“That is so awesome. And so why I have to be careful to always lock my front door. My toddler is an escape artist, and he would totally do that if he could.”
Lea Benny Stum on Jun 1, 2014 at 00:36:44
“And your totally a good mom for locking your doors. I think any toddler would go for an adventure if they could. I know mine would, hence locked doors lol”
ConverseTheShort on May 31, 2014 at 20:30:05
“We recently learned that our toddler can unlock and open the sliding glass door w/the help of a chair and a box. Luckily, the neighbors grabbed her before she got near a busy street, but it was a bit too close for my taste. So yeah...a 2"x4" is now in the track so that she cannot escape again.
I hear you though, they are crafty little people!”
“Here's the last paragraph from Emma:
"Sometimes in life you’ll have some things, at other times you will have other things," she continued. "You don’t need it all at once, it’s not good for you. Motherhood is a full-time job. The only way I could have continued working would have been by delegating the running of the home to other people. I never wanted to do this as I find motherhood profoundly enjoyable."
I read it. "You don't need it all at once." If you want to put food on the table, you do.
The very last paragraph is from Angelina Jolie. Different person.”
“I live in SB, and I never give panhandlers money. I almost never go downtown anymore, as I'm tired of being hit up or bothered when I'm walking with my kids. Usually the people who bother me are men in their early 20's.”
“Very interesting opinion. Do you know that until the 1830's, abortion was legal in the US? Among other things, it was the movement away from "community" and towards "nuclear family" that resulted in them being made illegal. Regardless, there were about 800,000 abortions a year performed by licensed physicians in the 1930's (Wikipedia), compared to 1.06 million in 2011.
The thing that I find interesting is that this country has moved away from the idea of community and into the idea of independence, when that wasn't always "normal". So "independence" means: I get to tell you what to do with your body. If you get pregnant, you cannot have an abortion. When you have to child, you must take care of it yourself, I want nothing to do with you. A far cry from how things used to be.
If you want some interesting reading on the subject, among many other subjects, read THE WAY WE NEVER WERE by Stephanie Coontz. I'm only about 1/2 way through it, but it's quite fascinating. Research heavy, so it's not a book to read when you are tired, unless you want to fall asleep quickly.”
“What if the baby is addicted to drugs or has fetal alcohol syndrome? Are they still willing? Or should we institutionalize pregnant women to make sure they aren't taking anything, force them to remain pregnant, and THEN take the baby.”
“That's very interesting. I have found the opposite bias in most of my jobs. Nobody sees me come in at 7:30 am, but my boss does see me leave at 4:30 pm every day. While my coworkers are here until 6 (but roll in at 9).”
“Sure there are ways to work around it (I did so myself), but it is not easy. What I have seen in the last 20 years is that the % of students going to college has increased immensely, and also the # of students who are "first-timers". The first in their family. These students don't have the benefit of their parents' knowledge.
Their parents tell them to go to college to get a better job. They all agree on loans because it's the only way to pay for it. Nobody realizes that a degree in humanities might not get you very far when there is a lot of competition. "Because everyone does it" is a great idea until you realize you are one of thousands, and everyone competes for the same jobs.
My roommate at one point graduated the year before me, degree in math. Could not find a job, Spent a year doing temp work/ contract work. Eventually got a job, but ended up competing with new grads the following year. You never make up for the lost pay from graduating during a recession.”
“They did work very hard - I didn't argue that. Many many of them failed (the Government sold huge acreage for low money, but only if you managed to "settle" and live there for 5 years. Most failed.) They helped their neighbors.
But they *didn't* do it alone, they had a LOT of help from the Government. There is this whole idea that people helped themselves way back when with no help from the Government, and people now do not. We are over romanticizing the past.”
“Interestingly, however, if you look at the percentage that people in the 70's spent on "entertainment", it was MORE than we spend today. Sure "what" we spend our money on is different, but the percentage was more. Fascinating stuff. I've recently read a couple of books about it. One was "The Overspent American" that discussed, and theorized just that - we have so many things like cell phones and microwaves, computers and TVs that we did not have before. Nicer cars too. The next was "The Two Income Trap", that showed the actual data. Despite the perception of Americans spending all their money on these newfangled things, the numbers don't actually bear that out (it's a smaller percentage of the total).”
