Huff Post Review - GI Joe: The Rise of Cobra (2009)
GI Joe: The Rise of Cobra
2009
118 minutes
Rated PG-13
by Scott Mendelson
GI Joe: The Rise of Cobra is a movie that remembers the very basics that so many big-budget action films have forgotten. The action scenes are creative and cleanly edited with a clear sense of time, space, and geography. While there is plenty of CGI vehicle destruction, there are also plenty of real stunts and real rough-and-tumble fight scenes. The heroes are engaging and distinguishable amidst the carnage, and the villains are appropriately colorful and entertaining. At its best, the film resembles what adventures you might create if you took your action figure playsets and gave them a $175 million budget to work with. And yes, I mean that as a compliment.
A token amount of plot - Following a prologue set in France in 1641 (no kidding...), the film opens in that oh-so-convenient 'not-so distant future'. Duke (Channing Tatum) and Ripcord (Marlon Wayans) are entrusted with delivering a new 'nanobot' weapon created by arms merchant McCullen (a terrifically scenery-chewing Christopher Eccleston). Little do they know that the Scottish Tony Stark is playing both sides, and they are soon ambushed by a terrorist organization bent on stealing the weapon for their own nefarious purposes. At the last minute, rescue comes in the form on an elite group of international fighting men and women. Known only as GI Joe, the group prevents the theft and whisks our heroes to safety. Duke and Ripcord use Duke's prior knowledge of The Baroness (Siena Miller) to gain admittance into this top-secret organization. Can the Joes stop this mysterious terrorist network from using the nanobot technology to settle a four-hundred year-old vendetta, or will McCullen and his venomous plans lead the world to destruction?
Look, none of this is intended to be high art, but the film mostly works in ways that Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen could only dream about. The difference is that this adaptation from a popular 80s toy line actually gives moviegoers what they came to see. Rather than pad a few action beats with overly contrived exposition, crude ethnic stereotypes, and vulgar sexual slapstick, director Stephen Summers stays strictly business for most of the film's brisk 118-minute running time. You want a film about bad ass GI Joes facing off against the organization that will eventually become Cobra? That's exactly what you get. You want memorable villains and square-jawed heroes? You've got at least half a dozen notable heroes and at least five representatives of evil (which is key to having an exciting action scene, so you always have someone familiar to cut to). You want high adventure and action scenes that give you stunts that you've never seen before? There's a 10-15 minute chase scene through Paris, the only one involving those infamous 'accelerator suits', that is absolutely breathtaking both in its logistics and its narrative logic. Yes the collateral damage in this scene is astonishing, but I never cared about innocent bystanders when I played with my action figures either. Frankly, the picture is every bit as violent, gruesome, and as corpse-ridden as the action dramas I mapped out when I was ten-years old, which makes me shocked that it got a PG-13.
Considering the source material, the plot makes a surprising amount of sense, give or take a few minor plot holes (it helps that the storyline is as simple as possible). While the film is mainly bereft of clever dialogue, it also wins points for not trying to be particularly witty or self-satisfyingly clever. These are adults who deal in the business of death, and they only crack wise when they need a distraction from the bullets or explosions. While the film doesn't particularly take itself seriously, it also refuses to wink a the audience. While no one in the cast will put this at the top of their highlight reel, only Sienna Miller and Channing Tatum offer what might be called mediocre performances. Most refreshing is the treatment of the female characters. While both Scarlett (Rachel Nichols) and the Baroness are acknowledged as very attractive women, they neither give or receive special treatment in the action scenes. Both inflict and take severe punishment and Summers never does the whole 'wow, it's girls kicking ass... how progressive!' bit that so many others stoop to.
There are four major action set-pieces, and each one both moves the plot along and gives each major character a specific purpose and role. Unlike other ensemble films where the big star got most if not all of the major action beats (think Mission: Impossible 3 or The Kingdom), every Joe and every 'not-yet-Cobra' villain gets various highlight moments. You get ninja duels (Snake Eyes and Storm Shadow go at it several times), crossbow shoot-outs, fights to the death above high precipices, vehicle chases, and everything else you want to see in a movie like this. Unfortunately, the kinetic blast that carries the film right up to the climax is undone by a screenwriting trap that cannot be plausibly be written out of. First of all, there is a lack of suspense in the climax, as we are given several heroes and villains who more or less cannot be killed for the sake of the eventual sequel. Furthermore, the token attempt at back story creates a quagmire that causes several increasingly stupid climactic revelations. This climaxes in the neutering of a major fan-favorite character that will likely infuriate hardcore fans.
