We live in world where women, commodified, are celebrated for dressing "like sluts" to sell things, but everywhere are slut-shamed if they dare speak up to defend themselves, protest rape and sexual assault, or fight for fundamental rights. This is wrong.
Slut-shaming, which is what Rush Limbaugh attempted last week, is like a national sport: we embarrass, insult or otherwise denigrate girls and woman for their real or extrapolated sexual behavior, including for dressing in sexual ways, having sexual feelings and/or exploring and exhibiting them. Entire industries are based on this idea.
Rush Limbaugh did us an unintended service, however. He made this clear to everyone, when he repeatedly called Sandra Fluke a slut and a prostitute and asked her to make a sex tape for him: every woman, even one simply speaking civilly and intelligently in her own interest, can be called a slut for no other reason that she's a woman. That's because the defining characteristic of a slut is not her sexual behavior - it's her gender. In this way, more people now understand that a slut is any woman who wants, on her own terms, to control her reproduction (for whatever reason), build a life, earn a living of her own, dress how she wants, and take care of her health and her family.
Every woman knows the word slut has power. Whether you love it or hate it, the word 'slut' is an evocation of a gender double standard used to control women and no woman alive hasn't thought about what it means to be labeled in this way. In some cultures, where honor killings take place, it is a matter of life or death.
If you're a "good" woman, don't kid yourself. It means you've spent your life and will continue to spend your life calibrating your appearance, speech and behaviour so that you are not a slut. By not acknowledging how the word is used you are embracing its power over you and other girls and women. And you will pass that corrupt and misguided abuse of power on to your daughters and mine. That's because you know, deep down, that at any point that word can be used against you. Every woman is a slut waiting to happen. Women who abhor the word, find it vulgar, and fear it, the ones who slut-shame others, gain a little bit of power by participating in a system that denigrates them.
Other women, and their male allies, reject the power of the word and the social structures that perpetuate its harm. (Something tells me Sandra Fluke understands this and Rush Limbaugh doesn't.) These women and men know it for what it is - a word used to control women and their bodies, and it is useless as a weapon against them. These are the people transforming the world by using social media to coalesce and change culture. Here is why:
A "Slut" Manifesto
BECAUSE we know what's best for us and yes, we do "deserve better"
BECAUSE we know that we are more than our wombs
BECAUSE we believe no double standards, including sexual ones, should exist
BECAUSE we believe we have the right to control our own reproduction
BECAUSE we will not be complicit in our own oppression by conforming to perversely-constructed rules about how women and men should behave
BECAUSE we understand basic science, embrace diversity, and are part of the modern world
BECAUSE we believe that how we dress does not give a man the right to rape a woman, spit on a female child or publicly strip another human being to humiliate them
BECAUSE we will not be silenced by bullies and thugs and will speak openly, politically and with conviction about important issues that affect us in the public space
BECAUSE we are justifiably angry
BECAUSE we, and the men who think as we do, are the future and will transform this planet
We will speak, write, march, run for office and vote.
So, even if the word 'slut' makes you uncomfortable or you think it is crass, consider these ideas: Don't sleep with mean people and don't vote for sexist, racist, homophobic ones who want to deny you of your human rights.
Follow Soraya Chemaly on Twitter: www.twitter.com/schemaly
Gwyneth Holland: Not Just Tulisa: 'Sex Tape' Scandals Shame Girls Every Day
Men and women are equals. This does not mean that they are equal in every single thing they do. For example, men are, on average, physically stronger than women. It is much easier for a semi attractive (even a 6/10) woman to go out and get laid. The same cannot be said about men. Men have to work at it, have some skill (game) and thereby get a woman to sleep with them. It is a LOT harder for an equally attractive man to get women than it is the other way around. This is one of reasons behind why we, as a society, naturally celebrate men who are successful in bedding multiple women; while at the same time shame women who bed multiple men.
Let us briefly visit the topic of virginity from both perspectives. Virginity in a man is not a desirable state or label when it comes to an attribute that the opposite sex wants. This is because he has obviously not been preselected by other women. However, female virginity is not looked at negatively in the least by men. If she looks decent, no man cares if the girl is a virgin or not. In fact, a female virgin is often wanted more.
Do you want to bring a woman down? Degrade and demean her? Make her feel like an unwelcome outcast? Easy. Call her a backward, anti-choice, homophobic, sexist, Catholic, bible-thumping, Jesus freak, conservative tea-bagger*. That ought to teach that bitch!
*All terms approved by Politburo as of March 2012.
Don't forget the psychological studies which had same adjectives used to describe females and males. The males were seen as assertive and the women aggressive b...s. This was by educated women as well as men. Our culture is so biased against women's rights and equality that even liberated women are biased against women (on an unconscious level).
We need to teach our toddlers better so in a few generations there will be less bias. Your parents thought you well.
Femists want equality and have no agenda to oppress men. If all the women in your life are oppressing you, you should look inside yourself.
@cinemaven - well stated! I couldn't say it any better so I'll second everything you said.
@Truther Hikohito - it's unfortunate that you feel so oppressed and need to take it out on women. Is a group that is cheated out of 20% of their pay (a loss of $380,000 over a woman's career) and 1 in 5 being raped a group that is oppressing or being oppressed and in need of more help? If your daughter was denied equal pay or, hopefully not, raped, would you tell her to stop oppressing men?
+ According to the US Federal Government Dept. of Labor, Women still need to work an average of 15 1/2 months to make what Men make in 12 months.(See Below)
+ "Nearly 1 in 5 women and 1 in 71 men in the United States have been raped at some time in their lives." - Control, Centers for Disease Control and Prevention; 2011.
"When the Equal Pay Act was signed into law by President Kennedy almost 50 years ago, women were earning an average of 59 cents on the dollar compared to men. Today, we have narrowed that gap, but women still earn about 80 cents on the dollar compared to men. That gap results in the loss of $380,000 over a woman's career." US DOL
This is why feminists are uncaring misandrists and hypocrites.
When women were/are oppressed...did/do they look inside themselves or do they try to change society?
There is the greatest rub for Rush and the reactionaries of the GOP/Tea Party. Because they reject basic science especially when it comes to evolution and other issues like climate change, they find ideas of diversity and openness which is why they are making so much of President Obama speaking at a diversity rally when he was a student and why the birther issue even existed and they do not really want to be part of the modern world but seem to want the United States to return to some idealized version of the 19th century both socially and economically when everyone knew their place.
Indeed, considering that conservativism was born out of a negative reaction to the Enlightenment and the revolutions of the 18th century, especially ideas about equality, we really shouldn't be surprised by this. It is, at bottom, a backward looking set of ideas. The right has always been opposed to modernity, equality and progress.
http://fox13now.com/2012/03/06/house-approves-three-day-waiting-period-for-abortion/?hpt=po_bn6
You really should consider universities that are accredited.
This radio station can be heard in over 40 states! Please sign it and share it! Thanks! http://www.change.org/petitions/wham1180-radio-station-rochester-ny-dump-rush-limbaugh
They have a 5,000,000 megawatt station?