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Fount of Blessing, Fount of Youth: Age and the American Church

Posted: 12/01/11 05:11 PM ET

I write this now because it will be too late to write later. Presently, I write as the mascot of a Christian community of which I would like to be a citizen. My skin is white and unwrinkled. I am healthy: 300 pounds plus on a bench press, three hours plus on a marathon route. I drink the trendiest coffee, listen to the trendiest music. I have the resources and desire to do these things. My spouse and I comprise that "young family" for which so many churches pine. If my spouse were to birth a child, or if we were to adopt a non-African-American child, our "young family" stock would skyrocket -- the political potency of potential potency. A son of the rural Midwest, an upwardly mobile migrant to the more urban and urbane east coast -- specifically, that place Wyclef Jean dubbed "The New Jerusalem" -- I am one in a long line of 33-year-old mascots of Christendom. The city on the hill contains such uplifting possibilities for 33-year-olds from the country.

Before my knees go, my favorite music gets archived and all of this starts sounding like sour grapes, I wish to contest my mascot status. American churches should stop fawning over young people like me. The fact that I and my demographic are so idealized bespeaks a profound, if often unintentional, ageism -- one that inhibits not only senior citizens' abilities to participate fully in the life of the church but mine as well. As long as I am the church's mascot, seniors cannot be citizens of the church -- and neither can I. It is time for American churches to grow up.

Let me say at the outset that the idealization of my demographic is due to more than age. Class, race, educational level and gender are pertinent, too. In some of the largest and loudest quadrants of American Christianity, I would be a less-likely candidate for mascot were I not straight, male, white, well-educated and middle-class. But the changes afoot in American Christianity portend at least some hope for individuals outside these demographics. It is increasingly fashionable for white Christians to put ourselves in safe proximity to brown faces. As American Christianity becomes increasingly brown -- and as safe proximity accidentally produces real encounters -- the whiteness will become less normative. It is even fashionable for white middle-class Christians to put ourselves in safe, beneficent proximity to poor people of all colors. If eventually our objects of charity assert their subjectivity without assimilating the values of their putative wardens, perhaps middle-class values will become less normative.

But it is not fashionable for churches to put themselves in proximity to old people. Seniors as such are not fashionable. They are not wanted -- as mascots or as citizens. Even the sentimental softness of the real or imagined kindly grandmother -- the avatar of the truly feminine in some Christian circles -- is severely qualified by the dogmatic hardness of the real or imagined "old church lady" -- the symbol of a stodgy religiosity that even most conservative evangelicals reject. Recently I came upon the website of an evangelical church that lampooned those moribund churches in which "everyone looks like your grandma," the implication being I would not be forced to pause over such post-menopausal specters were I to attend their worship service.

Few churches are so forthrightly ageist. More common would be this attitude: "It's not our intention to exclude seniors. Seniors are welcome. It just so happens that the music, the programming, the website, the latté bar in the vestibule, all trend toward the tastes and faces of youth and young families. This is our ministry." Claiming that seniors are not excluded from a church whose entire grammar "just so happens" to be middle-aged or younger is like claiming Chinese-only speakers are not excluded from a church where "it just so happens" only English is spoken. But it is a more bafflingly short-sighted claim in the case of old age because, barring unforeseen events, all of us are headed toward old age. One day, each of us who constructed our altars to youth will realize that we preemptively excommunicated the selves we were becoming from the tabernacles we were building.

Is there a remedy for this situation? There is not a simple one, and certainly not one that I can explore here as fully as I would like. But I believe the beginning of a remedy requires revisiting one conceptual category popular in the contemporary church: relevance. American churches like advertising themselves as "relevant to the culture." But we must push for specifics. To whom and for whom is our church relevant? Doubtless, the answer varies. But judging by their programming and congregational demographics, most churches that self-consciously adopt the discourse of relevance seem to have in mind people like me. Relevance to "the culture" usually means relevance to my culture -- to people who look like me, who spend money like me, who are reading this post on a sleek, colorless i-Device like the one on which I compose it, who soon and very soon might father a child who will inherit his father's uncritical consumptive habits and with this inheritance uncritically consume his father's aging, inconsequential body: teeth set on edge, the protestant patricide on the communion table of the free market.

