I taught them to respect themselves and to appreciate the historical contributions of African Americans to our nation.

I admonished them to conduct with dignity and to avoid using self-deprecating and derogatory terms to describe themselves and other AA people, both male and female. As a comedian, Whoopi Goldberg is not unlike many other entertainers who use derogatory terms to describe African Americans. However, I have never considered the "N" word an appropriate designation of AA's. Whoopi also uses the "B" word to describe women.

Approximately 50% of AA males fail to graduate from High School . And far too many AA girls grow up with little to no self-esteem. Everyday our children are told by the media and even by those among us who are suffering from self-hatred that they are not valued and they not physically beautiful. On top of personal failure and low self-esteem our young people do not need derogatory terms for self identification. I disagree entirely with those who define either word as a term of endearment. And I don't think that either term fosters positive self-esteem or promotes personal dignity.

[YuryGetsin]

Overuse of the word cannot empower, that much is true. Nevertheless, it can, over many years, take the sting and power out of a word that symbolized everything that was wrong with our country.

It just does not have the same meaning to my generation. We don't see it that way.

[tfnews]

YuryGetsin, your generation does not see the use of the "N" word "that way" because it does not apply to you. So your point of reference is a bit skewed.
You said there's a word in Russian that means "Jew" and that it does not bother you as a Jewish man. I understand why it does not bother you: You are a Jew. But calling someone the "N" word is offensive because that's not what we are. Now, if someone called me 'black,' I wouldn't be offended because I AM black. It's just not the same.
I just don't see why some African-Americans insist on using the "N" word. I have never heard of a Jewish person calling another Jewish person "my Hitler," so why do we have to call each other the "N" word? It would be as demeaning as one Jewish person calling another Jewish person by some horrific reference to the Holocaust. Any derogatory reference to another's race is completely unacceptable.
And I think any ancestors that you may have who remember the horrors of the Holocaust would agree with me: Any reference to a traumatic time in the past of your people should not be taken lightly and should not be perpetuated, even within the younger generations, simply because you don't "see it that way."

[OrganizersWin]

The "N" word is never acceptable to YOU and to many who agree with YOU. Point taken. For me, the "N" word is just a word, no doubt with all the ugliness that this article highlights. I do not fear words, or the honest expression of the meanings behind them. The word loses power NOT from prohibiting its use, but when WE as a society comes totally to terms with our silly fears and emotional immaturity.....

I find it hard, that in an 'academic' setting, to be so afraid of a word, that we have to use the 'first letter', as though we were small children. That said....

The Washington Redskins should maybe adopt the Cleveland Indians' "Chief Wahoo" logo, and chant the Fl. State Seminole "War-cry" during their games....???

You know, words and symbols can be awful... but what is REALLY awful is the violence, hatred, injustice, and evils that pervade much of our history and our culture. In one word... FEAR! Fearing a word does not help the cause. Does it suck that people use it, and it makes things "ugly"? Yes... But with so much more "ugly" that is far more REAL than a mere 'word'.... I choose to not fear the word, rather to approach it with as much common sense as a doorknob, and I will be ok.

[clr2]

Thank you, thank you! This is a great message coming from a young black man. You didn't say the word should be banned or books containing the word should be burned. You are talking about taking personal responsibility for what we say. Bravo!

[tjntn]

How absurd! Quite a few books that are considered classics and, indeed, which are sympathetic to African American cause, have this word in them - so we should burn these books? Ridiculous! I don't think you meant that but you seemed to leave no room for ANY exceptions in your post.

Context is important. When used in a historical framework to teach what should not be done, the word has no fangs. But even when used in the most despicable way by a racist, they have the Constitutional right to say it. I won't stress the 1st Amendment here because I think you were trying to say that the word is socially unacceptable rather than legally unacceptable. But I do contend that are places where the word needs to be used, to teach and remind us all of the hatred that African Americans have experienced and how this word was associated with that hatred.

[whatwouldawhitewomando]

I'm black. I dont use the word, but I have used it in the pass, when I was less conscious. It simply doesnt feel good to hear it or say it. I feel the same way about the casual use of the word "b"word, the energy behind it is mean and demeaning even when said between friends. I just doesn't work.

[LABC]

Amen!

[wwsword]

Words are letters arranged in an order. The meaning of words depends on who says them, where they are said, why they are said, and about whom they are said. Nobody is forbidden to use any word.

