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Study Blames Moms for Overweight Kids (Dads Get Off Scot-Free)

Posted: 12/29/11 05:30 PM ET

A new study has discovered a link between mother-toddler bonding and teenage obesity. Apparently, if you moms don't connect emotionally with your tykes well enough, it could raise Junior's risk for obesity by the time they're 15. No pressure or anything, but you could make your kid fat.

Okay, two things: First, obviously bonding emotionally with your toddler is an important thing to do for a million reasons. And honestly, I think the vast majority of us get the job done just fine, thank you. I guess I'm not surprised that kids who don't get properly attached to their parents at a young age would grow up to "eat their feelings," which is what appears to be happening. But something irks me about this study: why didn't they study toddlers' relationships with their DADS, too?

It's like there's another study every other day about ways Moms Are Doing It Wrong -- I think I see about 200 studies about moms for every study I see about dads, or at the very least parents in general. It's disappointing that researchers still haven't caught on to the impact both parents can have on children's development. Dads take on more of the childcare than they have in the past -- and that needs to be represented in these child development studies. And if they're not taking on more childcare, doesn't that matter, too?!?

I swear, I scanned the whole article for mention of "dads" or "parents." (The study was published in a print version of the journal, Pediatrics.) All I found was a line saying that this study reinforces other studies about how "toddlers who didn't have close emotional ties with their parents were more likely to be obese by the time they were 4.5 years old." So why didn't this study focus on both parents, too?

I'm not saying this isn't still useful information. It is! I just wish more researchers would start paying more attention to dads. Studies like this one can lend themselves easily to "blame the mom" games. (MY FAVORITE!) Dads don't get off the hook in real life. But when I read stories like these I picture dads off peacefully fly-fishing while moms do all the work and take all the responsibility.

Does it bother you when parenting studies only look at moms?

Written by Adriana Velez on CafeMom's blog, The Stir.

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09:50 PM on 01/02/2012
I worked in a psych hospital in the 1970's, and back then schizophrenia was blamed on the moms, refrigerator moms they were called.

Then it was figured out that it was actually a physical brain condition.

Duh.
09:32 PM on 01/02/2012
Add it to the list of all the other things Mom's are blamed for !! (eye roll and sigh)
08:19 PM on 01/02/2012
Why is the author of this article taking scientific research personally?
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erinbliss
08:41 PM on 01/02/2012
Probaby because the research is seriously one sided against the mother.
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JoanneRM
08:09 PM on 01/02/2012
I'll tell you when children started to get obese. It was when they started to take cooking out of schools. That's right. High schoolers should have to take cooking as sophomores. The kids are obese because their parents don't know how to cook real food for them.

I was in the grocery store last year picking out some frozen dinners because I'm a single senior citizen. I add a salad and fruit. A young couple was looking through the glass doors. He asked her what they were going to have for dinner. She said she though she would cook that night. He asked what, and she said she would heat up fish sticks. That Is Not Cooking! She mentioned the names of their two kids. I hung my head and kept my mouth shut.

