Weather Declared "Socialist"

In a stunning development, several marginal Republican senators and congressmen from small districts with very few people living in them have declared the weather as "socialist".

Apparently rankled over the fact that rain, snow, wind, heat and all other phenomena connected with weather effects gays, minorities, women seeking abortions and illegal aliens in addition to the normal American citizen, the Republicans have sought to write an amendment which would formally declare the once-thought-to-be innocent natural occurrence as "a product of tax and spend, big government liberalism championed by the leader of the Democrat party and maybe even president Obama hisself."

Sleet was mysteriously left off the list of offensive weather conditions.

While the Republican representatives have run into criticism, neither the major news organizations nor Republican party leaders have lent their opinions. Fox News, however, has issued a statement saying it would send ace reporter Brian Kilmeade into suspected weather hot spots around the country -- streets, fields, rooftops, alleys -- to get to "the truth and stuff".

In other late breaking news, Israeli psychopath Orly Taitz tells sources close to this reporter that President Obama was never actually born at all and has documents to prove it.