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6 Tips for Choosing a Meditation Practice

Posted: 09/03/11 12:03 PM ET

When I started practicing meditation in 1995, I didn't tell too many people about it for fear they would think I had joined a cult or turned into some kind of new-aged oddball. If I mention it today, however, I'm more likely to be greeted by comments like, "I just came back from a 10-day silent Vipassana retreat," or "Yes, my doctor told me I should meditate to stabilize my blood pressure." I knew that this ancient practice had officially entered our culture when I saw a billboard advertising a new sleeping pill called Zazen. It's here.

Now, we're faced with a plethora of choices for developing a meditation practice. I say go for it! Explore the practice of "Vipassana" or "Insight Meditation." Ask your doctor to refer you to a clinic where they teach mindfulness based stress reduction, which is connected to Vipassana. Visit your local Shambhala center or another Tibetan Buddhist center and learn "Shamatha" or the practice of tranquility. Try "Zazen" (the Zen meditation practice, not the sleeping pill).

There are many other forms of meditation practice, but as a Buddhist, these are the ones I am familiar with and can vouch for. And as you do your research, I suggest you consider these parameters:

  1. Choose a practice that is rooted in a lineage that is older than, say, 2,500 years. Not saying you have to adopt another culture or act Eastern, just that it's good to find something time-tested and honed. Thus, you can have confidence. Confidence in the practice is always step one along the spiritual path. When you know it is genuine, you relax and listen more closely.
  2. Learn the technique from someone who has been trained to teach it. Teaching meditation is more than an explanation, it is a transmission. It is passed down from one who has learned from his teacher, who learned from her teacher, and so on. The longer the chain, in some sense, the greater the power of the practice.
  3. Don't accept anything watered down or instant. There are many skillful and intelligent ways to present the practice of meditation simply, and I'm not referring to any such attempts. Just that meditation takes effort and will at some point be uncomfortable and boring. Any practice that promises otherwise should be investigated especially carefully. Stay away from things that can be done in five, seven or 57 steps. It's just not that simple.
  4. Don't make stuff up. This is one area of life where it's really important to follow the instruction very closely and exactly. At some point in your practice, maybe you'll figure out some personal tweaks to the technique, but hold all tweaks for months, years and lifetimes. The thing with practices that are this long-standing is that they are soaked in wisdom. All the tricks you can think of to avoid looking at your own life have already been tried by countless individuals in all sorts of cultures. The practice has been built to foil all such trickery. Thus, no detail is casual. It's all there for a reason. Respect and love the technique and it will respect and love you back.
  5. Make it very, very personal.At the same time, whatever practice you do, it will only come to life when you make it personal. There are wonderful guides who can help you enter the practice, and maybe at some point you will even find a teacher. In any case, at every step, you are on your own and charged with bringing what you have learned into your own life. You have got to figure it out on your own. Don't take anyone's word for anything. Trust, verify. Trust, verify. Repeat. Repeat. Repeat. Your experience is the path; there is no other path. So stick with practices that encourage deep inward looking and personal responsibility.
  6. Avoid practices that suggest the point is transcendence or bliss. The point of practice is to be here. If you don't know how to be here, how are you supposed to know what you're transcending to or away from? And no one even knows what bliss is, anyway. I don't. All I know is that it's something other than feeling super happy and untouched by anything. (When asked what bliss felt like, Tibetan meditation master Choygam Trungpa said, "To you, it would probably feel like pain.") Practice makes you more human, not less. This may not get you to a perfectly peaced-out state, but it will do something way better and, let's face it, more practical: It will make you more authentic. More human. More open and tender and thus of far more use (and interest) to your fellow humans.

Welcome to your life! Practice introduces you to the brilliant, confused, grumpy, joyful and deeply tender person that you already are and opens door after door for this amazing being to enter the phenomenal world -- for her benefit, yes, but also for the benefit of all sentient beings. So look for a practice that appreciates happiness and lightness, sure, but doesn't turn away from sadness or darkness. Look for something emphasizes compassion, love, tenderness and dedication to becoming fully human.