Take the word "queer." A straight man calling a gay man a "queer" with the intent to degrade that man is one thing. A gay man calling another gay man a "queer" with the intent to steal the power of that word from heterosexists is another thing. Saying "queer" to talk about the word "queer" is yet another thing. We can't weaken the word if we can't play with it. We can't talk about the word if we can't say it.

Ever hear of Randall Kennedy? Kennedy, a black man, who wrote a book about a word and its history. It's a fascinating and important book. Kennedy can't say the name of his book on radio and television programs because of speech codes that prevent the word from being uttered. A black man's speech is being suppressed.

Free speech must be defended with the same intensity as the freedom of religion (First Amendment) and privacy (Fourth Amendment). (Interesting, no, that Obama opposes both?) Oppressed groups must never be told how to use a word that was used to dominate them because this furthers the power of the word over them. Taking power from words by turning them around is a point of struggle.

Please, Huffington Post, elevate your discourse.

[preatorius]

So what if Randall Kenneday (A Black man) wrote a book. If he used an offensive term as a title to try to rake in more cash, he gambled and lost.
There are millions of other words that he could have used.
One more thing. FOr the record, just because some ill-advised black person uses the word, doesn't make it any less offensive. In fact, it is more offensive, because the user has internalized oppressioon and thinks is ok. Some people are just too ignorant to get it!

[wwsword]

The book was about the word, preatorius. You didn't pick up on that? A black man writing a sociohisto­rical/soci­olegal analysis about a word that has been used to degrade the group of which he is a member and he isn't allowed to use the word - that doesn't signal to you anything the presence of a repressive thought-control culture? Do you not see how absurd it would be to write a physics book about gravity without being able to use the word "gravity."

[dbartenstein]

If this had been Don Imus then Jesse Jackson and Al Sharpton would have been demanding his head on a plate..... oh, wait!

[several]

Great article.

As a 'liberal white guy', on the rare occasions when I hear a white person use the 'N' word I'm quick to say "that's really offensive, please don't use that word around me." The reactions are never fun, but I really think that's the best way to get rid of white-on-black racism (or at least force it underground for good): for non-racist whites to tell bigoted whites that it is not Ok to sling racial slurs around, or express racist attitudes, just because their are no people of color in the room.

When I hear blacks use the N-word I cringe with just as much discomfort, but I'd be an idiot to call them out on it unless they're close friends (and my close friends don't use the word) so I just keep my mouth shut. I've tried to get the 'taking back the word" or "owning it" concept, but I've never really thought it rings true. It just sounds like a justification for internalizing someone else's hatred.

[YuryGetsin]

As a fellow liberal white guy, you and I need to talk. We are not the ones in the business of making words disappear; that's the other side's job. Words are the record of human history, and human history must be remembered in full. There are generations to come who will know nigger only from history books and hip-hop.

The word is dying already. It dies as the people who witnessed brutality die. Banning its use is just knee-jerk political correctness.

There is a word in Russian reserved only for Jews. I do not have Cyrillic letters here, but its meaning is simply "Jew;" they can try as hard as they want to give it a negative connotation, but I don't feel insulted when someone calls me a Jew.

Again, banning words gives them power.

Obama/Biden 08

[several]

I didn't say a thing about banning words. I talked about combating racism.

Asking someone not to use words in your presence which you find offensive is not banning. Only laws can ban things.

Pointing out to people that it is not okay to behave in a racist way just because there are no people of color in the room is a far cry from lobbying for laws banning words.

You had a knee-jerk reaction to what you thought I was saying rather than to what I actually wrote.

[Emancipator]

What is certain is that as long as blacks continue to call each other the n-word, they will continue to devalue their own race, and ultimately, themselves. Great article...this word simply can't be desensitized nor sanitized.

[nectanebus]

Great article. Jackson has been stripped bare, we see him as he has always been. Only the so called black leaders use the grossly pejorative n word against their own people.
Jackson is NO LONGER BLACK!! He has been rendered terminally GREEN WITH ENVY now that Obama has transcended race, and is reaping the benefits of the VICTORIOUS civil rights movement.
The feminist movement is going through the same death throes, brought about by their own success.
What their reactions reveal is that they were never interested in real victory....ONLY PERSONAL POWER!!