This version of me, like the version of "the culture" of which it is representative and by which it is constituted, is largely lifeless -- inattentive, inorganic, juvenile, hypermaterialistic, ossified in its addiction to youth. Sure, I hope there is another version of my culture and myself that has more redeeming qualities -- and that sees that it needs to be led toward fuller redemption. But a community that claims a tradition that regards the marginal (the poor, the eunuch, the alien, the orphan, and ... the elderly widow) as supremely relevant should think twice before it seeks to build on such shifting sand as me -- the young, heterosexual, white male with disposable income and functioning genitals. It may turn out that it is irrelevant for the church to be relevant to such an irrelevant population.

There may be more relevant criteria for relevance. Some possibilities: A church with no wrinkles is irrelevant. A church that has not buried a member in the last two years or so is irrelevant. A church that advertises itself as "not your grandma's church" is irrelevant. A church that is staffed exclusively by guys who look they were pulled out of a Decemberists audience is irrelevant. A church that claims it must grow or die is irrelevant. Such a church is more irrelevant than poor, "dying" churches that cannot perpetuate themselves through time by birthing new members. After all, the ageless local congregation existing in earthly perpetuity is no less an illusion than is the ageless individual existing in earthly perpetuity. Imminent institutional mortality may better equip people to deal with eventual personal mortality. No robust Christianity can exist where death is absent. It is time for American churches to learn how to die.

While I believe Christian communities have a special duty to include and respect old people in their communions, I am not recommending the idealization of seniorhood solely for seniors' sakes. It will not do to replace young mascots with old ones. I believe the (re)turn toward old people is also necessary because young people need to be in community with people of different generations -- particularly the generations older than they are. If I am to be a citizen of my church rather than its mascot, I need to learn how to hold accountable and to be held accountable by other citizens with whom I may not identify immediately, with whom I may have serious disagreements traceable to generational differences. I need seniors, among others. Moreover, if I am to learn to be a senior citizen of a church one day, how else am I to acquire the habits of senior citizenship but by being in relationship with current seniors? Without these relationships, my Christianity and the Christian community I seek to build will falter. Christians idealize a Messiah who was killed, supposedly, at 33. American Christians may well end up killing the faiths of those idealized 33-year-olds in whom they place such messianic hope.

 
I write this now because it will be too late to write later. Presently, I write as the mascot of a Christian community of which I would like to be a citizen. My skin is white and unwrinkled. I am heal...
I write this now because it will be too late to write later. Presently, I write as the mascot of a Christian community of which I would like to be a citizen. My skin is white and unwrinkled. I am heal...
 
 
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06:03 PM on 12/08/2011
"It may turn out that it is irrelevant for the church to be relevant to such an irrelevant population."

Bravo, brother...I find your statement extemely relevant to the irrelevancy of the modern mega church mentality of youth relevance...well said.
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jokamachi
Dog on roof? Check. Scissors? Check.
03:22 PM on 12/05/2011
In fifty years when the majority of Americans are Hispanics, the majority of this nation will be Catholic. No more heartless protestantism where money equals salvation. We'll see true charity and concern for human life. And the political landscape will look quite different as well.
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JohnFromCensornati
The End is near
09:54 PM on 12/05/2011
LOL! Because "money equals salvation" protestantism has a palace in Rome!
08:26 PM on 12/04/2011
Multi-generational church is necessary to our health and survival.
11:21 PM on 12/03/2011
i think the Church in America is going to suffer great losses of population once this age of oldies die off. face it, the youths just DONT CARE anymore (and not necessarily about only church but everything and anything mature/important, even in the secular realm).
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syntax facit saltum
We do not live in a 2 story universe
11:57 PM on 12/03/2011
Our church has many young families as well as older people. And I know many young people who care deeply about many things in the world they live in-- religious or not.

