When I graduated college in 2009, I had this naive idea that I would instantly be flooded with good job offers. Now I just laugh at my young 21-year-old self. Instead, I left North Carolina (where I went to college) and moved back home to Massachusetts. I spent the next six months crying, applying for jobs and working in a miserable retail job.
I finally decided maybe I needed to give up and reevaluate things. I realized I was young, I had no responsibilities, and the whole world was open to me. This was my chance to spend a year volunteering (something I had always wanted to do). I could try the whole job search thing again in a year.
I came across a website for a community for adults with disabilities located in a valley surrounded by the Blue Ridge mountains in Virginia. This community was looking for live-in volunteers to commit a year of their time. I went down for a few days to visit and I fell in love with it all. Just imagine a beautiful valley filled with people that have the most positive outlook on life.
A week later I received a good job offer as a Public Relations manager at a small nonprofit company. I had to decide between a good job and volunteering in Virginia. Despite urging from my family and friends, I chose to volunteer.
Two months later, in January, I filled my dad's car and moved. I was placed in a house with two other volunteers and five adults with various physical and mental disabilities. It wasn't always easy being 22 and in charge of people's lives, but I fell in love with all of them. The people I lived with made it worth it.
I mean could this place be anymore beautiful?
My time in Virginia was the best of my life. It's easy to say that, but let me explain what I mean. I had never before been filled with a feeling that I wanted the ultimate best for everyone. I think this is a feeling that only comes when you are completely content with yourself. In Virginia, I felt that. I was completely in love with life and everyone around me.
I remember being in Boston on a visit back home and striking up a conversation with a homeless guy. He said to me, "Why are you being so nice and talking to me? Nobody talks to me." I didn't know what to say because at that point in my life it just felt natural to be happy and talk to everyone.
In July of that year, a few new volunteers came from Germany. By the winter, I fell in love with one of them, Thomas. His visa was only good for a year, so not long after we got together we were forced to make some big decisions about life.
It's a bit crazy to talk about marriage after three months of being together, but that is what we had to do. If we stayed in the U.S. that was our best option. I was (and still am) obsessed with him, so I offered to move to Germany. I figured that was a better option than getting married. Although looking back it was really crazy to move to a country I had never been to for a guy I had been with for a few months.
It's been almost five years since I left the U.S. I spent over four years with Thomas in Germany teaching English and traveling all over Europe. About six months ago we decided it was time for the next adventure and started looking for a new (warmer) place to move. We now live in sunny Costa Rica and we love it.
My life did not turn out the way I expected. I always planned on having that good job, a house, and kids. Looking back I realize that was never the life I wanted, just the life I felt that I was expected to have. This life, the one filled with deep love and new adventures, is the perfect life.
So, if you're unsure about that gap year adventure or a job, I say go for the gap year every time. There will always be another job waiting for you, but the experience of a lifetime should come first.