Definitely try things out; however, at some point it is important to choose one path (or no path -- this is best for some folks) and stay with that way.

Thoughts? Ideas? Questions? Please post below.

 
 
 

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When I started practicing meditation in 1995, I didn't tell too many people about it for fear they would think I had joined a cult or turned into some kind of new-aged oddball. If I mention it today, ...
When I started practicing meditation in 1995, I didn't tell too many people about it for fear they would think I had joined a cult or turned into some kind of new-aged oddball. If I mention it today, ...
 
 
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03:07 PM on 09/23/2011
I don't think it is about transcendence, bliss, shamatha, etc, but more about motivation. The motivation to de-stress, bliss-out, and feel good is great, but the motivation to practice to develop yourself in order to be able to most effectively help others would seem to lead to a much more profound and all-encompassing practice.

Second, it is great to say that we are all already enlightened, and we just need to sit down and be in the moment and all is groovy. But there is a simple reason that we aren't all acting like enlightened people. That reason is that simple is hard. If you can just sit down, access your true nature, rest in the present and benefit others along the way without any teachings, amazing! But for the vast majority of people, we need guidance on how uncover our true nature and practices to help us along the way.

Even if you can realize your nature by yourself (trial and error), why not rely on the experiences and teaching of millions of others just like you who have been running the same experiments for thousands of years? If you wanted to learn math, you could just try on your own and probably figure out some basics through logic and experimentation, but why not go to a teacher who can guide you along the way. You still have to do the work and gain the wisdom, but a teacher can point you in the right direction.
03:46 PM on 09/11/2011
First, great article, Susan. Nice take on things.

Personally, I think 2500 years is a bit much. I think even a christian can find a useful way to meditate within their own faith, should they feel inclined to go that way. Time-tested is terrific, certainly, but not of necessity better. I myself am guilty of turning to the eastern masters more than once because, after all, if you want the voice of experience that is certainly the best place to start looking for it.

I would, however, like to add that meditation (in the classical sense) is not for everyone. I've noted among the other comments pointed references to persons who feel it has failed them, and your take on that seems to be that they have simply not found the right teacher. In some cases, that may be the truth, but it is also true that meditation is not a panacea, and some people simply do not have the temperament for it. For those who don't have the temperament, they can find that it makes them miserable, and in that case, perhaps they need to find another path, better suited to them.

In many cases, any well-loved hobby can be one person's approach. There is no One True Path. I sincerely doubt there is even One True Destination.
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06:08 PM on 09/05/2011
In my experience, meditation is the most personal thing you can do for yourself. Meditation is not a practice or a technique, nor is it a tool that you can acquire from anyone or anything, or practice at a specific time or place, but it's a natural state of mind all the time, awake or asleep. Only tool you need is your readiness to take the most brutal and honest look at yourself and accept both human and divine nature in you. You can never truly acquire it by seeking it, but most likely when you give yourself up to it (the super power however you may address it).
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Susan Piver
Writer, Shambhala Buddhist teacher/student
06:17 PM on 09/05/2011
I agree that it is highly personal. However, it is good to have some guidance now and then, especially from traditions that are skilled in teaching you how to cultivate such readiness and acceptance--in your own personal way.
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somewhatodd
micro-bio undetectable to the naked eye
02:48 PM on 09/05/2011
i don't sing so harmoniously but i love to anyway, kirtan, especially with kitzie stern ~