Many Orthodox and Catholics are working together for unity. But there is a long history of mistrust starting with the Roman Catholic church excommunicating the Orthodox when the Orthodox objected to the Roman Catholic unilateral decision to add the Filioque to the Nicene Creed and when the Orthodox insisted the Roman Pope was a first among equals and not the supreme authority of the church. The schism that the Catholic excommunication started reached a point of irreconcilability when the Roman Catholic crusaders sacked and pillage Constantinople and stole the sacred art and relics of the Orthodox and took them back to the Vatican. In the recent past the former Pope returned some relics that had been stolen to the Orthodox, including the relics of St. John Chrysostom. The rejection of conciliarity by the Roman Catholics unleashed a torrent of schisms in the west so that now we have thousands of Protestant Christian sects, all stemming ultimately from the first Protestant schism under Luther. This complicated history requires a lot of prayers and good will to overcome.
01:36 PM on 12/04/2011
The Catholics are not to be faulted. Rome existed first. Constantinople tried to exalt itself on secular grounds.
12:56 AM on 12/04/2011
The new youth do not care!....why?

As transportation became available people moved away. All the mentors left the neighborhoods. Professionals ......like school teachers, lawyers, Dr., School Principals, bankers, Store owners they all left.

And as the Civil Rights came to be. The other sector of professionals left those neighborhoods also.

Who is left?
01:37 PM on 12/04/2011
I have no idea where you either are going with this or coming from. But i know one thing: the youth needs a wake up call.
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gneep
if it wasn't always the same, it'd be different
07:18 PM on 12/03/2011
it should be ILLEGAL to teach religion to children.
11:16 PM on 12/03/2011
duh, religion is a part of life. teaching them concepts is not the same as forcing their wills one way or another.
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jokamachi
Dog on roof? Check. Scissors? Check.
03:24 PM on 12/05/2011
Another bitter atheist. Good thing the 5th amendment protects us from your kind of intolerance. Now go back to your belief in nothing and let the rest of us enjoy the holidays.

Oh, and Merry Christmas!!!!
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Hillbilly49
Don't tell me you are a Christian; let me guess.
01:59 PM on 12/03/2011
It took me almost to the age of sixty to realize what a scam religion truly is; the freedom from religion is one of the best freedoms one can enjoy, even if it occurs late in life.
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jokamachi
Dog on roof? Check. Scissors? Check.
03:25 PM on 12/05/2011
You got played, how sad for you. Religion gives me great happiness. Suck on that.

Oh, and Merry Christmas!!!
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syntax facit saltum
We do not live in a 2 story universe
11:18 PM on 12/02/2011
As an Eastern Orthodox Christian I have to say this article presents a Christianity that is totally outside the realm of my experience.
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Rev David Huber
A non-progressive mind is a wasted mind.
12:40 PM on 12/02/2011
A powerful testimony - thank you! Too many churches, esp. the mega-church "entrepreneurial pastor" movement is definitely worshiping the idol of youth at the altar of consumerist American capitalism and militarism.

What I like about my church is that the folks span a range of under 1 year old to just turned 102. The older people know the children by name. The children know the older people by name. The middle-aged and the young adults know everyone and are known. Our different ages sit together at meals, at quilting, and in worship. They work together at fund raisers, and they pray for one another. The older folks pass down their wisdom to the newly married or recent parents. The young folks try to teach the elders how to use their electronics and new music. It is really something to behold, and one of the great advantages of a small church: people actually know each other and can care for one another in love and compassion.
April Dancer 25
The Girl From U.N.C.L.E.
08:40 AM on 12/02/2011
I think it should be pointed out that that photo is of a Catholic Church. See the Stations of the Cross? They don't exist in Protestant churches.
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quivira
10:37 AM on 12/02/2011
They do in Episcopal churches.
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Rev David Huber
A non-progressive mind is a wasted mind.
12:45 PM on 12/02/2011
Episcopalians aren't part of Protestantism, they come from the Anglican church - which was a separation from the Catholic Church, but not as part of the Protestant Reformation, just because the King wanted a divorce. They consider themselves a sort of "middle way" between Catholic and Protestantism.

