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Are You Avoiding Your Life?

Posted: 09/20/10 08:00 AM ET

Last week, I put up an article on the difference between thought and action "thinking" that not much would come of it in terms of reader responses. It's safe to say I miscalculated! The basic idea that "the universe rewards action, not thought" seems to have provoked a wide range of responses. With hindsight, I can understand why this piece engaged so many people and generated so many comments.

One of the more refreshing aspects to the comments was the range of thoughtful comments engaged on both sides of the agreement spectrum. Some agreed with various thoughtful additions, some disagreed thoughtfully, while others were more disagreeable than thoughtful. Some found value in the ideas and some, although in violent agreement, seemed to have missed the boat anyway.

My use of the term "the universe" engaged many, and enraged others. Some went on about the laws of the universe, attraction and the like while others railed against whatever they chose to mean by the use of the term.

The distinctions between action and thought are not binary, either/or points of view, much less polemics, which may be difficult to grasp for those who prefer argument to dialogue. Positive thinking doesn't work without accompanying positive action. Rarely does positive action occur without first having engaged in some kind of positive thought. (Positive in this use of the word means focused on a positive outcome).

It's kind of like looking for a new job: it will be hard for you to even look if your first thoughts are "it's impossible out there." It will be even harder to get hired if you enter the interview with the thought "they won't want me." It should also be clear that simply holding the positive thought that there's a good job out there for you won't be enough to land it either -- you still have to get off your "buts" and do something (but it won't work, but they won't want me, but there are already too many people looking for the same job, but, but, but).

If you combine the message from my positive thinking article with the one from last week about "the universe" rewarding action, you might come up with something akin to thinking about that new job, preparing for it, applying for it, going for the interview and then getting rejected anyway. What then? I know I've been through that one before and I had the good sense to ask the prospective employer if they had any feedback about why I didn't get the job.

In this particular and very real instance, I learned something about my resume, how I portrayed my skill set and even more about the fact that I spent my time "selling" myself and almost no time asking anything about the company. That turned out to be great feedback which I put to good use on my next interview, using the feedback to learn more about the prospective employer before even applying.

Indeed, the universe does reward action, and sometimes that reward may show up in the form of "negative feedback." The universe could be anyone, anywhere, ranging from that prospective employer to your husband or wife. The point, which I hope is obvious to those readers who are actually thinking about this, not just preparing to fire off another salvo, is that thinking first is good, acting on your thoughts is good, and listening to the feedback may just be critical to your success.

Some readers commented on a different aspect of thinking, one that comes from a more spiritual perspective on the mind and mindfulness. Several commented on the power of meditation and how the act of meditating can open channels of awareness and instruction.

Indeed, having meditated for nearly 40 years now, I have some idea how this works. Meditation can be a great way of attuning yourself to higher thoughts and preparing for life out in the world. However, meditation can also be a great way to avoid taking responsibility for your own life.

Years ago, I was teaching a seminar about awareness, accountability and responsibility (the ability to respond). The participants were all students of the same spiritual practice and the spiritual leader himself was one of the participants. Midway through the seminar, one of the participants stood up and said something close to this: "I spend six to eight hours a day, every day, meditating, inviting the presence of spirit, and still my life is rocky. Why?" I responded simply: "You meditate six to eight hours a day? What a great way to avoid your life!" All the heads in the room spun in unison, looking toward the spiritual teacher, who simply nodded in the affirmative.

Now, had this person said that meditating six to eight hours a day had transformed his life, and that he was enjoying the result, or anything of the kind, my response would have been quite different. However, in this case, he was saying that things were still rocky.

For many, the act of meditating may serve to bring greater awareness and perhaps greater peace while they are meditating. For many, one value of meditation is to bring that awareness and peace into that which they will be doing during the day. Most of us still need to go out into the world and act in accordance with those thoughts and inspirations that we have developed, whether through simple thought or practiced meditation.

One reader, Emmanuel Goldstein, put it rather elegantly, assuming you don't mind a wine analogy:

An idea not acted upon is like a delightful wine left corked. You may know it will be good, but you're never gonna catch a buzz 'til you pop the cork and drink the contents.


