iOS app Android app More

Featuring fresh takes and real-time analysis from HuffPost's signature lineup of contributors
Terrence Phearse

GET UPDATES FROM Terrence Phearse
 

If Your Clothes Don't Fit... You Must Acquit

Posted: 12/27/2011 7:04 pm

I think we all remember that steamy summer day in 1995 when Johnny Cochran noted the black leather glove seemed too tight for Simpson to slip on easily. He later exclaimed, "If the glove don't fit, you must acquit."

Whether it be your holiday gifts or that sexy body con dress you are trying to slip back in too soon or after you shed those extra holiday pounds you may have picked up, remember this, if your clothes don't fit you MUST acquit!

I repeat, you MUST acquit!

It is said that first impressions are everything and that people size you up in the first few seconds, so it is no surprise that our appearance communicates things about us... even when we are not aware.

With Christmas behind us and the New Year days away you've [undoubtedly] opened up a lumpy sweater or two from your well-meaning grandmother. I know the Phearse family is guilty of unintentional fashion faux pas gift giving.

It's not always easy shopping for clothes for other people. I have to admit, my mother (she's going to kill me for this) bought my brother the boxiest velvet blazer I've ever seen. As he opened her gift, the room became so quiet, we could hear the crickets chirping. He smiled until she finally exclaimed, "I still have the receipt" with an unsettling grin on her face. Imagine my brother -- a businessman-- walking into a meeting with that boxy, untailored blazer. I'm sure his clients wouldn't have taken him seriously.

The tumultuous white Bronco chase can be likened to my brother's feelings upon opening my mother's boxy blazer gift.

The key to the fashion acquittal is that you are not at all shy about knowing when something isn't going to work for you. Me? I kept it simple, and I opted for accessories on my Christmas list and scored a Reed Krakoff tote. I had cause for concern. Clothing can be tricky.

While on trial (in your closet), deliberate about your holiday items and cross examine them with other key pieces in your wardrobe. If the gifts are lumpy, follow in my brother's footsteps and plead the fifth. As for the pieces in your closet? It's the perfect time of the year to go through and get rid of pieces that you have been wanting to get back in to for the past few years.

"The most important thing to remember is that no body is perfect-- the trick is learning how to artfully disguise the parts you don't love and highlight the ones you do." Adam Glassman noted in the January 2012 issue of O, The Oprah Magazine.

He's right! We come in all shapes and sizes. Although highlighting your assets might be easy, finding a way to disguise your flaws may be tricky.

I subscribe to the belief that no matter what your personal style is make sure you are confident and your seams are in sync with YOUR body. You'll feel neither frumpy nor tight but rather confident and in your comfort zone.

I can't help but think of how many women from Vegas to Virginia are going to try to squeeze into their sexy sparkly essentials alike on New Years Eve. Please, do me one favor before you leave the house. Take a double take in the mirror as you are strapping up your stilettos and spraying your Chanel No. 5 fragrance that's going to land you your lucky kiss at midnight and think to yourself, "Does my dress fit?" And if it doesn't... you MUST acquit.

To that end, remember I'll be following you throughout the streets of New York City and airports throughout the country with my fashion gavel.

Happy New Year!

 

Follow Terrence Phearse on Twitter: www.twitter.com/MrPhearse

FOLLOW STYLE