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Seth Shostak

Seth Shostak

Posted: January 6, 2011 05:43 PM

Alien Vaporware

What's Your Reaction:

The report, if true, was important.

According to a story posted at Examiner.com, and unhesitatingly picked up by Pravda and a slew of sketchy websites, scientists at SETI (the Search for Extraterrestrial Intelligence) have found three objects the size of Delaware entering the solar system. This flotilla of bright blue craft is apparently making a beeline to Earth. The report says you should expect it to make landfall in 2012 -- a year already fraught with menace.

Now let's face it: The discovery of a fleet of alien craft (what else could they be?) seemingly intent on an unauthorized visit to terra firma sounds vaguely worthy of mention on the nightly news. But the mainstream media has decided you aren't interested: The story has been published only in parts of the world you need shots to visit.

This is clearly a hoax, an assessment I wearily give to the many e-mail correspondents who have written me on the matter. Is it true, they anxiously ask, that Earth will be hosting alien house guests of uncertain temperament?

No. What's more, this hoax is low grade, easily unmasked by anyone wielding modest technical talents, or just a bit of journalistic fortitude. For example, the incoming objects were observed in the direction of the south celestial pole (and "beyond Pluto," if that helps you). But they were discovered, according to alleged SETI astrophysicist Craig Kasnov, with an instrument called HAARP -- the U.S. government's High Frequency Active Auroral Research Program. The HAARP antenna array is real, but it's in Alaska, a place from which it's said you can see Russia, but never the south celestial pole. So that's like espying Antarctica from a ship near Greenland.

If that doesn't move you, there's also the small point that HAARP is both unsuited for, and has never been used by, any SETI experiment. Oh, and SETI astrophysicist Craig Kasnov doesn't exist.

This small fantasy is more than an amusing curiosity, however. It's not the first time that internet stories have appeared suggesting that some SETI experiment has tuned in the aliens. And of course it won't be the last. But these tantalizing tales are more than a nuisance.

Some of them are -- like the present story -- deliberate fictions, intended to amuse or confuse. Others are simple misunderstandings by reporters.

But either way, there's a certain amount of damage done by crying wolf. It serves to trivialize the SETI enterprise, and occasionally wastes telescope time as researchers try to follow up on a supposed detection. In addition, it might cause the gullible to dig bomb shelters, pile up their mashed potatoes at dinner, or simply spend a year living in fear.

In view of the fact that we will likely have many unwarranted claims of alien detection before the real deal arrives, there's been some effort to avoid misunderstandings. A small group of scientists, a subset of the International Academy of Astronautics' SETI Permanent Study Group (the only worldwide SETI organization), hope to establish a publicly accessible clearinghouse (read: "website") where experts can weigh in on the merits or otherwise of a report that aliens are on the air or in the neighborhood.

Sure, the conspiracy-minded might choose to dispute whatever the experts say, but after all, isn't expert opinion worth more than random sentiment? Frankly, a clearinghouse would be good to have and might save you the bother of working yourself into an unproductive lather the next time you hear that beings from another solar system are cruising ours -- or are making their presence known in some other way. It would be especially useful for the press, who must rapidly decide if a story has merit.

Meanwhile, you needn't worry about the blue meanies "beyond Pluto." These particular visitors are just another case in which the advertising was better than the product.

 
 
 
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sassafra
I yam what I yam and tha's all what I yam
08:03 PM on 01/08/2011
ah yes the newest gift to our apocalyptic believing brethren. an odd amalgam of beliefs melding the mayan calendar which "ends" in 2012, and the christian yearning for the rapture promised by the destruction of the planet in the final battle armageddon.
it matters not that a simpler explanation exists for the mayan calendars "ending", that it's not an ending at all merely the start of a new cycle, similar to a century change. it also occurs not to the chriistian adherents of this notion that a coupling of mayan and christian apocalyptic tenets might be more than a bit odd or inapplicable. all that matters is that it dovetails neatly like any summer science fiction/fantasy film's script.
think of it as the run up period to another y2k mass hysteria, or perhaps the release of the next lord of the rings installment, "the hobbit".
in short it's exactly like those people you've heard of that dress up on weekends in funny clothes and yell, "lighting bolt ... magic missile.".
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RedDogBear
12:00 PM on 01/10/2011
I don't agree with your Y2K comparison. Yes, there was a lot of hype around Y2K but unlike the 2012 stuff Y2K was also a real problem that could have had some major problems if not for the hard work of thousands of IT professionals in the years before.
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sassafra
I yam what I yam and tha's all what I yam
11:45 PM on 01/16/2011
hee, yes i remember it all too well. in my case i was one of the software engineers tasked with combing our software for our central office telephony product for y2k bugs and fixing them.
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HeevenSteven
20 Minutes into the future.
10:17 AM on 01/08/2011
You don't think facts are going to deter belief do you?
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HeevenSteven
20 Minutes into the future.
12:03 PM on 01/08/2011
@JohnFromCensornati: "Ha! You scoff. What do you think is killing all those
blackbirds, smartypants?"