What do you think about this approach to life? Where do thought and action intersect? What is the role of feedback from your "universe?" Let me know how this strikes you and if you would like to explore this rough idea in more depth.

Please do leave a comment here or drop me an email and let me know your experience.

***

Russell Bishop is an Educational Psychologist, author, executive coach and management consultant, based in Santa Barbara California. Watch for my new book coming out in January, 2011 Workarounds That Work: How to Conquer Anything That Stands in Your Way at Work. You can find out more about Russell at http://www.lessonsinthekeyoflife.com. Contact Russell by email at: Russell (at) lessonsinthekeyoflife.com

 
 
 

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Last week, I put up an article on the difference between thought and action "thinking" that not much would come of it in terms of reader responses. It's safe to say I miscalculated! The basic idea t...
Last week, I put up an article on the difference between thought and action "thinking" that not much would come of it in terms of reader responses. It's safe to say I miscalculated! The basic idea t...
 
 
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Peter Aursnes
Author, coach, cheese & life connoisseur
12:39 PM on 09/23/2010
I think that thoughts, or perhaps more important outside ideas accepted by us lead to feelings or our beliefs which again lead to action and ultimately results. Positive thinking will over time lead to a positive set of beliefs which will give confident action because we truly believe in what we're doing. On the other side we have reason based action, we do it because we think we have to, not because we believe in it.
11:05 AM on 09/23/2010
A different perspective regarding thought verses action:
"The psychological state which contemplatives call the prayer of quiet is a common condition of mystical attainment, it is not by itself mystical at all. It is a state of preparation, a way of opening the door. That which comes in when the door is opened will be that which we truly and passionately desire. The will makes plain the way : the heart-the whole man-conditions the guest. He is a pilgrim that still seeks his country . Urged by his innate tendency to transcendence, he is on his way to higher levels, more sublime fulfillments, greater self-giving acts. Though he may have forsaken all superficial activity, deep, urgent action still remains."
- from " Mysticism" by Evelyn Underhill
Just thought I would throw that out there!
04:43 PM on 09/21/2010
Jesus Christ is Lord and Controls everything!
05:18 PM on 09/21/2010
Can he make a rock so heavy that even he can't pick it up ??
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Carbon Forteetoo
Not enough characters to say anything clev
11:05 PM on 09/22/2010
Who does God pray to?
01:03 PM on 09/21/2010
I believe part of the balance of the universe requires there to be winners/losers, action people/passive people, happy/sad etc. I think a very few can actually move from one side to the other without the benefit of an outside, big catalyst. I tend to wait for the universe to move me, since I don't know where to go, what to do or what I want to be happy. Gets harder with age. And if you're missing your estrogen, 'just do it' is sometimes impossible.
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Nelle
bah-weep-grahna-weep-ninny-bon
11:32 AM on 09/21/2010
In this economy, thought and action intersect where mounting bills meet a looming unemployment line.
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08:14 AM on 09/21/2010
The universe rewards the lucky. Those who make the most income in society do the least amount of work, but those trying to scrape a living out of the dust and briars work non-stop with no reward for action, other than sometimes survival, and even that is no guarantee.

