iPhone app iPad app Android phone app Android tablet app More

Featuring fresh takes and real-time analysis from HuffPost's signature lineup of contributors
Sharon Greenthal

GET UPDATES FROM Sharon Greenthal
 

10 Things To Look Forward To As An Empty Nester

Posted: 07/31/2012 7:49 am

Eventually, all parents become empty nesters, whether it's when the kids leave for college, work, marriage or other pursuits. Suddenly, your home is no longer the place where your children live. Though it takes some adjusting, patience and creativity, being an empty nester can be an exciting and rejuvenating time. Many parents look towards the empty nest with some trepidation, but there's so much to enjoy about this new phase in your life. Here are 10 things to look forward to when the kids fly the coop:

Loading Slideshow...
  • Your House Is Clean

    Gone is the detritus of your children's lives scattered here and there, carelessly flung about and forgotten. Your bathroom towels will stay hung neatly on their bars, the dishes are placed in the dishwasher instead of left to sit next to the sink. Beds remain made, floors remain clean, clothes are neatly put away. Mystery spills vanish, and you never wake up to a mess. Who knew it could be like this?

  • You Discover You Still Like Your Partner...Or Make A Big Change

    Some couples decide that it's time to separate and move on, others remember why it was they fell in love in the first place -- or find new reasons and ways to connect to each other. Without your kids, you become each other's only companion when you're at home. <em>It can't be overstated how much of a distraction our kids are while they are growing up.</em> This is probably the most jolting part of the empty nest -- when you look at each other and think, "Oh wow, it's just us now." For better or worse, it will happen.

  • You Can Sleep Through The Night

    No longer are you waiting for the sound of a key in the door, or the porch light to be turned off upon your children's safe return from another night out. No longer are you part of the day-to-day ups and downs of your children's lives ... no matter how often they may text/call/email/facebook message/tweet you. Their mental and physical well-being, though still hugely important to you, are their responsibilities now, and you no longer have the minutiae of their daily lives to think about like you did when they lived at home.

  • You Food Bill Drops Significantly

    If your kids are in college, or even if they're not, you may still be paying for them to eat. But it's nice to go to the grocery store and come home with the things you want, and not have to buy all the things they want, things that you really don't want in your house.

  • You Have A Lot More Free Time

    Initially, this may be disturbing or difficult for you to deal with. You may want to do things you've missed -- museums, movies, theater, travel or you may not want to do much of anything at all. Whatever your thing is, there's now time to do it ... a lot of time.

  • You Can Spend Time With People You Like

    No longer do you have to socialize with other parents because of your children's connections. No more booster club barbecues or committee meetings, making small talk with people you most likely never would have crossed paths with if it weren't for the fact that your children were on the same team/in the same class/part of the same group of friends.

  • You Begin To Experience Your Children As Young Adults

    Your children leave home and, for better or worse, they have to grow up, no matter how much help you may be giving them financially OR emotionally. There are just too many daily things to manage, too many random people to deal with, too many bumps and blips that they have to encounter on their own that leads to them, inevitably and sometimes painfully, growing up. It can be liberating when kids take over, driving or planning or explaining -- giving up some authority is in many ways a big relief.

  • Your Kids Come To Visit...

    There's nothing quite as wonderful as seeing your kids after weeks or months apart, especially when they first go away to college. Their faces are familiar and beautiful, their smiles just for you, their laundry ready to be washed...it's such a thrill to have them home for holidays, or summers, or a weekend visit. Within minutes of their return, it's as though they never left. You love having them home for a while, but then...

  • ...Then They Go Back Where They Came From

    Enough said.

  • Your Future Is Yours

    Remember before kids, when you would dream and plan for the rest of your life? Remember when it was wide open, and you had no idea what would happen next? Well, you can do that again, now that you're an empty-nester. No longer do you have to worry about childcare, or kids missing school, or whether they'll like the place you pick to go on vacation -- your time, your future, and your life is yours to create. Always wanted to travel? Now you can. Go back to school? Now's the time. Write a book? Get cracking. You have your life to live, just as they have theirs. Go do it!