“But who defines what "entry level" is, really?
Because "entry level" has changed. It used to be that bagging groceries was "entry level". And you could "move up" into stocking, cashier work, bakery, deli, etc.
Now many people consider any grocery store job as "entry level".
Pretty soon all of the jobs left in the US will be "entry level".”
“Much of this started in the 1950's, actually, when the government decided to spend its money on interstates. This caused the increase in suburbs, and the increase in car usage. This led to the decline in public transportation, which hurt the poor immensely.”
almedoz on May 19, 2014 at 15:21:30
“Makes sense. All in pursuit of the American dream...”
“They do, at least, they try to. But there aren't as many jobs, and what jobs they find are very part time. I cannot imagine trying to piece together 3 or 4 jobs with a couple of kids.”
Sheryl L Bratcher on May 19, 2014 at 15:01:41
“Yeah, I'll give ya that. I don't know how women in small towns do it.
People put down the "big city" a lot but the resources available to women far outnumber the smaller towns without a doubt.
I'm not religious but from what I understand it's supposed to be family oriented. I know that here the churches (the non-greedy ones) help out with childcare and the members help each other as well. But There's also what I call the greedy ones who fo some reason I don't understand don't have programs geared towards helping the family back on their feet first.
Programs like food banks and child care based on income. Or volunteers who watch the kids for free.
We had the park program here who is really low cost after school and summer care.”
“"There was no safety net, there were no government babysitters. You simply had to depend on yourself and your neighbors, that mentality has all but disappeared. " Interesting - but I am reading a good book right now called "The Way we Never Were". That whole idea about how people who went out west to make in on their own? Yeah, lots of Government help they had. Yes, they relied on their neighbors, but they also relied on others for trains, water (dams), removing the "hostiles" (Native Americans). Also, the government spent billions buying Mexico and the Louisiana purchase and "sold" it to settlers for a huge loss. But go on.”
Nikki Jaid on May 19, 2014 at 16:04:36
“Well said, Marcia. People like this seem to believe life was this Utopian journey back in the early days of the US. It's almost as if they saw a few movies depicting those times and based their entire belief system upon those moving images. They have clearly not studied history as much as they would have you believe or they wouldn't have such narrow minded viewpoints.”
lockds on May 19, 2014 at 16:04:09
“What does that have to do with the American Spirit they showed? The willingness to do whatever it takes. Not sit in the drive-thru with a headset on treating customers like crap and thinking you in some way deserve more than a minimum wage for doing the bare minimum?”
“What about all those people who did, still cannot find a job, and are now $40,000 in debt? (college loans)”
alli07marie on May 19, 2014 at 12:42:40
“I went to college full time, at a "cheap" state school, worked 30+ hours a week, and because of that I graduated with a little over $6,000 dollars in debt. My monthly payments were $60, that hardly breaks the bank. There are a couple things incoming students need to be smart about:
#1) Pick a major/study area that guarantees you a decent paying job (I know there is no guarantees but some majors do far better than others).
#2) DON'T agree to high paying institutions because you think they are the only options. Many state schools over the same sort of degrees as the high paying institutions.
#3) Work while in school, at the very list this will lighten your expenses for food/gas/etc plus hopefully you are able to save some to cover a portion of your tuition.
#4) Although I will argue that college (or those young years) of your life are very important in discovering who you are and creating a social circle for yourself, in the long run the parties you attend don’t matter rather the classes do.
I'm not saying the system is perfect (clearly it isn't) but there are ways to work around it. There is no reason to be boggled down by loans. Well I guess unless you are becoming a doctor or something else that takes exponentially longer and therefore more money.”
“It's a pretty fascinating mess that we've gotten ourselves into.
"Menial labor doesn't deserve more money. WOrk hard, get more skills."
"I got more skills, now I have tens of thousands in college loans and still a low paying job"
"Keep trying! Stop being lazy!"
I just recently read "The Two Income Trap" and am now reading "The Way We Never Were". Very fascinating books on America and family and economy.
The problem is that it's very hard to pull yourself out of poverty. Not only do you have to work hard, be smart, figure out how to get an education with little/no money - but you have to do it in a way that you can build a buffer of savings to handle emergencies. And if you are poor, and grew up poor, you cannot go to mom and dad for that. What do you do when there is nobody to turn to?”