THE BLOG
06/19/2007 11:48 pm ET | Updated May 25, 2011

Hillary Clinton as Mob Boss, Possibly on Verge of...

Whoa. This is the kind of film you make after the election. When you've won. When you're feeling yourself like Rove was, circa 2002. You're so deeply entrenched, so omnipotent, you can afford to make searing fun of yourself. What's anyone going to say? They're going to laugh laugh laugh just to keep from getting shot.

This is the kind of film you make when you wish you could call Dr. Melfi, but the schedulers won't give you a chance.

Sen. Clinton, did you mean to cast yourself as a mob boss? I mean, not just a mob boss, but as a murderer, someone who would kill his own blood? Someone we suspect has regrets along with his soulful yearnings, but must carry on regardless?

Wow. That's deep.

I mean, to have the chutzpah to step into that box. You know, the one that all those bankrolled folks tried to force you into for years. Talk about owning it! You call me mobster? I'll show you mobster! Carl Bernstein recently shed some light on your friendship with Vince Foster, and Foster's deep depression pre-suicide. Regardless, conspiracy theorists have made up their own horrible explanation of his death for years, accusing you of awful crimes during one of the most painful times of your life.

Last time I checked, none of this was funny.

I'm sure if I contacted some of your detail agents, they wouldn't be laughing either. Protecting Senator Clinton in the Unites States of America is no joke. She might not have to look over her shoulder all the time. But her agents do.

I'm going to give you the benefit of the doubt on this one. I know you're a full-time candidate and a full-time Senator. While many of us have had the luxury of time to get to know the Sopranos clan, I doubt that you've watched one whole season. In your well-studied ways, you may know many facts about the characters and the storylines. But chances are you haven't spent much time analyzing and deconstructing the characters. Problem is, much of America has. We've spent a lot of time doing this. So much so, we got called out by AJ Soprano. I know you know how bad that is.

So let's get this straight: you and President Clinton, the most publicly psychoanalyzed and deconstructed couple of my generation, have managed to cast yourselves in the role of the most psychoanalyzed and deconstructed couple in TV history? Or at least of the last nine days? That's the stuff of great drama. But do you know what kind of waters you've thrown yourselves into? Eleven million people have a very fresh opinion of Tony and Carmela. You thought we were armchair psychoanalysts before. There's at least five million of us who think we're smarter than Melfi and Kepferberg combined.

We've just spent nine days sucking those bones dry. Now look who's here for dinner...

As Steve Rosenbaum says, this will certainly generate buzz. Buzz about your managerial style, your thirst for power, your "helpmate" President Clinton, who has already been quoted as saying he feels he owes it to you to do everything he can to win you this election.

For lovers of drama, this is the "spoof" that keeps on giving. Not only given on a silver platter, but emailed directly to our inboxes.

As David Chase said: "It's all there."