 

Follow Sharon Greenthal on Twitter: www.twitter.com/sharongreenthal

FOLLOW FIFTY
Eventually, all parents become empty nesters, whether it's when the kids leave for college, work, marriage or other pursuits. Suddenly, your home is no longer the place where your children live. Thoug...
Eventually, all parents become empty nesters, whether it's when the kids leave for college, work, marriage or other pursuits. Suddenly, your home is no longer the place where your children live. Thoug...
 
 
  • Comments
  • 16
  • Pending Comments
  • 0
  • View FAQ
Comments are closed for this entry
View All
Favorites
Recency  | 
Popularity
02:38 PM on 08/05/2012
I grieved so hard at the end of my hands-on parenting career. I saw all the things I loved about raising my kids ending, and a yawning, gaping hole of a life spanned out empty before me.

LOL!

Oh, how naive I was. I LOVE being an empty nester.
photo
HUFFPOST SUPER USER
jojo2
12:08 PM on 08/01/2012
Cooking things you like!
Listening to your music as loud as you want!
No extra "guests" at the dinner table!
Having the washer and drier all to yourself!
Your kids realizing how much it costs for food, housing and utilities! Priceless!!
photo
RickinBoca
Thats my opinion and I could be...
09:17 AM on 08/01/2012
You forgot sex.
photo
HUFFPOST BLOGGER
Sharon Greenthal
Editor-in-Chief, Generation Fabulous
10:23 PM on 08/01/2012
Good point!
photo
HUFFPOST SUPER USER
teatwerp
the 2012 teadump is coming
07:57 AM on 08/01/2012
we're taking our first vacation alone to an adults only resort for our 35th anniversary. YIPPEE!
10:41 AM on 08/01/2012
Good for you! Have a wonderful time.

We took a road trip last weekend, and all 5 of our tribe called us, four told us to have a great time, one of them said we'd have more fun if he came along. My husband assured him that was definitely not the case.
02:22 AM on 08/01/2012
Let me add these to the list:

Your car insurance bill goes down.
Your car has gas and when you get in, the seat is where you left it, and your hair doesn't get blasted back by the loud music when you start it up.
You can run to the linen closet when you need a towel without having to get fully dressed, because there's no chance you'll traumatize your offspring, and go into debt for their psychiatric care.
You no longer have to hide your chocolate in a container marked "broccoli" in the freezer.
11:59 AM on 08/01/2012
All true. Especially the chocolate.
This user has chosen to opt out of the Badges program
photo
rivergirl301
My micro-bio is empty
07:28 PM on 07/31/2012
My kids used to set up shop outside my bedroom for the night right as I was getting ready to go to bed, around 11 p.m., armed with their cell phones, computer games, video games, TV shows, DVDs and music. I am not sorry those days are gone!!!
photo
HUFFPOST BLOGGER
Sharon Greenthal
Editor-in-Chief, Generation Fabulous
09:21 PM on 07/31/2012
I had a similar situation - our family room is very close to our bedroom, and teenage voices carry...loudly. I don't miss that one bit!
This user has chosen to opt out of the Badges program
photo
rivergirl301
My micro-bio is empty
11:18 PM on 07/31/2012
My son is starting college in less than a month as a theater major -- he has a very loud, booming voice!
04:23 PM on 07/31/2012
Great article! So true!

Kelly
http://www.zazzle.com/artnip
photo
HUFFPOST SUPER USER
GrownandFlown
...because parenting never ends.
11:57 AM on 07/31/2012
Not surprising that clean house is #1 on your list - our son is home from college for the summer and, oh, my, his room......a disaster! Thanks for all the reminders of good things to come for the empty nester.
This user has chosen to opt out of the Badges program
photo
rivergirl301
My micro-bio is empty
07:26 PM on 07/31/2012
When my kids were home, they "trashed" my house (well, not literally) as fast as I could clean it up. Now when I clean it, it actually stays clean.
85Percent
Southern Liberal & Michigander
10:59 AM on 07/31/2012
,,,,and you (and your spouse) can run around the house nekkid.

Whether all these other things are true or not depends on the pets one has.
HUFFPOST SUPER USER
smmrselysummers
Be the parent your children can be proud of
10:44 AM on 07/31/2012
I agree with every one of those, plus I like being able to walk across the house in my underwear to get another cup of coffee in the morning. More to the point, I don't have wonder who is around the corner.