Unplug and Recharge: 5 Steps to Overcoming Anxiety

The summer after I graduated from college I headed off to fulfill a dream -- I traveled solo through Europe for two months. Sauntering on Parisian streets; sipping vino in Italy; snuggling under down comforters in Switzerland and Austria; and noshing on pastries in Belgium, and Prague -- I was finally free of all the obligations that my schooling had entailed and was embarking on the path of my adult life.

At least that's how things seemed on the outside.

What I actually felt on the inside was a whole other story. Before I had left the United States, I was diagnosed with the early stage of cervical cancer. This left me scared, anxious, and not knowing how to relate to myself or my new reality. Riddled with anxiety, each train I caught to the next exotic city felt less like a dream-come- true and more like I was simply running away from that unsavory, fluttery feeling in my solar plexus. If I just kept moving, I thought, maybe I could outrun it.

Boy, was I wrong. The thing is, my attempt to run away from myself is not uncommon. It's human nature. How else could we have survived as a species for as long as we have? It's the fight or flight syndrome in action -- only now we face less external obstacles to our well-being (when was the last time you hunted for your food or fended off an enemy?) and more and more internal ones (self criticism, workaholism, addictions, and worry, to name a few).

Luckily, just after gallivanting through Europe, I moved to Thailand to work. There, I was immersed in the abiding calm of Buddhism, the national religion. I attended my first 10-day meditation retreat and started a daily sitting practice. Little by little, I expanded my capacity to observe my thoughts, feelings, and bodily sensations--to feel and accept them, rather than run from, change, or control them. This was truly my first step to inner peace; and today this practice, coupled with yoga, forms the backbone of my life.

That's why I am so passionate about sharing what I have learned with others. Yet, often those new to meditation feel intimidated by it. They think: how can I ever stop my thoughts? All this is doing is showing me just how crazy I really am!

The thing is, meditation is not about stopping your thoughts. It's about being with them compassionately. Noticing them. Giving them space to be what they are without acting on them or getting entangled in their enticing stories. Then, gradually, when stronger storms of emotions arise, you have strengthened the "witness" part of yourself--she who sits and watches, rather than reacts. You are able to see the thoughts and feelings in your body that accompany your emotions. Then something like fear or anxiety actually becomes interesting and dynamic, rather than scary parts of yourself that you need to shove into a dark, internal corner of yourself.

One caveat: there is no magical solution! Difficult emotions never go away -- they are part of the human experience -- but, by engaging in the practice below over time, they can lessen and soften as you grow your capacity to relate to them with loving kindness and non-judgmental awareness.

To get you started, here are five steps to help you befriend your anxiety through meditation and breath:

1. GET COMFORTABLE. Take a comfortable seat, either on the floor or in a chair. Be sure that your spine is extended and your chest is open. (Remember that you can do this anywhere--on the bus, the airplane, etc). Consciously let your body relax and sink into the support beneath you, whether that be a cushion or a chair. Soften.

2. NOTICE YOUR BREATH. Now, turn your attention to your breathing--without trying to change it (sure it will change a little once you become aware of it). Does it feel deep? Shallow? Where do you feel it in your body? What parts of your body aren't receiving the breath? Is your inhale longer or shorter than your exhale? Do this for a few minutes. Notice the changing nature of your breath.

3. BECOME CURIOUS. Since your breath is the vehicle of embodiment, you might find that now it is easier for you to feel what's actually happening in your body. Be inquisitive about it, like a child seeing something for the first time. Ask yourself, what does this feel like? What temperature is the sensation? Where is it? Is it moving? If so, how quickly? Does it feel hard, soft, sharp, pulsing, what? Again, stay with it for some time, in each moment, feeling it, then naming it.

4. WITNESS AND PARTICIPATE. Now, if dominating thoughts come into your mind--judgments, fears, worries, or stories associated with your anxiety, notice what they are. See them like you would see words or images on a movie screen. Don't engage with them, witness them. Then, if a strong bodily sensation arises, return to feeling and labeling that. See what calls your attention most strongly and attend to it in the moment. If your body needs to move or if you need to make a sound during this, let that happen, too. Witness and participate without judgment.

