Unfortunately, many parents and guardians prefer to rely on a five word police commentary and the first two minutes of the nightly news to keep them informed of the social climate and behaviors of their young urban males' environment. Does this sound familiar? A parent/guardian is watching the 6pm news where there is a story of a big neighborhood teenage fight or a shooting involving a teenager in the area. The parent/guardian looks at their young male and says, "I know you don't have anything to do with that? Right?" And of course, the young man is going to say "nawh." And then, he will most likely leave the room or area to quickly avoid any more questions. You as the parent/guardian will feel like you have done your duty and that will most likely be the end of your inquiry. I am here to tell you that ain't good enough. You will fail at monitoring your young male's safety and properly managing his environment.
TEN SUCCESSFUL TIPS FOR RAISING YOUNG URBAN MALES
Monitoring young urban males will be a very hard task. Several factors will increase or decrease the level of difficulties you will face as your young male grows older. Here are some Tried & True tips that will help make the process of monitoring him easier.
◾1- "Setting the tone early" in your young male's mind. Let him know at age 10 who the boss and or bosses are. You don't want to be repeating this when they are at age 16, at that age (16) you only want to constantly remind him as a refresher course.
◾2- You as a parent/guardian must go further in investigating and answering the questions of- "why and what is going on in the life of your young male?" And
◾3- You cannot afford to put off interventions with him until the next day. Timing is crucial in helping young males make good decisions at the right time - developing future coping skills.
◾4- You cannot worry about losing your friendship between you and your young male.. Be the parent!
◾5- You cannot always worry about hurting his feelings. Establish your position!
◾6- You cannot allow yourself to turn a blind eye and be in constant denial.
◾7- You must at all times follow your gut instinct, because if you suspect that your young male is doing something negative or inappropriate there is a great chance he is.
◾8- Demand passwords/logins for his accounts-Facebook, Twitter, Snap Chat, KiK, Instagram and other social media sites.
◾9- Make random checks of his bed room, car (for smell), cell phone calls and messages, social media accounts and photos.
◾10- Think and act like the police, but don't try to be the police.