Lol!
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05:58 PM on 01/07/2011
Seth - Keep up the good work.
04:44 PM on 01/07/2011
We need.....The Doctor!
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03:28 PM on 01/07/2011
The alien siting was bogus, the Sorcha Faal sighting all too real.
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bong-o-boy
10:49 AM on 01/07/2011
i just talked to the aliens; they told me its not them
Bellla
Trans & Proud
10:32 AM on 01/07/2011
Aw shucks, I wuz kinda lookin' forward to that...
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gutenmorgen
a.k.a. crowsnest
09:34 AM on 01/07/2011
Every so often our solar system passes through interstellar clouds. When that happens it is not entirely impossible that sizable chunks of matter enter the solar system from the 'outside'. I understand that we are not now passing through an interstellar cloud.
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Jeff Rosenbury
I love all people -- in the abstract
09:04 AM on 01/07/2011
Two things.

First, aliens are likely to be alien. They could visit earth and we might never notice. "Sphere" by Michael Crichton is a SF novel that explores this idea.

Second, and related to the first, is that expert opinion is less useful in this area than it might appear.

Basically, if it's a good story we can discount it's truth. Aliens will not be interested in fulfilling human dramatic desires.
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08:28 AM on 01/07/2011
While the Beatles were playing on Ed Sullivan, SETI was watching the Osmonds on Mike Douglas. The Osmonds, after all, are closer to the frequency of hydrogen, and that's where we are looking, so best not to turn away,
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Carl Caroli
I just don't understand people
07:38 AM on 01/07/2011
Any advanced civilizations seeking intelligent life forms are wasting their time coming to this planet.
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Militant Leftist
American seditionist
09:37 AM on 01/07/2011
Yes..and because of that, they probably passed us by some time ago.
lastpost
see biography
07:10 AM on 01/07/2011
“three objects the size of Delaware entering the solar system”.
Possibly the budget deficits, of a trio of leading insolvent economies?

“you should expect it to make landfall in 2012”
Shortly after humans go extinct then? Might be the new owners moving in.

“parts of the world you need shots to visit”.
And further treatment, for what you can expect to bring back.

“a year living in fear”
This isn’t a new desensitizing technique being trialed by government, is it? Like a placebo, only in reverse. “Here is the news. The imminent threat of annihilation is revealled to be fly droppings on the lens of the telescope. Meanwhile, world money markets collapsed today, following revelations of wrongdoing uncovered by Wikileaks. And now, the weather”.
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06:22 AM on 01/07/2011
They aren't aliens, they are liberals coming to bring communism to planet earth, AHHHHHHHHHHHHH! Tune into FOX for instructions!
05:37 AM on 01/07/2011
Once again, I ask for a dedicated SCIENCE section on HP, which would feature articles such as this one.
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Jeff Rosenbury
I love all people -- in the abstract
09:06 AM on 01/07/2011
Yes, but where would the actual science articles go?
04:45 AM on 01/08/2011
***Yes, but where would the actual science articles go?***

In the "SCIENCE" section.
 
 
 
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Sharkcellar
SUPPORT YOUR LOCAL LIBRARY.
10:54 AM on 01/07/2011
+1
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jimspy
Quod quae operibus sufficit.
02:10 AM on 01/07/2011
We just better hope its not the Vogons...I don't think we can get a galactic injunction in time...