There is no universal compassion, no universal reward system, it just is what it is. All animals have been programmed with cost benefit analysis. If the animal thinks doing nothing is best for survival, the animal does nothing. If the animals thinks odds are in in its favor after evaluating the environment, then the animal takes action.
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hempest
10:44 AM on 09/21/2010
The universe knows what you need better than you. Money is not the only reward in life.
05:28 PM on 09/22/2010
so the universe is a thinking entity of some kind that knows me personally and what is best for me?? even when i'm in the bathroom? that's supposed to be my alone time. what a creep.
07:48 AM on 09/21/2010
Ideas are the force that bind our universe. Thoughts are the essence of those ideas. The energy of thought is an action, perhaps the most powerful in the universe. Implementation of the ideas is binding them to perceptional forms of being. The manifest idea inspires others, which leads to progress. If only we lived in a culture that valued the individual growth of becoming better people instead of our ability to better behave as capitalists.
06:19 AM on 09/21/2010
I loved your clear description of the importance of action with positive attitude and spiritual practice. I've been a consultant and business coach for years, and also used to give talks on money as a medium for spiritual development. I also meditated daily for nearly 20 years, and do so less regularly now. I have always considered myself a spiritual person, but I realize more and more that I am not part of the very large group of people who somehow see being spiritual as enough. While I practiced positive thinking and even led workshops on these principles, I came to the conclusion that the ideas of positive thinking were holding more people than helping them. So now I'm writing a book on What Works When Positive Thinking Doesn't. I think you have nailed the problem, albeit briefly. Thoughts are really powerful when then are negative; they give us excuses for not doing what we want or should do. And positive ones have no power on their own. Anyone who has ever achieved anything knows that there are many other things at work: the 10,000 hours (Gladwell describes), focus on short term goals and achievement of them, playfulness, resilience, failure and on and on.

Lately I have been thinking that less thinking and more doing is actually more effective, both spiritually and materially. Just f--king do it is my moto. I liked your post and the title of it!

http://www.bruisedandbattered.com/blog/do-affirmations-work/
04:45 AM on 09/21/2010
Small note: Don't remember that quote in Orwell's 1984. What chapter is that from?
04:15 AM on 09/21/2010
Coming from a life lived with all thought and no action, action is key! Life should be lived more proactively instead of just in reponse. You come to a point in life where you see that many of those thoughts and dreams aren't going to come true because you sat around thinking about them instead of acting on them. Shoulda, woulda, coulda. Learn from this lesson, JUST DO IT!
01:34 AM on 09/21/2010
That is such wonderful insight, and I will get back to living in just a minute. :D
01:18 AM on 09/21/2010
Thought without action, action without thought. Neither way around makes much sense most of the time. Sometimes though things move too fast to fully rationalize an action and you must act by instinct, gut feeling, or extreme knowledge of yourself. Sometimes we must act irrationally, motivated by emotion, sometimes even selfishness. To take this day and devote it to yourself, to relax in whatever fashion suits you best. To step outside for a minute and calm down, or to take a break and watch Mythbusters. But logic doesn't fully pertain to these types of situations, but to when we have the time to judge a situation analytically. To think through our actions and to act on some of those thoughts is the only way to effectively pursue a goal. And we are judged not just on our success at that goal, but also by our ability to foresee the consequences of our actions and how we take responsibility for them. The only way to learn how to predict what consequences our actions will have is by acting and seeing what happens. We must learn not just how we work, how we think, how we react, what our instincts are, but we must also learn how we effect/affect the world and how we are affected/effected by it. Only then can we trust our instincts to guide us when we are not able to fully assess a situation. In order to succeed you must know thyself.
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Souldrifter
Newton's 3rd Law of Motion: Not just for physics.
12:52 AM on 09/21/2010
It's impossible to avoid your life. Whether you feel the need for a flurry of activity that causes you to constantly go out and seek stimulation, or you feel centered and zen about things and are content to ride along, making choices when they come... both ways are "living" and neither is invalid. I really wish people would stop trying to look for a silver bullet when it comes to living life. Everyone's different. No two lives are the same. What's right for one may not be best for another. Doesn't mean one way's better than the other. I figure... just worry about yourself and leave others to do the same. If someone comes asking for advice, I'll give it with a caveat: this works for me, but might not for you.
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AJOHMSS
11:46 PM on 09/20/2010
I avoid my life only because I owe it money.
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zapyourappetite
11:57 PM on 09/20/2010
Thanks for the laugh (about an all to familiar situation)!
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davidgoldmandg
01:22 AM on 09/21/2010
To do is to be. To be is to do. Doo-bee-doo-bee-doo!
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Marla Thurman
11:15 PM on 09/20/2010
Come on! You get good response so you write an article critiquing the good one? You can do better than that.
07:08 AM on 09/21/2010
Yeah! Let's talk some more about an article no one seems to care about!
WHY didn't anyone seem to care about it? Does it touch on a topic that people need to discuss but are afraid? Stuff like that!