Welcome to our annual awards! For the past three years, this column has paid homage (translation: "ripped off their gimmick") to the McLaughlin Group...

Ahh the hell with it....this is too great a day for goofy (not to mention pointless) satire. We've had eight years of someone enjoying himself at the expense of the country. Now, mercifully, this country may finally have a President.

"Dead woman running, still" -- Hillary Clinton Denies her campaign has Completed its course; But, out of reflex, or Rigormortality Forces Obama to Be...

As soon as the California polls closed pushing Obama over 270, Democratic wives around the country exploded in frenzied ecstasy as a tidal wave of unabashed married sex swept the country.

After eight years of failed American policy in the Middle East, President Obama has the chance to reassert constructive American leadership in one of the most complex geopolitical regions of the world.

Given conservative Republicans' beliefs that Obama is a far left candidate, the more moderate (in their view) Senator Clinton may become a more acceptable choice for Secretary of State.

We still do not have a final Presidential result in the state of Missouri, 14 days after the election. As was shown time and again this election, our nation's voting systems are badly broken.

With the post-election analysis season almost over, it's worth taking one final look at some of the characters who ensured President-elect Obama would make it to the White House.

Ever since Obama's historic election as the first African-American President, the pundits have been trying to demystify the voter attitudes and behavior that led to this unprecedented outcome.

In a poll commissioned by Planned Parenthood, Catholic voters' number-one response on family planning concerns were "too many unwanted children in America whose parents can't take care of them."

If the last seven days have been any indication, the far-right is shaping up to make the 1990s seem quaint -- even erudite by comparison.

Unmarried women's crucial role in electing Obama is underscored by the "marriage gap" between their political preferences and those of married women.

Some soldiers' opinions I recently wrote about are theirs to have, even though they may be highly unpopular. Being unpopular does not, however, make their opinion any less valid nor criminal.

In the end, Barack Obama's win may have handed John McCain the keys he needed, if not necessarily wanted.

How long is the honeymoon going to last?

We must lay the foundation for the next generation of youth, so we can continue to capitalize on their energy, innovation, and creativity for the future.

Though Europeans generally rejoiced in Barack Obama's election as 44th President of the US, a number of leading European lawmakers and journalists have made "foot-in-mouth comments."

On both values and issues, moderates line up with liberals to form a strong majority that isolates conservatives. Conservatives have had their day. This is a center-left, not a center-right nation.

On November 5th, I examined the red, weary eyes of my fellow taxpayers, which showed the residue of a sleepless night spent checking every news channel to see if it was really true.

In selecting his team, Obama should look to future opportunities -- to how he can help solve the critical problems of the nation and the world -- and not to past obligations.

It was a different Obama, with a different voice, that I heard at the press conference on Friday. He appeared to be flip and full of himself.

A change in the amendment process for states will not always ensure the protection of minority rights. But it will encourage consistency. It will deter attacks on specific groups of people.

On the critical issue of government's role, Democrats do not have a mandate. Rather, they have a chance to make their case.