I wanted to lead her by the hand to the raw chickens, tell her how to cut it up and broil it or bake it. Show her fresh vegetables, of which there were many nice ones in the store. I wanted to tell her how she could bake potatoes and even buy already put together salad greens. I wanted to tell her how to steam the vegetables in the microwave and they will taste good, and still be good for them. No extra salt. I bought an already cooked chicken to cheer myself up, a box of mixed salad greens, and a jar of popcorn. I couldn't bear to go back there for a few days.
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Ossit
Ossit
08:06 PM on 01/02/2012
More B.S. to blame moms. Dads aren't paid attention to because they still leave most of the work to moms. "Dads take on more of the childcare than they have in the past" Yeah right! I love hearing the whining of stay at home dads who 'release' their childcare once mom gets home. Does he cook dinner? No. Does he bathe the kids once mom is home and the kids are too young to do it themselves? Doubt it. Child care is the responsibility of both. It doesn't stop dads once mom gets home from work so you can sit in front of the tv with remote in one hand, beer in the other and the kid is like another piece of furniture because there's 'ol mom there doing everything else, while you're wiping the sweat off your brow complaining how 'tough' it was during the day..
07:48 PM on 01/02/2012
Wooooooah! My husband had just as much responsibility in the growth and development of our child as I did. Now the kids werent overweight. But the kids that we did know that were porkers -really obese ones chucked off their hugeness when they began walking. My kids were breastfed. They doubled, then tripled their weight by first year, but that was way behind the bottling, cereal kids. My girlfriend, bless her, was putting everything in the bottle, cereal, milk, juice, fruits, vegetables. Her child was absolutely enormous. The hard part was making the kid like individual foods rather than the garbage mix. New mom away from family, on her own,didn't know that this was not what was to be done. My daughter's friend's child was rotund. The mom said she was exactly the same way. That it would all take off by the time she began school. Sure enough toddling ran off everything as she shot up to her tallness. Like her mother she is lithe, tall and beautiful in her school years. I think people can be overly concerned by the percentiles. There are few instances where kids need to be at the 90th, etc. Kids grow, they thrive and can be beautiful petite or tall. My grandkids BMI's are probably not even 17 but they are healthy as horses, ran in the fall, anddo all sorts of activities that keep the all muscle. So did their parents, but they gained in their 30's with thyroid issues.
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07:43 PM on 01/02/2012
so whatever definitions on both bonding and the lack of their defined level of bonding IS what makes a child fat ? as usual blame momma for it all and when does thee study proving that over loving moms fattened their infants and toddlers up leading to adult obesity ? or was this one released back when already ?
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Erica McClellan
Don't Be A D...!
07:42 PM on 01/02/2012
Bull----! I call bull----!
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06:38 PM on 01/02/2012
I no a woman who is sending her child to a therapist because he has a pacifier at age five. It amazes me! Take the damned thing away and DO NOT buy another. Same with food, the kid isn't driving to go get fast food.
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mspat44417
Rock it if ya got it...Music
08:11 PM on 01/02/2012
hahaha no sh*t huh.. it's.Not brain surgery ..
06:32 PM on 01/02/2012
What fathers? Since mass media has made jumping in bed the thing to do, men get the milk for free and don't think they need to stay around for the results. So, basically, we have a new society with many women raising children on their own. Most have to work outside the home and actually day care's are raising these babies. So who is to blame for the obesity and shall I say the dramatic increase in autism?
I wonder...
gamberdm
Common sense = Priceless
06:59 PM on 01/02/2012
Excellent point! Poverty also leads to obesity which is very easy to happen in a single mom family. I swear there is a consortium of people coming up with all this garbage to real and pervasive issues of men "hittin' it and quittin', in marriage or out and abandoning the family they created. If they don't abandon their family, they drive it away with spousal abuse, cheating, neglect, etc.
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scythus
*sigh* because they don't let it trickle down.....
07:51 PM on 01/02/2012
Wow it's all our fault.........who knew that ovaries were the source of good and testicles the source of evil..............
jarostuf
vet,conservative, and calls it like i see it
08:25 PM on 01/02/2012
well keep them knees closed and you wont have that problem.....it takes a village to raise a idiot....and parents to raise a family....its being done other ways but the results are a bit lackluster
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Janet Cooke
09:13 PM on 01/02/2012
You can bet if I had met men with that attitude my knees would have been glued shut.
09:49 PM on 01/02/2012
Another blame the mom when both have sex. And I don't need excuses for that, like "she's the one that gets pregnant". Well, he's then the one that pays child support, men complain about that. So quit trying to shut us up.
screwitall
excellence
06:25 PM on 01/02/2012
If parents contribute to the obesity of their children(and we are aware of the health problems that this causes)why are the parents not charged with endangerment to a child?
11:02 PM on 01/02/2012
Where have you been, they can lose their kids to the state if the child is obese.
screwitall
excellence
11:32 PM on 01/02/2012
I'm not sure what state you live in,but it certainly isn't here.Simply go to one of our Texas malls and start the fat kid count.Maybe the laws are enforced like speeding laws,oblectively.
06:24 PM on 01/02/2012
what a bunch of malarkey. we are a sedentary nation. we don't work in the fields and we don't want for high caloric intake. sometimes genetics plays a part in whether a person has the propensity of becoming overweight. just a lot of psycho babble once more being pandered as something profound.
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07:45 PM on 01/02/2012
if you have kids you will notice that the plump to overweight do have one overweight parent,get picked up/let off via cars instead of walking to their local school and eat the garbage called a school lunch.
05:40 PM on 01/02/2012
This isn't so much about the study [although I can see the merit in it], it's more about blame being placed on the mother and the father isn't mentioned. But .. that seems to be the way in our society. How many people are told they need counseling because of their Mom, not the Dad? How many Mother-in-law jokes are there in comparison to Father-in-law? Women seem to be the target of almost every ail society has, and no surprise really, since men can't seem to bear the burdens that a woman can without crumbling. Blame Mom/Mother-in-law seems to be an all to common thing.
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ladywiccan
a wife, mother and grandmother
04:55 PM on 01/02/2012
years ago when most of our food came from the farmer's market or home grown, with nothing added but a little salt we all ate better, before ipods and cell phones, computers and the Xbox kisd actually played outside or helped in the gardens, if they wanted to talk to a friend they (shutter) walked to their house.
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AbsoluteTruthiness
After the Rapture, can I have your car?
05:34 PM on 01/02/2012
While I agree with most of this, the truth is that the food from your home grown garden or farmers market were raised with toxic chemicals even in the 50's and 60's. My 94 year old Dad up to a few years ago was still HOARDING this evil jar of DDT because he said the government wouldn't let him have it. Huh???? That's the thinking behind that so-called 'healthy food' of the 50's and 60's.