But for at least that initial ninety-minutes or so, the movie is an effective action-adventure spectacle. This is absolutely a GI Joe movie in the sense that the kid in us only dreamed about seeing onscreen. It works despite its flaws and inherent silliness. It's fun, exciting, occasionally eye-popping, and completely entertaining. It has great actors (Christopher Eccleston, Jonathan Pryce, Dennis Quaid) hamming it up and inventive action scenes that are worth seeing on a big screen. How can you not love a movie that casts famous Brit Jonathan Pryce as the President of the United States and lets him keep his accent? But in a movie like this, getting the action adventure basics just right is half the battle right there. I think you can guess what the other 50% is.
Grade: B
To see how this tent-pole compares to the other summer action spectacles, such as X-Men Origins: Wolverine, Star Trek, Terminator Salvation, Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen, or Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince, check out Mendelson's Memos.
Follow Scott Mendelson on Twitter: www.twitter.com/ScottMendelson
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Great --- more entertainment designed for 9 year old boys ----SPLOSIONS! COOOOL!
In all seriousness, movies like this set the studios' bottom lines so they can afford to underwrite loss-leader arthouse flicks. George Clooney got to do GOOD NIGHT AND GOOD LUCK because he did OCEAN'S THIRTEEN.
An independent movie that makes several times its
budget or an action movie that once you factor in advertising barely makes twice as much? In Hollywood, that isn't 'profit'.
When will Action Jackson finally get his own film?
When God, when?
http://www
You were saying?
How about Major Matt Mason? Or Big Jim and his Country Camper? Now those were Action Heroes!
Major Matt Mason, Action Jackson, Stretch Armstrong.
What about Ken? Barbie gets all the movies, music and merchandise lines and Ken doesn't even get a last name. What up with that?
I had planned to pass on this movie, but I might have to check it out. I have no problem with movies that know what they are and are true to it. Now if someone would only adapt Exosquad and Ghost in the Machine...
I had a problem with the basic premise - why should the US sent soldiers around the world, to stop the bad guys, like they did back in 70's? Shouldn't we leave the rest of the world to solve its problems?
WE have trouble governing ourselves, let alone the remainder of the world. It is too big. It is okay to let someone else take care of the bad guys.
It's based on a set of action figures, not Noam Chomsky or Ron Paul speeches about the pitfalls of American military adventurism. It's also a feature film, not a documentary.
I assumed he wasn’t being serious there... although a Noam Chomsky action film now that you mention it.....
Maybe you missed the part about it being an international anti-terrorism unit, comprised "The best of the best" special-ops personnel from 23 countries.
Has anyone noticed how we get more a more excited and loyal fan base for good TV shows than movies now?
I love HBO's True Blood and NBC's Kings, and passionately miss Battlestar Galactica.
That might have to do with TV shows being able to go farther and deeper into stuff than a two-hour movie can.
True Blood - I'm totally hooked. Better than most vampire movies I've seen and better than anything else on TV.
God, I miss Battlestar Galactica! :(
Frak!
Waiting, waiting, for Caprica!
Where can I begin to critique this movie...
First bad casting...
The film went on too long...and very violent...
Rename the film, "G.I. DUDE"
Marlon Wayans. The Black guy is Marlon Wayans. Recognize!
And he wasn't buffoonish. He just had a sense of humor. My idea of a buffoon(of course I'm going to look up the exact definition after typing this) is someone who lacks intelligen
And, yeah, Tatum Channing sucked majorly!
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Marlon Wayans was buffoonish? He may have been less of a straight-arrow than Tatum or Quaid, but he was never presented as anything less than an expert marksman, a top-notch pilot, and a relatively intelligent puzzle-cracker. Sure he cracked jokes and hit on his teammate, but even his flirtations were respectful and he wins over said teammate not by macho bravado but by showing empathy and professionalism under fire. And, (SPOILER) as far as him being a sideshow, he kinda saves the world in the film's climax. While Duke and Snake Eyes are off pursuing personal vendettas, Ripcord is the one who actually stops the evil plan and saves millions of lives.
Are there any explosions? If so, I'd trace the cause to using a non-licensed electrician.
SOT
Or you could check out whether they installed a gas water heater without using a licensed plumber.
I saw the movie and i liked it. You get what you want in this movie. It was god entertainment anf frankly i liked it better than the transformers. Much better. Well..mayb
"god entertainment" - you can't get much higher priase than that!
"Better than Transforme
Now that says it all.
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This was the rare franchise starter that I actively want to see a sequel for. And, should Summers get another crack at the bat, he'd better find a spot for Oded Fehr in one of the two teams.
The damn thing plays like the first draft was written by eight year olds.
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