Though some will say that they are, others will say that they are not. And in a general sense of "everyone who isn't Catholic is Protestant", they are Protestant. But they were never part of the Reformation movement, and so aren't any more Protestant than the Orthodox Church or the many other branches of Catholicism.
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02:40 AM on 12/02/2011
Look at all these old people... look at them sitting idly, opening their story books. Look at them ignore the world around them. hunger, fascism, torture, genocide? As long as the organ is playing, and their preacher is smiling down on them, they're happy.

the rest of the world can burn, burn, burn. they're going to heaven with baby jesus.
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Calyndula
I Hug Trees...
09:29 AM on 12/02/2011
This old person feels nothing that you describe. I feel lucky to be able to give to, and work in, food banks, take up causes, work for the betterment of humanity, ponder the very atrocities you discuss. Religion and awareness are not separate. This is a very ignorant statement.
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Hillbilly49
Don't tell me you are a Christian; let me guess.
02:04 PM on 12/03/2011
Most food banks are sponsored by governments or liberal churches. Rarely will an evangelical church be involved in something that helps out their fellow man or animal.
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Rev David Huber
A non-progressive mind is a wasted mind.
12:50 PM on 12/02/2011
Oh, I don't know - many of those old people fought a world war and were social activists and did many other things to combat fascism, torture, genocide, and hunger, and raised the kids that are working to end such things now. Or they built our freeways, engineered our airplanes and cargo ships and factories, invented our medical devices and surgical techniques, grew our food, fought for pollution control, and invented the computer, the Internet, and GPS.

Maybe they have earned the right to sit back and enjoy a book. Many of them are tired.
researcher
researcher
01:34 AM on 12/02/2011
the churches I visit as part of my on going research into beliefs and the human mind I find some interesting things. most churches are filled with seniors. something happens to many when they reach about 50 years of age.

many of course have been raised in the church and dont have any thoughts outside what their churches have taught them. if they were raised in a muslim nation they would make good muslims, same with buddists, hindus, jews, etc.

I also find it interesting if they think you are one of them and share their beliefs you are very welcome but question their beliefs and you soon will be an outcast. the same conditions of course are with the atheists and all religions and politics.

we like those around us that think and believe like us. like attracts like. I also find most of these seniors very rigid in their beliefs and very selfish but often praise themselves for their unselfishness. fox news is fox news because of these seniors.

I believe that a capitalist ideology will create such a selfish society. it is a "your are on your own I got mine mentality".

systems have a profound effect on a society and its beliefs. example: america has an industrial military complex system that has conditioned americans to think nothing of spending 40% of their federal budgets decade after decade on military spending even while poverty is becoming rampant in america.
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07:22 AM on 12/02/2011
I agree with you but America is not a Capitalist country.
It's a Corporate Kleptocracy.
The Medical Industrial Complex is sucking even more money than the military.
Of course they own All the media not just FOXNews.
So they will give us "Hope and Change" and then put their Wall Street minions in charge of the money and have their corporations declared 'people' by the Supreme Court.
There's nothing we can do about it because they trashed the public schools and dumbed down the electorate so much that the people actually think their vote counts.
So now our Overlords keep pumping the 'old tyme religion' from the brand new 'mega-church' and tell you there's no climate change because it's cold outside.
But hey that new flat screen is selling for below cost at Walmart on Black Friday.
Religion.
It's what America turns to while their pocket is being picked.
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09:08 AM on 12/04/2011
Jung's answer was that at 50 we change from acquisition to contemplative.
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dpkjj
Peace on Earth
12:20 AM on 12/02/2011
God bless you for saying this. We seniors in our church have been so marginalized it is pathetic. We still staff the thrift shop, the altar guild, the choir, the quilting group, and so many of the other groups that make the church run. But, when it comes to making real decisions, like the money or choosing a new pastor, we have been iced out. The brochure that was prepared as part of the process of screening candidates for the new pastor referred more than once to the "problem of our aging demographic."

