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Tara Fass

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'I Wish': A Tale of Two Brothers, Two Cities and a New Bullet Train

Posted: 05/14/2012 6:00 pm

"I Wish" is a touching modern day folk tale created by Hirokazu Kore-eda ("Nobody Knows", "Still Walking"), told from the child-like perspective of two young brothers separated and longing for each other. The movie is built around their innocent hope that their parents will reconcile when the new Japanese bullet train that connects their two cities meets in the middle.

The film's stars are two real-life adorable brothers (Koki and Ohshiro Maeda) who also comprise a comedy duo. Filmed before the Fukishima disaster and released afterwards, its upbeat, bittersweet mood resonated with Japanese audiences and is an apt antidote to the gloominess that besets many families post-separation, particularly when children are involved.

In this multi-generational topsy-turvy world, Mom mopes and Dad is flaky. Both parents are well-meaning, yet dysfunctional Boomers who act like teenagers, having a hard time negotiating adult lives. The brothers pick up the slack by becoming parentified. Dad is an indie musician living with his band. Mom returns to the ancestral home of her aging parents in a town overshadowed by a smoldering, regularly spewing volcano.

Each parent takes the child with them who most resembles their own personality and demeanor. The more serious and somber older son who goes with Mom is preoccupied with hatching the plan to meet and sweeping up the ash that pervades his life. The more cheerful and care-free younger son who goes with Dad tries to grow a vegetable garden to supplement his fast food diet.

As the film opens, we learn the children have not seen each other for six months. Intensely missing each other, but not knowing what their fate is, they are gripped by the possibilities about this new train reuniting them. Although their daily routines are remarkably similar -- filled with school, friends and swim team -- they are very different in their bed and meal time rituals.

The children stay in frequent contact by telephone. During the saddest call, the younger son confesses to his mother his fear that she's mad at him because he reminds her of his father. The parents don't talk at all. The two brothers live under a split custody arrangement that seems to have been decided between the two parents haphazardly, without much thought or consideration for their children's emotional well-being.

The quiet appeal and beauty of "I Wish" is that it entertains and doesn't preach to the choir, advocate for any position or moralize. Appropriate for audiences above the age of 8 or so, it's not intended to be an instructional or a cautionary tale. Divorce is the set up but doesn't have anything really to do with the plot -- it's the harsh reality the boys must adapt to and cope with.

Split custody co-parenting plans are rarely, if ever, ordered by family courts. There is a strong tendency to view marital bonds as ones that may come and go, but sibling bonds are seen as sacred and protective and therefore to be preserved. Keeping sibling units intact is universally seen as a goal.

The decision to separate well-bonded biological children is something that must happen voluntarily by mutual agreements between co-parents; it occurs below the statistical radar.

Who among you have separated your children when you separated from your significant other out of economic or other necessities? What has it been like for the adults and the children? How often do the children see each other? How long do these arrangements last?

Please respond. I'd like to know.

"I Wish" will be released in the United States on May 11, 2012. It is rated PG.

 
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11:52 AM on 05/26/2012
In Japan, custody is not shared and almost always is 100% to the mother with little or no visitation, the father is expected to go away.
RealistBC
Micro-bios must pass muster.
05:24 AM on 05/17/2012
I've seen I Wish. It's a cute movie, but I have to admit that there are some societal aspects of the movie that don't resonate with me due to my cultural ignorance. Don't let this shortcoming of mine keep you from seeing it.
08:27 PM on 05/16/2012
With the rise of divorces and absentee fathers it equals more sexual deviant behavior. More homosexuality too because a boy seeks desperately the approval from his father which he will never get. Thus he seeks it from other men through the volatile emotions that comes through sex. Most people, regardless of sexual orientation, base their relationship first on sex which always fails. Hollywood paints a picture of couples that just met, wake up together after incredible sex, and wow! Their in true faithful love forever and ever. Before the rest of you lamabast me for what I said, I don't care what two men or women do with each other. I'm just calling it for what it is. The new tatooed generation is more promescuois than ever and it's all about self gratification. If it feels good, do it. It must be right cuz my heart says so.
RealistBC
Micro-bios must pass muster.
05:25 AM on 05/17/2012
Go see the movie before you bloviate ignorantly.
05:40 PM on 05/27/2012
I have to say it's an interesting thought I never thought of. The world is not black and white it is mostly gray. People are who they are for so many different reason but I never considered that. Gay or not all people who abide by civil law and are mostly good to each other I have no problem with. Live and let live.
03:24 PM on 05/16/2012
I had a difficult daughter, and had to have her Father take her, because she was out of control at the time. What I did not know is that it was a great relief to her brother, who was younger, fearful for and of her. Neither I nor he has ever reconciled, and we are both ok with that.
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Tukumek Young
08:21 AM on 05/16/2012
Yes it does affect the childen very much , and police take advange of the childrens behavior , as saying they are born like that , as times children act out , not knowing how to act like an adult . There dreams is shattered into milion peaces . Then the father buys and buys and then tell lies after they grow up .
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Evidence House
07:00 AM on 05/16/2012
In America, we say the goal is to keep siblings together, but the courts have different rules and, considerably, different standards when dealing with minorities. For instance, a family court judge (Edward Ginsburg) in Massachusetts - along with G.A.L. Lynda Robbins, of Reading, Ma - decided not to consider the sibling bond when separating my children from my first marriage from their siblings born of my second marriage; stating, "They [my first two] weren't born of the [second] marriage, so, they won't be considered".

This is, simply, the impact of systemic racism in America. Yet, I take advantage of opportunities to get the names of such people out there so others won't have to deal with them in the future; hopefully.
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12:20 PM on 05/16/2012
Legally they can't consider the children born out of the second marriage because your spouse of the second marriage does not have parental rights over them -- other than being a step-parent, they had ZERO legal rights over those kids...zero, none. The spouse of your first marriage has those rights. If the judge determined the best interest for your children of the second marriage meant residing with your spouse, they can't dissolve YOUR parental rights over the children of your first marriage and pass it on to your spouse of the second marriage. The usual reason custody is denied is because 1. You don't have a suitable living arrangement to accommodate multiple children; 2. Your job requires you to travel, work overtime, or pulls you away long enough that it would interfere with the safety and well-being of your children; 3. You have a history of drug/alcohol abuse; 4. You currently reside with someone who has a questionable legal history; or 5. You simply acted like an a** in court.
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Evidence House
12:22 PM on 05/18/2012
None of those issues applied in my case, except - in the case of my ex - his job requirements would and did interfere. In fact, while I understand the concept of children from one marriage not being considered along the lines you state, that wasn't the issue. The issue was, in fact, separating siblings and not taking into consideration the valuable input an honorable administrator could gain from the children.

Instead, these individuals used that rationale to justify disregarding any such input that could have been gained from the children, because they knew it would not suite their hidden agenda. So, they hindered the process as much as possible; even falsely accusing me of kidnapping my children - in an exparte - as we sat at home watching cartoons, while their brothers went to school.

Do you get what I'm saying? These people lied; they acted on their lies; then, they said, "Oh, we made a mistake...", yet, the impact of their lies remained. Nothing changed! Furthermore, they encouraged further abuse as the years went on. The record is clear; yet, they know that no one reads the record. Why would they? They, still, get paid.