I am yet to be convinced that policies such as not hiring or going as far as firing smokers is a better solution than devoting resources to helping them quit (and work).

Besides taking a lot of blood, sweat and tears, relying on self-control to change our habits may not work so well because, well, we run out of blood, sweat and tears. When our tank is empty, that habit comes rushing back with a vengeance.

So being dropped on a deserted island may help you quit, but you may have to be ready to stay there . . . permanently.

The key is finding the joy in between the peaks -- paying attention to the moments, to the joy in the creating of your dreams, and to the pride you feel in yourself. Even if no one else ever acknowledges what you're doing, this is the true objective.

As a psychologist who studies motivation, I spend a lot of time trying to figure out why people give up too soon when trying to reach a goal. But the truth is, a lot of us suffer from the opposite problem: not knowing when, or how, to quit.

As I've found out, throwing in the towel on a dead-end job (or a toxic relationship) is actually really difficult, even when you really want to. Here's why.