A friend of mine who works in an office of only women confessed she still hides her tampon in her sleeve on her way to the bathroom. "You're embarrassed someone will know you're menstruating?" I asked, incredulous. "But they're all female!" She laughed, self-consciously. "Yeah, I know," she agreed, "it's weird. Why should they care? In fact, why do I?"
So why is menstruation still such a taboo subject?
You might not think it is, considering all the TV commercials for menstrual suppression, the tampon and pad ads in magazines, even the occasional menstrual reference in shows like The Family Guy and Saturday Night Live and movies like Superbad. Yet let's face it ... none of those exactly contribute to what you'd call a real discussion or actual dialogue. At best, they're pitches and jokes that basically use our poor ol', much-maligned bodily process to get an easy laugh and/or earn a buck.
It's not just in the media. How many smart, accomplished females do you know who still feel self-conscious buying "femcare", especially from a male clerk? How many of them wryly refer to an unexpected "visit" from "their friend"? Who wouldn't just die, die, die of total mortification if she leaked or bulged or accidentally dropped a tampon out of her bag? How many of us have even questioned terms we take for granted, like "sanitary" pads and feminine "hygiene" ... words that imply it's an inherently disgusting function to begin with? And how many superstitions and old wives' tales do we still cling to unconsciously: that menstrual blood is poisonous, that you shouldn't swim, that a tampon can get lost inside you, that you can't get pregnant if you have sex during your period?
Period shmeriod, you might be thinking to yourself, eyes rolling heavenwards. You may feel, like many do, that you know about as much as you need to about the whole subject, thank you very much. Why talk about something so personal? What's so interesting about something so predictable and icky? Why even go there?
Believe it or not, there are issues at stake, big issues. For starters, there's our health. For those old enough to remember, Toxic Shock Syndrome and women dying from tampons was an early 80s thing that went the way of big hair and lace mitts. True, tampon manufacturers have since removed the most dangerous ingredients; but did you know there are still cases of TSS every year? There are other questions about tampon safety... not the urban legend ones (like asbestos, which FYI is definitely not added to make us bleed more), but possible health ramifications of all the trace elements of bleach, "fragrance," wax, surfactants, and even (Lord love a duck) dioxin we so blithely stick up our lady parts every month.
There are also money issues. Even wonder why toilet paper, soap, towels, and tissue are generally free in public restrooms but not pads or tampons? Ever wonder why femcare is considered a "non-essential good" and is therefore subject to sales tax in many states? Ever wonder why the price of femcare goes up, while the number of tampons in a carton goes down? What can you, Jane Consumer, do about it? Are there other options out there?
Then there's the environment. The average woman uses up to 10,000 tampons in her life and will throw away a total of approximately 250 to 300 pounds of pads, plugs and applicators -- quite the footprint, if you care about such things. If a single disposable diaper take approximately four zillion years to decompose, what about our femcare? What about all those plastic applicators you invariably step on while cavorting barefoot on the beach? And while we're on the subject, what's with all the packaging? Pads and tampons don't have to be sterile and yet are embalmed in more plastic than the special-occasion sofa in your great-aunt's living room. We're not even including the environmental cost of manufacturing, which is considerable, even with supposedly green choices made of organic cotton. What are we to do?
We say it's high time for a little more transparency. Let's perform a communal end-run around the usual secrecy and embarrassment. Let's wrest control of this deeply personal topic away from the forces that have controlled it for so long. Armed with information and insight, maybe we can even figure out how to bring up the subject, in polite company, without dying of mortification. Perhaps that way, we can spark a genuinely meaningful dialogue with ourselves, our friends, and our families about this most basic of functions ... and how it affects us all.
Rachel Kramer Bussel: Book Trailer 101
Time for a revival of courage and educating ourselves each other and our planet!
www.periodfairy.com.
thank you. and thank you for the great book ladies, I really enjoyed it.
We need to have PSAs about menstruation. There are plenty of actresses - young and old - who could talk about not only the process, but how they dealt with it over the years.
Seriously, there's got to be better things to say about the topic than G. Gordon Liddy's nasty remarks about Sonia Sotomayor's menstruation.
Amen to whoever mentioned Diva Cups below! A great reusable way of handling things, though, I admit, before I had children I probably would have considered such a thing "gross". Further back in the teen years, menstruation seemed like such a horrible ordeal. Well, having uterine cramps and back pain monthly isn't necessarily fun, either, and for those who suffer PMS and other hormonal issues it's not exactly a great experience to have, but when everything is "flowing smoothly," it's just a part of life!
As a man, I have been fascinated by the menstrual cycle for years but especially during my med school years.
However I could never get anyone to help me get a better understanding of it & by that I'm not referring to the biological reasons. This was also in the pre-Internet years so the only source of education for me were the outdated, generic books sometimes found at the school library, covered with dust.
I came across a menstrual cup a decade ago at the health food store, made out of natural rubber that would require emptying, especially on the heavier days but they are great for saving the environment.
Well, we are fast approaching 2010 & I still can't get anyone to talk to me about the subject. Ladies have been understandably frustrated by us men for centuries but there are still five or six of us willing to listen & learn.
One of my biggest question is, are there any direct or indirect connection between the moon's cycle & your cycle?
I personally have nothing to gain from this knowledge, financially, just a better understanding.
GodYesOrNo.com
I'm a classic introvert & I would totally understand if you wouldn't wish to share any more than you have already but if you do, what more can you tell me about the connection please?
Nice to see a non-industry associated research centre for women's health.
Wise because you decided to go against what the society & the industry, led by men, have been telling you what to do, how & when to do it......
Have you ever heard of or tried the cup?
They were terribly messy to remove. I then made my own tamppons using sea sponges cut to size. No strings so I had to fish a little but I liked them and saved a ton of money on commercial products. Just wash them in warm soapy water, dry on a sunny windowsill and good to go.
My 13 and 15 year old daughters don't know I know they started their periods. I'm quite sure they would die of embarrasment if I talked about it.
in religion. The Bible, Koran & Talmud all make menstruation to
be some evil thing to be shunned at all costs. Think of the women
in places like Africa who have to go sit in the bush for a week and
those who are not allowed to cook. Those "holy" scriptures by the
way were all written by men.
Now isn't amazing how women are so much more religious than men?
GodYesOrNo.com
Some forms of these conditions arise from injuries to pelvic nerves during childbirth; in nulliparous women they arise from persistent straining in the bathroom.
We should be talking about menstruation, bowel habits and how we should be delivering our babies - in a safe way that prevents these avoidable injuries.
www.endometriosisexplained.blogspot.com
I wonder what percentage of women would take a pill (if it was safe, with no side effects) to stop mensturation?
I'm seriously thinking about shelling out for the Implanon implant at my next annual exam. The only reason I haven't already is that my insurance won't cover it.
Once in a while I'll have a period in spite of the pill, usually because of high amounts of stress, but in general it works like a charm.
I can tell you about some horrible cases that I learned of while attending both allopathic & naturopathic medical schools on those birth-control methods.
The side effect are just too many to go through right now.
I realize that I'm just a man with no clue as to exactly what you are going through but I do know that side effects are something to consider, please.