It's Official, I Also Endorse Obama
I took my time deciding on whether to publicly support Barack Hussein Obama for President of the United States. For starters, I didn't know if I could trust him. I'm from Chicago and ten years ago a friend of mine got burned on a bag of skunk weed on the South Side, not far from where Obama was teaching law classes. Admittedly, this was northeast of Hyde Park at 63rd and Cottage Grove, outside of 
Harold's Chicken Shack, and I'm not saying Obama had anything to do with it, but Obama knew where he was living and who he was associating with. Obama might not live in a rough area, but he lives close to one.
Further, I was concerned about Obama's economic policies. He wants to tax people who make more than $250,000 and give tax breaks to what he calls "the middle class." People throw around the term "middle class" like it applies to everyone. I don't know what that means to those of us sharing one-bedroom rent-controlled apartments. John McCain wants to give more money to the rich. That may not help me, but at least I get it. The man has ten houses; he's talking about himself and his friends. Where I come from we always chose loyalty over integrity. It's the code.
When I saw John McCain speak recently he promised to win the war in Iraq, and then use the "surge" to win the war in Afghanistan. The problem is the war in Iraq is unwinnable. It's part of the larger war on terror. We missed our chance to sink a trillion dollars into Afghanistan and turn Tora Bora into Switzerland. What McCain was talking about when he promised to win in Iraq is magic. If McCain were able to do such a thing he would be the last wizard. How often do we get a chance to elect the most powerful person in the world to the most powerful position in the world? 
Yet there are things about McCain I just can't accept. He's against socialism but promises to save social security and medicare. His wife's a former drug addict who insists she's loved America every day of her life, but her father made all of his millions bottling Belgium Beer. McCain's economic team is full of the evangelists of bank deregulation. I might have already hit on this, but in Chicago you always watch the person with the money. You count the money when they leave and you count the money when they come back. Deregulation is based on trust, and trusting people holding large sums of money is ridiculous. Deregulation is a mantra for the greedy and the foolish. My father used to say if you sit at a poker table and you don't see the mark, you're the mark. If you're in favor of deregulation and you're not rich, you're the mark.
I like Barack because he believes in talking with people. Last night, in Miami,
John McCain said he wouldn't sit down and talk to Hugo Chavez adding the Venezuelan leader to a long list of enemies he's not speaking to that also includes the Prime Minister of Spain. Someone once complained to Winston Churchill about the endless discussions of the United Nations. "Better talk, talk, talk," he replied, "than war, war, war." On the other hand Churchill was a colonialist who hated Gandhi. But what I'm saying is I want a candidate who sits down with the world. We've already gone to war with "terror" and lost, it's time to try not going to war. It might hurt our pride but there'll be a lot less suffering. For me, the most desirable trait in a president is that he doesn't get us attacked. I mean, remember that big mouth kid that was always getting smacked around by football players three years older than you? You wouldn't put that guy in charge of your group because then, when he started insulting all the meatheads, you would also be in line for a beatdown. It's OK to hang out with the big mouth at your home or in some other enclosed space, but on the schoolyard it's best just to stay away from that guy because you know one day someone's going to shoot a missile up his ass.
I'm also supporting Barack because he's the only candidate who's not George Bush. Plus, he's almost absurdly cool. What sealed it was when he went out in blue jeans and a leather jacket and gave a speech in Pennsylvania.
That picture, on the cover of the New York Times, is one of the coolest photographs of any candidate, anywhere. That same day John McCain cancelled a rally because of rain. I want a rain or shine president who is also a rockstar. Someone who inspires those around me to make sacrifices, even if I don't always make sacrifices with them. Finally, it's important to me that the President of the United States is smarter than me. And if the president dies, on account of being old, I expect the Vice President to be smarter than me too. I want a President who understands plumbers, but I don't want a plumber as Secretary of State.