5. ACKNOWLEDGE CHANGE. After some time -- whether it be two minutes, ten minutes, or one hour, conclude your meditation by feeling your breath once again. Let yourself re-soften into your surroundings. Now ask yourself, how am I feeling? What are the sensations in my body? More likely than not, you'll see how your state has shifted since you first sat down.

Let this experience remind you that you are NOT your feelings, you are NOT your thoughts, you are NOT your anxiety -- you are that wise, loving, underlying presence that feels and observes without preference or judgment. Return to your day illuminated by the remembrance that you can abide in this presence whenever you choose to.

For a free audio download of this guided meditation practice to help overcome anxiety, click here

To read more from Sara, visit her website.

 

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Comments

[lungfish]

I think meditation is great to keep anxiety at bay. I practice breathwork daily (I am a professional freediver- I dive deep without Scuba tanks) and I try to be mindful. Yet, there are times when anxiety literally paralyzes me. I get to a point where I can't function. I am unable to meet obligations, self motivate, even eating becomes impossible. I stop talking with others, my dreams become nightmares... Fears. Fears about money, security, stability, the opinions of others, my opinions of myself... the physical side is a large and very uncomfortable sense of stress in my abdomen. I try to breathe through it but it is so large and uncomfortable that I can't engage it or put it off.
I go out to sea, alone, and can feel this stress eating at my performance levels. I can't focus on the dives. I breathe, I do pranayama type patterns, I try to integrate with the water and the effort at hand. But the stress sensation continues. I try to lose myself in the moment, etc.. be mindful of now, all the rest but it isn't quite enough.
I rationalize. I know I am not in real danger. I know that "this too will pass". I try everything but it isn't enough....

[SiddhaliShree]

As a monk, I have come across many who have experienced anxiety. One easy tip, to add to this helpful meditation article by Sara, is the practice of awareness and being in the present moment.
It is the mind that bothers us, that moves between past and future, contributes to worries, and unrelaxed state of being. If a person reminds themselves to be in the present (or easily become aware of their breath), they move towards the present, thus not being affected by the mind's contributions of worry, past and future, etc. The real meditation means to be 100% in the present. By being in the present moment, a person becomes more healthy and relaxed. For more on meditation and spirituality, please visit my spiritual/­meditation blog at http://siddhalishree.com. Best!

[Antacid]

Meditation: for people who have to be taught how to procrastinate. (notthatth­ere'sanyth­ingwrongwi­thprocrast­inating)

[tlgeiger62]

Thanks for this Sara. I've often wanted to 'learn' meditation and your detail on what should be happening throughout the process is very helpful. I don't typically find this kind of info in the 'how to' articles. I've had panic and anxiety disorder since I was 18 (now 47) and am dealing with so much more these days than is typical of my life thus far (unemployment, ruin, etc.) and need to find something that will help me now that I don't have the meds any more (lost the insurance).

Thank you most sincerely.

[calfacon]

I'm having trouble with this part:
"Be sure that your spine is extended and your chest is open. (Remember that you can do this anywhere--on the bus, the airplane, etc). " Crunched in, standing on BART . . .

[Sara Avant Stover - Huffpost Blogger]

Hi there,
Yes, I see how that can be confusing. What I mean is that, even when I'm sitting in the car, on the subway, in a tiny airplane seat, I can still sit up tall and plant my feet on the floor. This helps to open up my breath and bring more clarity to my mind. Of course, you do the best you can if the situation is not idea. The important thing is that you don't think that you CAN'T do it, just because you are in a hectic or less-than-ideal environment.
I hope that helps!
Blessings,
Sara

[khanti]

Excellent blog. You have put meditation in the right perspective. Ms Sara , do you know that when you are an observer to your consciousness and emotions that appears the moment you stop thinking you are actually letting karma take effect by letting the karmic energy dissipate away. By being just an observer you are doing it in a controlled enviroment. by not amplifying it or recycling it.
There are many writers in HuffPo on the meditation subject every one knows it is good but do not know why it works. A deeper practice of meditation is to develop insight into the cause of our unhappiness by back tracking from within into the cause of our duka and not blame others. After all the Buddha's teachings are to elevate us from the condition of suffering. We do unjustice to the Buddha if we do apply his teachings. We are the cause of our own problems so we have to solve it ourself. It is not about blaming ourselves or others just be practical and solve it.

[Sara Avant Stover - Huffpost Blogger]

Yes, Khanti. I agree-insight is crucial for transformation!