I do not see myself as a "problem." I am in my seventies, but a vital, healthy, active, contributing member of my secular and my church community. Many of my peers feel the same way.

It is all about institutional survival and money, of course. (Even though the largest endowments come from the older people.)

It is good to know that at least one young person appreciates our contribution.
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07:24 AM on 12/02/2011
It's all marketing.
Old folks simply have fewer years left to pay into the system.
Unless they are replaced by fresh meat the church goes belly up.
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WESmith
12:12 PM on 12/02/2011
"The Church" is unimportant. This is hard to visualize by people who see everything through money and property. Most older people get fulfillment through giving of themselves. Money is the offering from those that don't want to be bothered, but still want the reward. The ironic thing is, there is no charge for the heavenly reward. There is a balance in life. Everything in nature is in an equilibrium. Many people see life in texting. Many people see life in working hard. Many people see life in never working. Many people see life in helping others. Many people see life in helping themselves. Without balance, there is skewed vision.
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Robert Frano
Religio_Intolerance cost 359 coworkers! (11.09.01)
12:20 PM on 12/02/2011
Re: "Unless they are replaced by fresh meat the church goes belly up." {NHBill}.

I believe the technical term to refer to these vanishing-intolerants is that they, 'Self-Darwinise'...
April Dancer 25
The Girl From U.N.C.L.E.
08:38 AM on 12/02/2011
I remember a pastor I had thanking the "Blue-Haired Brigade" specifically because, he said, without those ladies, we would not have a parish.
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dpkjj
Peace on Earth
03:09 PM on 12/02/2011
Thank you;. So true. I would love to call a stop-work for a week or two for all the over-60s. The church would stop functioning. I am so glad you have a pastor who totally appreciates that and voices it.
12:17 AM on 12/02/2011
Christianity can attract more youthful followers if it starts to make sense. I don't know how they're going to manage that, what with being based on the revealed wisdom of holy scripture.

Some ideas just go out of style.
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WESmith
12:26 PM on 12/02/2011
The ideas of respect, love, loyalty and purpose are totally different now than in my parents days, out of style. A simple hand shake was more binding then than a signature with collateral is now. When I retired none of the younger people were working for the company. They were working for their career, with the company being a stepping stone. People value quantity over quality.
Which is right and which is wrong? The idea behind Christianity is to be servants. The idea behind the US Bill of Rights is affording everyone else their rights These ideas have indeed gone out of style. We want to be on top and everyone else abide by our desires. We only speak of "MY Rights." Same with Traffic Safety Laws. "Gee, I am sorry they are dead but I had the Right of Way." No Traffic Safety Law ever gives anyone the right of way. Responsibility is what they owe me, those evil corporations and rich people. Punishing them (and giving us the proceeds) will save the world. Just a new religion.
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eddy joe
welcome to the machine
08:43 PM on 12/01/2011
It "just so happens" that he would not be appreciated in any legitimate church. He has no modesty. He is not humble. He is not meek. Requirements of a christian.
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07:25 AM on 12/02/2011
and a good Corporate Consumer.
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eddy joe
welcome to the machine
07:36 AM on 12/02/2011
LOL...Something required , and taught to us all. Not many escape it. Are you one that did?
07:51 PM on 12/01/2011
Our church has a real good mixture of young and old. But mostly old. The Word brings us all together. Different lives. Different politics. One Lord.

Last evening we heard an excellent quote (an Advent quote) from Bonhoeffer in this short (under 12 min.) but well needed Advent sermon:

http://theoldadam.wordpress.com/2011/12/01/a-great-advent-quote-from-bonhoeffer/


Enjoy...and pass along.