Barack is supported by Allison Winfield, who I met at the Obama rally in Sunnyside, Florida. Allison's hot enough to melt a Ben and Jerry's ice cream truck on the north pole. At that same rally a group of women screamed from the back bleachers, "We love you Obama!" Barack raised his hand, looking straight ahead, and said, "I love you back." It was a Shaft moment.
In other words, I've spent as much time as allowed and gathered all the information. I've read the Drudge Report and Talking Points Memo. I've seen Matt Drudge swinging in seedy gay clubs near South Beach and Josh Marshall bleary eyed wearing sweat pants at the Democratic Convention. I've come to the only conclusion available to me. For those undecideds left in the American hinterland, I invite you to join me. Make up your mind! Walk the rainbow with me to the polls this Tuesday!
Follow Stephen Elliott on Twitter: www.twitter.com/the_rumpus
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I took my 7 year old to vote with me today and the smile on his face when I showed him Obama's name was something I will remember forever.
Thank you Stephen Elliot for putting your reasons in words and sharing them with us.
A lot of great points were made.
Bravo! Intellectual, edgy and chock full of laughs - loved it!
"Cool" is interesting, because he redefines it.
Usually, "cool" is haughty, aloof, better than everyone. Unfriendly, even remote, surly or cold.
Obama's "cool" is exactly the opposite. He's making a middle aged man who is openly warm and loving--not just to his wife and kids but to complete strangers--"cool". He is, in a way, the anti-cool, the opposite of a snob.
He gives the impression he loves all of us. Sincerely.
Making -that- attitude, that warmth, "cool" for a 47 year old man in politics is quite a feat.....
I enjoy your brutal honesty. This article was also very funny. Good post!
That was a brilliant analogy you drew about deregulation and the "mark".
It's obvious some people missed the humor in this piece.
Obama: Unqualified, but cool. And what else do you need? Not like he's running for president or anything!
Wow some people have no sense of humor.
Palin much?
Actually, Sen. Obama is over-qualified.
He IS "almost absurdly cool"... that's not why he got my vote, but it is still a dead straight fact.
And he's not Bush... and he's not McCain- Those ARE contributing factors to his having won my vote.
"My father used to say if you sit at a poker table and you don't see the mark, you're the mark. If you're in favor of deregulation and you're not rich, you're the mark."
Brilliant!
I was at that rainy rally in PA last week--it was awesome.
I'd already voted when that rally took place, but watching the footage of him and all of those wonderful, shivering people who braved the weather to hear him... man, made me wish I could vote all over again- I'd cast the exact same ballot, but it would have been with that image in my mind.
Funny! I like this post! You have quite an "eclectic" bibliography, Stephen. Not too many people have written both erotica and political commentary!!! I am impressed!
I feel there is only ONE man with:
The Vision to See
The Faith to Believe
The Courage to Do
I've already cast my early ballot for Senator Barack Obama & Senator Joe Biden. Join Me.
Stephen, I wish you actually knew what you were talking about. Already lost the war on terror? What news have you been watching?? I love how you liberals cover up the truth to to push your own agendas. We have not had an attack on U.S. soil since 9/11when the war on terror began. Terror attacks are at it's lowest point since the invasion of Iraq. There has been some shift of terror attacks in Afghanistan but that alone does not mean we lost the war on terror either. The world experiences terror attacks on a daily basis which has nothing to do with the U.S. or its policies. Lost the war on terror?? please go back and educate yourself on the facts. We are kicking the terrorists rear ends!!
Hey Nate, did you miss your nap today?
Seems like you McCainiacs are getting a little cranky.
Have no fear in four years you all can try again.
Before 9/11 it was 8.5 years since a foreign terrorist attack on the US. During that time, the world experienced terrorist attacks on a daily basis which had nothing to do with the US or its policies. Please go back and educate yourself on the facts.
Oh, really? Good to know. That, uh, tone of indifference you're hearing? That's no one giving a crap what you think. I think you need to return your degree from DeVry for using a sentence like "People throw around the term "middle class" like it applies to everyone" as part of a political editorial.
The undecided voter is the most overvalued, idiotic person on the face of the earth.
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