Gay and Lesbian Manners: The Great Oral Sex Dilemma
Q: What do you do when a guy comes in your mouth?
A: It's an age-old predicament and one with no simple answer. Of course, it makes a big difference how well you know the guy. An anonymous trick is not the same as a boyfriend who is not the same as your husband. But communication and planning will get you through this sticky situation every time.
Even if you feel embarrassed talking about sex (especially with someone new), discuss your preferences beforehand. If you're the shooter, ask your friend if it's okay to come in his mouth and, in any case, give a little warning before you do ("Hey, I'm about to shoot!") Similarly, let your partner know if you plan on spitting it out -- or if you don't want him coming in your mouth at all.
Whatever you decide, if you're expecting a mouthful, follow the Boy Scout motto: Be prepared. By that I mean, think ahead about what exactly you're going to do with this "load" and make the proper arrangements beforehand. If you know you're going to spit it out, it's a good idea to have a box of tissues or a hand towel at your side. If you're planning to swallow, make sure you have a glass of water nearby.
The safest practice, of course, is to use a condom (yes, even with oral sex). HIV risk is believed to be very low from this particular activity but lots of other STDs are easily transmitted through oral sex. In fact, if you happen to know that you or your partner has an STD, you should not have unprotected oral sex under any circumstance.
Note for Straights: Heterosexuals gets STDs, too. Know your risks. If you're the guy, make sure she's comfortable with the plan and don't forget to reciprocate.
Steven Petrow is the author of "The Essential Book of Gay Manners & Etiquette." Visit him on the Web at www.gayandlesbianmanners.com
Follow Steven Petrow on Twitter: www.twitter.com/spetrow
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These are manners applicable to oral sex between any two people. I don't know why the author has to label these as "gay and lesbian manners." It's too divisive.
When I first came out one of my first tricks was a very hot guy who picked me up in the West Village in NY. I didn't know a thing and didn't know what I was doing; I only knew I wanted him bad, so he takes me back to his place and pushes my legs up in the air and YIIKES! All of a sudden I got this burning sensation and it wasn't from the chili I had had at lunch; he used menthol shaving cream for lube!
Of course these days I always talk about sex beforehand and preferences. I was too embarrasesed when young to do it. It used to be where guys were turned off by someone who asked, "What are you into?" but I learned if they can't or refuse to talk about it to just play with myself instead of them.
Just when you think public discourse couldn't go any lower....
Is that a pose, or do you really think that?
Do you think Gov. Palin might wish her eldest daughter had experimented with something less than intercourse and had thereby avoided bein an unwed mother of an illegitimate child at the age of 18?
How is that going lower? Perhaps some shame issues around sex and sexuality?
I appreciate being informed. Public discourse needs to be more candid.
Thank GOD I found this article before I went on that date tonight.
What about lesbian oral sex or males who use oral to pleasure women? How does 1 deal with female discharge into or around the mouth?
Well, for starters, I would not refer to it as 'discharge' in front of her
LMAO!!!
LOL!!!!
Mr Petrow, would gargling be socially acceptable?
(I cannot stop laughing. Even I - who thought I'd seen it all - was flabbergasted to see this article on this website. Whatever next?!)
think of it more as foreplay to the weekend than the breakfast of champions.
Good Gawd, Huffpo! Why does this belong here??? I just had breakfast!
Then don't read it! Problem solved!
Hmmm, just had breakfast and yet couldn't help clicking on the link "THE GREAT ORAL SEX DILEMMA." I call BS.
You know you wanted to see what this was about. Besides what does oral sex have to do with your breakfast? Just a normal fact of life.
Cum and get it!
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