http://newworldkirtan.com/
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Priscilla Warner
Author of Learning to Breathe, co-author of The Fa
11:34 AM on 09/05/2011
Thanks so much for this article. I especially liked the tip to make a practice "very, very personal." When I decided to learn how to meditate, after suffering from a panic disorder for decades, I was overwhelmed at the amount of information that exists. I sat down at my computer and researched all of the teachers and techniques I could find. (More are turning up daily, by the way...) When I found the teachers, techniques and treatments that spoke to me, I tried them and made a judgment on my own about how effective they were for me, personally. Although I hope many people will benefit from the experiences I share with them, I also hope they will feel empowered by articles like this, and that they will sit and decide for themselves what works best for their own hearts, minds, bodies and brains.
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Saijanai
Micro bio? We don't need no stinkin' micro bio...
02:00 PM on 09/05/2011
I admire your fortitude AND your financial resources. I assume you took a formal TM class from the official TM organization and went through the entire followup program for at least the official 4 months (a year or more of free checking would have been better of course), before you decided that TM wasn't right for you?
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Saijanai
Micro bio? We don't need no stinkin' micro bio...
10:56 PM on 09/05/2011
This ended up under a different message than I responded to so it makes no sense.
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Susan Piver
Writer, Shambhala Buddhist teacher/student
05:43 PM on 09/05/2011
Thank you for sharing your experience, Priscilla, and may your practice bring benefit to you and everyone else.
09:20 AM on 09/05/2011
My practice has helped me to play nice with others, virtually and actually. No need to argue over an opinion, though that statement may be taken for an argument here. I'm new at the whole thing but I can see a benefit and appreciate training my capacity to interrupt the chatter.
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jennielake
Intellect is Learned... Wisdom Already Knows
04:15 AM on 09/04/2011
This is easy...

Find a teacher who has "experienced" and "understands" the difference between...

Intellectual and Experiential Meditation.

Most teachers are not self-realized and can only "Teach" a Method however, you are that which does not need to be taught.

You are only an Ah-Ha away from this realization and do not need to be taught how to be that which you already are - however a good teacher can help you walk along the path - but do not be dependent on them, nor build a belief creating another door you must walk through to see with-in.

Look up - Papaji

... many years ago he helped me see that which cannot be seen with the eyes.

Most of all however, find the truth of that which does not change even with meditation - you are that!

Much love, and I honor everyone who is reading any of these posts - you are on a wonderful path.
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soma77
Author, Speaker, Retreat Facilitator
09:39 PM on 09/03/2011
Just sit in silence, being, don't choose a meditation because it will choose you. Start where you are and you can always change. The good thing is it always comes back to silence, just being and one can sit in silence with music playing.
05:14 PM on 09/03/2011
Susan, why the slam at transcending??
I have practiced Transcendental Meditation for several decades and it would help if you actually tried it yourself b/4 the heavy negative judgments. Transcending is into the Source...the Unified Field that is now scientifically proven to exist as the ancient Vedic texts described it over 8,000 years ago.

Millions of people happily practice Transcendental Meditation worldwide.
The long list of outstanding health effects, body, mind emotions and spirit have been rigorously and scientifically studied with meditators wired up in laboratories and proven beyond any doubt, (and far more than any other form of Meditation, as you know.)
Google Transcendental Meditation and read a few of the countless investigated and proven excellent effects. Why put down a deeply valued ancient Vedic Meditation, from which Buddhism actually sprang?? Read the history of Buddhism.
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Susan Piver
Writer, Shambhala Buddhist teacher/student
09:16 AM on 09/04/2011
I don't think I said anything negative about TM in this post and since I personally have no idea what Source is, I can't refer to it. Similarly, I find that when transcending comes up (not TM, btw, just the idea of transcending), it seems to connote escape. What I was trying to say (without success) was that there is no need to strive or work to take yourself anywhere other than where you already are.

I'm sure there are many people who have benfitted from TM.

Thank you for sharing the fruits of your meditation practice.
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Saijanai
Micro bio? We don't need no stinkin' micro bio...
01:13 PM on 09/04/2011
I see, so which technique, other than Transcendental Meditation, talks about the things you warn against?
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Klarsonent
Semi-retired landlady, small business entrepreneur
02:12 PM on 09/05/2011
I have to side with "Kat119" on your #6 comment "Avoid practices that suggest the point is transcendence or bliss." Being in the "here and now" will lead you to transcendence, eventually.

TM is not the ONLY way to arrive at the higher states of consciousness - but it is ONE way.
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Klarsonent
Semi-retired landlady, small business entrepreneur
02:13 PM on 09/05/2011
I agree with your first question. I was wondering the same thing myself. Give her time. If she keeps meditating, the Light will direct her.
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exxman
I Am The 99%
02:16 PM on 09/03/2011
"Avoid practices that suggest the point is transcendence or bliss."

