As I watched the Republican YouTube Bible Class the other day, with all the candidates contending for the holier than thou vote, all except Rudy, the reformed reprobate, from whom newly revealed sins keep spitting out like quarters from the jackpot of a Vegas slot-machine, I was struck by an idea of theological proportions. Inspired by the sight of all the Republican fat cats pretending that their lives are lived as an imitation of Christ, whose mission in life, as I understand it, was to comfort the sick and the poor and ready the rest of us for the Kingdom of Heaven, these candidates prefer to support the richest and most powerful as they vie with each other to express their contempt for the planet earth, as well as their hatred for the very "aliens," those strangers Christ would have comforted. A bell rang in my head, no, not quite a bell, more like one of those light-bulbs that go on over the head of a cartoon character like Dagwood in "Blondie" as he comes up with an idea for a new sandwich. The gist of it is that Bush will leave office un-impeached thanks to a timid Democratic leadership and that this is an offense against man and God and the Constitution. So we will have to help God in accomplishing justice, if not on earth, in the hereafter. Thus the "Bush for Damnation" movement which I am starting here and now. Here's my personal rationale for it.
Many of us believe that we make our Heaven and Hell here on earth through our decent and indecent acts and through our relationship to others. Not so for George Bush. He is a man who claims that he has had direct contact with the Almighty and claims that he is doing God's work for which he will be rewarded after death. Now God is not to be taken lightly - just witness the Old Testament and the fate of so many who thought they knew Jehovah's mind. God may not care for W's presumption. And if we are what we eat, then we are most certainly what we believe. George W. is up for Heaven or Hell. And since he's lived his life by elections (albeit some of them rigged) the popular vote would be an appropriate way to determine his fate in the afterlife.
It is apparent that this President believes in the literal truth of the bible as do those other Republican saints in their debates. The damned in many religions are destined for torment in a lake of divine fire for all eternity, or at least until the Lord reprieves them after they have suffered sufficiently. There are a lot of flames licking at the feet, fearful cries of pain, un-assuaged tears, and unheard cries of repentance in that Hell. Actually, some of this hell is hard to find in the bible. A considerable amount of it was borrowed from Greek mythology, and a lot of it was added to in the Middle Ages by clerics and rulers who sought to keep an illiterate, impoverished and rebellious populace under control, but it lingers on in the mind of a George W. Bush. Thus he believes that he will be embraced by the Lord Almighty or thrown into the fiery pit. Now I believe that the man who ignored the warnings of 9/11 which caused the deaths of thousands, the man who lied about the reasons for the Iraq war, causing the death of untallied thousands more, the man who resists real health-care for poor children, and prefers to spend the national treasure on wars and untaxed estate give-aways to the super-rich, such a man might be a mote in the eye of God. He cannot be exonerated because he didn't know better - he is not the fool that some people take him for; he is cunning, manipulative, and determined, with a rough and ready political intelligence. What he lacks absolutely is moral intelligence which, I fear, is sometimes hard to distinguish from actual evil. If that is so we must ask ourselves why God hasn't intervened in this case. It is clear to me that every so often a very busy God needs some help from his creations - we ordinary folks. Follow the case of Mother Theresa as testimony of miracles, good works and a super-holy life will elevate her to sainthood. We hereby propose an election to damnation for George W. Bush. Let W spend an eternity of clearing brush that ignites in his arms just as he thinks he's got it under control, let him watch his mother, the imperious Barbara, as she is obliged to live for an eternity with Katrina victims, and wash their feet endlessly, let him ...oh, you get it, add your own favorite damnation to the list. I want W to live a long and reflective life, to come to an understanding of what he has done, and what he has failed to do, but I fear the rest of it will be about creating a fake legacy and a real library and making well paid speeches before some Chamber of Commerce. So be it. I'm speaking only of the hereafter and the fate that might await him.
Among his companions in the fiery lake, aside from Karl Rove, who will provide constant fuel for the fire in Texas barbeque fashion; there is the five hundred pound Ann Coulter, who diets ferociously in her personal Hell, only to find that the more she diets, the more weight she gains, while the dark roots are revealed in her well singed, lanky blonde hair. Condemned to eternal damnation because of her political bulimia, her lifetime of cooking lies and vomiting hate, Ann will be one of W's companions, along with Rummy who will forever be caught in a "shock and awe" bombardment from which there is no respite. Just sign up and we are ready to go. And blessings on all of you as you help to do the Lord's work.