Even if I haven't devoted a noteworthy portion of my life to the soul-enriching experience of drooling over Ben or Brad or Bob or Byron, I've still learned some important things from The Bachelor. (And no, the list doesn't include "important people's names all start with the letter B.")
It took a full 30 seconds for the cast of Kevin Smith's "Comic Book Men" to make their first penis joke. Immediately, we realized the show would do little to dispel any of the stereotypes associated with comic store owners and staff.
I'll never forget sitting in front of the TV watching the test pattern in anticipation of the greatest children's program of all time to appear on that sweet small screen, hearing Buffalo Bob Smith say: "Hey, kids, what time is it?"
When I saw last week that Ryan Seacrest Productions had an upcoming reality show based on the lives of wealthy LA-based Iranian-Americans called the Shahs of Sunset, I did what any self-respecting, tech-friendly Iranian-American would do.
The new setup might actually be good news for the contestants, who will have one less routine to learn each week. On the downside, where will we get to watch Enrique Iglesias and Pitbull perform their latest pop/reggaeton crossover hit?
Watch five minutes of Toddlers & Tiaras, TLC's controversial reality show featuring virtual infants learning all the wrong life lessons in the guise of a beauty pageant, and tell me the world isn't coming to an end.