THE BLOG

Will You Be The Girl Who Is Single Forever?

06/26/2015 12:05 pm ET | Updated Jun 24, 2016

Dating can be very frustrating. You spend time, money and emotional energy trying to find "The One" and most of the time you wind up being disappointed. Then, you have to go back to the drawing board, hoping that the next one will be better. This makes you wonder why you are still single when most of your friends have figured out how to make it to the marriage promised-land?

If you want to be the next single gal to cross the finish line, you need to take a hard look at yourself and your dating situation and make some drastic improvements. That is not to say that the men are perfect in their dating habits because they are not. However, you need to be accountable for your own actions and put your right foot forward. Keep in mind that Noah's ark was 2 by 2 and in our society, most people who truly want to get married, actually get married.

Here are 10 questions to consider if you want to determine if you are a girl who is destined to be single forever. If a lot of these resonate for you, it's time to make some real changes, so you can get yourself married.

Are you the only one of your girlfriends who is still single? If you are, you need to ask yourself what your friends did that you aren't doing when it's comes to dating and make some changes.

Do you have a list of dating rules that a man must follow or you won't give him a chance (even though most of them are outdated and irrelevant to whether or not he will make a good husband and partner) ? If you are a "Rules" girl, and spend more time noticing if he calls you 5 days before a date to ask you out, rather than noticing the kind of man he is and the kind of father he will be, break the habit.

Do you tell yourself that you don't care if you ever get married, but, in reality you cry yourself to sleep over it? Stop rationalizing. You want to get married, get yourself married. Remember how you got an "A" in school when you really worked hard for it or how you got that promotion at work that you wanted? Do the same thing with your dating.

Do you choose to only hang out with your married friends? I know you love your married friends and you definitely should spend time with them. However, you also MUST find single friends with whom to go out so you might actually have the opportunity to meet a guy.

Do you refuse to online date or use dating apps even though everyone does it and you are hurting for dates? I know you think that online dating and dating apps are "just not for you." However, if you are single and truly want to get married, you really don't have the luxury to say that. Go check out some of the newer apps like mine, The Dating Lounge, and jump in.

Do you make excuses about why you are single instead of taking responsibility for your part in it? Excuses are just excuses. Stop with the excuses and figure out what YOU can do differently to get different dating results.

Do you blame the men, your job, the city you live in, your parents, anyone and everything for your "singleness," instead of thinking about what you can do differently? Stop blaming everyone else. Blame yourself for a change. Come up with 4 things you could change about your dating and try making one change, every week for the next 4 weeks and see what happens. I bet you will see results.

Are you set in your ways about your life and are not willing to bend at all? When you are trying to get married, you do not have the time to be set in your ways. Relationships and marriage take a lot of compromising. So, choose 2 things you won't bend on and then decide to be flexible about everything else (think about getting rid of your need for the dishes to go in the dishwasher the moment they hit the sink and other things like that.)

Are you of the mindset that you have waited this long for Mr. Right, you might as well wait for perfection instead of being realistic? There is no such thing as perfection. I don't care how long you have been looking for Mr. Right. If you give up looking for Mr. Perfect, you will actually open up the space to find My Perfect "for you."

Do you never give a man a chance because you have a laundry list of "must-haves" which creates unrealistic expectations? When you are single, you need to be realistic. You need to be looking for a mortal human being instead of Mr. Fantasy. Review your list of "deal-breakers" and remove anything with which you can live without. If you do this, your dating world will immediately become filled with infinitely more possibilities.

What other things are indicators that a woman will be single forever?

Samantha Daniels is a well-known Professional Matchmaker and Dating Expert as well as the founder of The Dating Lounge, the exclusive invitation-only iPhone dating app for upscale people looking for real relationships. You can follow her on Twitter @Matchmakersd. For more information, go to www.SamanthaDaniels.info