Oh, the TM'ers aren't going to like this one bit.
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Saijanai
Micro bio? We don't need no stinkin' micro bio...
02:14 AM on 09/04/2011
Hey. Buddhists insist that TM is just a simplistic form of Shamatha (calm abiding meditation). TMers, in turn, suggest that Shamatha is merely a distortion of TM.
Who you going to believe?

Well, Tibetan monks have been found to be suffering from PTSD to the point where they can't meditate. OTOH, combat veterans who have had to kill a dozen or more people and see even more of their comrades die in the same day, find that TM is easy to practice and is beneficial for their PTSD.

What ya gonna do?
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jennielake
Intellect is Learned... Wisdom Already Knows
04:20 AM on 09/04/2011
You can be still to see that which is before these thoughts - that which does not change.

See beyond the concepts the mind creates, and then suffers from its own creation.

- see beyond the creation that changes, to see that which does not change.

You are that.
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Susan Piver
Writer, Shambhala Buddhist teacher/student
09:18 AM on 09/04/2011
Meditation is not a competitive sport. Different practices work for different people. And btw, in my travels as a meditation teacher, I never heard anyone suggest that TM is a simplistic form of shamatha.
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playflute2
flootz
12:15 PM on 09/03/2011
Thanks, Susan. A very insightful article with some excellent cautions about choosing and practicing meditation. There are too many 'new age' kinds of programs out there.
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Susan Piver
Writer, Shambhala Buddhist teacher/student
09:19 AM on 09/04/2011
Thank you so much and I'm glad you found this valuable.
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Saijanai
Micro bio? We don't need no stinkin' micro bio...
12:06 PM on 09/03/2011
You said:
"Don't accept anything watered down or instant. There are many skillful and intelligent ways to present the practice of meditation simply, and I'm not referring to any such attempts. Just that meditation takes effort and will at some point be uncomfortable and boring. Any practice that promises otherwise should be investigated especially carefully. Stay away from things that can be done in five, seven or 57 steps. It's just not that simple."

But it IS that simple. In fact, simple is better. Easy is better. No effort is best. You might disagree, but tell that to THIS guy:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4ziJMW0m2zU

DId you watch the video and still say what you said above?
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jennielake
Intellect is Learned... Wisdom Already Knows
11:59 AM on 09/04/2011
... simply said

This man has not found the right teacher, and to post it in the emotional way it has been posted shows that you hun have not found a self-realized teacher to assist you as well - your hurt shows and my heart extends out to you.

Hugs to you and may you seek out a better understanding to find the path that is avail to you - beyond memories and mental images of the past.

Truth be told - Meditation takes no effort, self-realization does not take time, and the intellect only gets in the way. May someday you find such an understanding, and if there is a reaction to this post ask... "Who" is reacting? Mind! ... and who is "Aware" of Mind Reacting?

Simply sit with this for just a moment - see that which is Aware... beyond the thoughts, reactions and belief systems. And in this the path has been opened up for a depth of understanding and awareness never seen before. In this you will find peace.

much love to you my friend...
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Saijanai
Micro bio? We don't need no stinkin' micro bio...
01:17 PM on 09/04/2011
Simply said: you are like a full cup of tea, inviting others to be just like you.
12:12 PM on 09/04/2011
This guy went through a process which took years. You lack understanding.
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Saijanai
Micro bio? We don't need no stinkin' micro bio...
01:19 PM on 09/04/2011
Are you referring to Dan Burks? The process he describes happened the first time he meditated. It is an accumulative thing, of course, but my point (and his, if you asked him) is simply that simplicity works.
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Saijanai
Micro bio? We don't need no stinkin' micro bio...
01:26 PM on 09/04/2011
BTW, a pilot study on PTSD in Iraq combat vets with PTSD was just published. After 8 weeks of TM, their symptoms were reduced by 50%. While it is certainly true that it can take years to repair the results of stressful events, a 50% reduction in symptoms in 8 weeks is phenomenal.