But still, it's gone way downhill from them. Now even if you raise it yourself, it's GMO and classified as PESTICIDES by the FDA. So, this whole 'home grown' is still a myth. And what's in that soil? And what's in that water?

Go organic if you care about your family.
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ladywiccan
a wife, mother and grandmother
06:22 PM on 01/02/2012
when I say farmewr's market I mean road side stands only in rural areas of Washington and oregon what we now call organic. the only fertilizer came from animals on neighboring dairy farmers, , the insecticides were also natural, like lady bugs. Some of the veggies and fruits were not too good looking as none of them were engineered. we checked the soil and water, We didn't use DDT or anything else and still don't
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PaulaMV
Tea parties are for little girls.
04:37 PM on 01/02/2012
We live in a patriarchy, that's why mothers are accused and blamed and not fathers. Freud would have approved of this study!
05:41 PM on 01/02/2012
Hardly, not with single mothers being celebrated as they are. Single fathers are simply a comedic plot device in movies.
gamberdm
Common sense = Priceless
06:56 PM on 01/02/2012
Who celebrates single mothers? Just because someone praises us for carrying the full load of parenthood, often with little to no financial help from the person who helped create the kid(s), doesn't mean we are celebrated. It is hard work and it is unfair to the mom and to the kids.
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JoanneRM
08:24 PM on 01/02/2012
New numbers. Only 51% of adults are married. People take marriage seriously. There are laws that layout legal responsibilities for raising children, and people generally love their children, who also have grandparents, aunts and uncles. But people want to be sure when they pledge themselves to each other. It is a bigger step than having children. Children are forever; marriage is not. In a bad economy, people are less likely to get married, because people would then have to move out of their parents' house, and start a home of their own. That is expensive. A woman can usually stay with her parents with her children.

Also, people with more education are generally more likely to marry than people with less education. That is probably because they have a greater likelihood of getting work. Just because the parents of children are not married, doesn't mean they are not a family, and in fact they may be living together in one home.

The definition of family has changed over the last 40 years, and the rest of the people just have to catch up. That includes the people who write "studies".