“Fourteen years ago my oldest son was about to get his learner's permit to drive. I took my boys to Universal Studios on a vacation day. On one of the rides, my soon-to-driver stuck his middle finger up and laughed at the cameras that shoot all riders so they may purchase a photo as a memento after disembarking the ride. Well, my son ruined that picture for about 10 other people who were in the shot. People from Germany, Japan, Mexico..
A team member from Universal met us at the bottom of the ride and told me what happened. My son was shame faced and hung his head. He was an honor student, but somehow, failed this test.
The result: I did not allow him to take his permit test until he was 18 - 8 months later! He never forgot that lesson in his life. He's a responsible and respectful adult today, and he still loves me (his Mom) forever, he says.”
“I was married to a man from a different culture - we shared the same religion. My husband began his violent tirades within months our nuptials. In my youth, I witnessed my father beating my mother until I was16 - when he left us forever. My parents were of the same culture - what was my father's excuse? I grew up believing beatings were normal.
I too was slapped in front of his friends even in public. I was punched at home. He slammed me against walls. Like Kim Lee, I too was kicked on a carpeted floor. People said he'd mellow out after we had children.
After 3 1/2 years of marriage we had a daughter. He was a 'good' during my pregnancy. Then, back to 'normal.' I suffered until my child was 2. After another tirade, I left with my child - hiding at a high school classmates' home. He found me by calling all the numbers in my phone book. He begged and pleased for me to return. But, I knew better - one more beating might be my last.
I filed for civil divorce. But he kept me dangling without my religious freedom for 5 years. When I became free, I remarried a wonderful gentleman and had 3 more kids. He raised my daughter until her marriage.
I believe that a culture that accepts wife beating perpetuates it. A man who observes his parents in a loving relationship is more likely to model after them.”
“Betty! I was introduced to you informally by a dear mutual friend. I can't believe this - but I just felt like I was reading my own words - different time, diffferent setting - same emotions! You are a gem!”
“dearest margaret - it is not unusual for a mother to offer herself to her maker after her spouse leaves this world. And, to lose 2 daughters and have a son with a heart condition adds to the stress of aging, for sure. it is unnatural for a child - whatever age, to predecease their parent. none of us wish to be witness to that. yet, you are here on this earth for a reason and you must not fight it. take good care of yourself for as long as you can. give your son an injection of cheer and good will whenever you can. never stop telling him how much you love him and want him to be healthy. he still needs your nurturing. wishing you a wonderful warm spring - your dear husband spirit still surrounds you. i was once told a beautiful old adage by an Armenian journalist..after my mother passed in '99 - she said, "Hold hands with her memory." So, I did, and it worked. Try to hold hands with your husband's and your two daughters' - think of all the wonder and joy they gave you in their lifetimes. The memories should always stay with you!”
“I had a husband who met all 5 criteria. He passed away last June after ONLY 31 years of marriage. He was only 65. Although I appreciated him and loved him dearly from almost the day I met him, I could not pinpoint all these attributes so clearly and concisely as this article does. And, the part that brings back the memories of the years we raised kids, suffered financial difficulties, built a home together from the ground up after the Northridge earthquake, and we endured - we fought, we never gave up - HE NEVER BORED ME - EVER! The marriage was fresh and exciting every day. I used to smile to myself when I heard his car pull up - even if we had harsh words on the phone, or a tiff the day before. Yes, he was my rock - my provider, never gave up on me or on us - the kids and I surely came first! I miss him terribly and would just love to tell the world how much I loved him!”
mgjj on Mar 26, 2012 at 03:01:25
“I am so sorry for your loss Eva.”
Margaret Beacham on Mar 26, 2012 at 02:53:56
“I had a good husband who always took care of his family. But I thought he was to conserative at times.He was in the Army,and we moved to different places,went to Germany twice.But I met him in August when he came home from the war in Germany and we were married in October 1945, we were married for almost 65 years,liking one month and twenty days.He died in August 2010. And I miss him so much.He has been dead for 19 months and it seems like for ever to me I think of him almost all the time.We lost our two daughters,both had cancer and died 2 and 1/2 years apart,we have one son and he has had 3 heart attacks.Please any one reading this pray for him please that God will keep him safe until he takes me.I don`t know if I should pray like that,but I don`t want to be left here all alone.I am 85 years old now. I wish I could have my husband back but God knows best. I hope to meet him and my children again some day,and never again part.”
impossibledreamr on Mar 26, 2012 at 02:26:47
“Eva, That was a beautiful and touching tribute to your husband. Although I read the list in the article and thought that all of these qualities in one mere mortal man would be impossible...reading the wonderful things you said about your beloved made me smile. It sounds like you were both very blessed. You had the gift of an incredible man, and he had a beautiful, intelligent woman to adore him. It sounds like you were truly soulmates in every sense of the word. Thank you for sharing your real life love story.”
Baryl on Mar 26, 2012 at 02:22:17
“I am soooooo sorry for your loss. I hope you can have peace in your heart.
It's really unfair isn't it? Anyway, that is how I feel. Husband died year and a half ago after 25 years.
Was he perfect? (mine) Nope, but perfect for me.”
keithmbowden1 on Mar 26, 2012 at 02:19:26
“That is so sweet! I am so sorry for your loss! He knows how much you love him, and you will be together forever, but not yet! For now, he will be by your side, and waiting for you to join him. But, not yet! You have more to do here! Live life, and enjoy everything you can!”
theitalian on Mar 26, 2012 at 02:00:28
“I bet you were as wonderful a wife to him as he was the wonderful husband as you described.”
anitafeeney on Mar 26, 2012 at 01:33:20
“fanned for your wonderful post”
human2008 on Mar 26, 2012 at 01:28:46
“Smile is the best jewelry a man loves to see everyday, you husband was a lucky man.. god bless his soul.”
jeantopete on Mar 26, 2012 at 01:12:47
“I come from unlucky in love 3 times and I want to congratulate you for your marriage story. There are those out there who possess the qualities you have listed here. Wish there were more.”