Instead of buying traditional favors, the family had donated the money to a scholarship fund in Sean's brother's name. And in that way, he was there with us. While it was difficult for everyone to hear of the loss, it was uplifting to know that our presence had contributed to helping others.
Of course, there are traditions that should be considered and elements that will make a wedding timeless. But it is their wedding, and it is perfectly okay to shake things up, make traditions their own, and make their own rules.
When I went to my vendors and friends I would present my "brief." I would say "think vintage, 1950's, 4th of July, fancy, family picnic; parasols, grassy, happy, warm, swingy. The colors are watermelon, kiwi and sunflower yellow."
You are not a bridezilla. You have not been planning this wedding since you were three and Barbie and Ken were your role models for love. You want a simple, meaningful, shenanigan-free wedding and you have somehow ended up a crazy person.