The State Of The American Woman

"Time Magazine" just published the results of a landmark survey gauging where America stands on the battle of the sexes. The results show that women are much more powerful than they were forty years ago. In the 60s, one-third of all workers were woman. Now half are. Almost forty percent of women are the primary breadwinners or are contributing substantial income for the household budget. And according to a Mediamark Research & Intelligence survey, women make 75 percent of the buying decisions in the home. You know the telemarketer who asked for the decision-maker of the house? Apparently it's the wife.

Women's power extends to the academic world, as well. Author Nancy Gibbs explains in "Time" that half of Ivy League presidents are women, and the female dropout rate has been cut in half since the 70s. Also, the ratio of 60-40 of men and women on college campuses has reversed. Moreover, half of all law and medical degrees go to women.

But they are stressed, anxious, and not as happy.

Why?

According to the poll results, both men and women say that the government and businesses haven't adjusted to the revolution and need to do more to help families manage it all. For example, fifty-four percent of women and forty-nine percent of men say businesses need to be more flexible with work hours and schedules; they also agreed that companies need to give more paid time off, better or more day-care options, and longer school days or longer school years.

But are women really less happy than they were back in the day we wore pearls with our aprons and greeted Dad at the door when he arrived home from work, the turkey roasting in the oven?

Gibbs writes, "It may be that women have become more honest with the same pressures and conflicts that once accounted for greater male unhappiness. Or that modern life in a global economy is simply more stressful for everyone but especially for women, who are working longer hours while playing quarterback at home."

I think she nailed it there. It's comparable to therapy. Before you sit yourself on that couch, you think have a few problems, but you're not sure what they are. Then the therapist starts prodding you, and yikes! You got yourselves a lot of bloody problems.

From my perspective, I do think I have a more fulfilling life in that I have to use my head for more things than figuring out why the Bendaroos we ordered from the infomercial suck in comparison to what they promised us. But my job does bring a considerable amount of stress. So I'm happier in one sense, and much more anxious and stress in another. Like Gibbs says, I am probably experiencing the male stress--the pressure of transforming ideas and brain power into cash to buy dinner--that many women just simply didn't experience thirty or forty years ago.

This is the part in a post that I usually say something that makes you feel better. Like, oh but it's going to get easier next month.

I don't have any answers. But I'm glad someone at least asked the question because now I know I'm not alone in feeling like I'm one lousy juggler.

***

Originally published on Beyond Blue at Beliefnet.com. To read more of Therese, visit her blog, Beyond Blue at Beliefnet.com, or subscribe here. You may also find her at www.thereseborchard.com.

 

 

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Comments

[ColumbiaPatricia]

The main problem I have with happiness now v. happiness in the past is that I am certain that women in the past would put on a "happy face" no matter their circumstances. Where these women interviewed in their homes with their husbands or family present? Were they assured that their identity would not be revealed? I highly doubt that 40 years ago women would have been treated with that much respect. I consider the past survey of women's happiness to be flawed and therefore not worthy of comparison.

[flowergurlie]

This post has come at a perfect time for me. I am married, work full time and have 2 small children. I am constantly stressed and wondering how we're supposed to pull this off. There has to be an easier way. It's nice to know that I'm not the only lousy juggler out there.

[bthechangeyouseek]

This is a good perspective compared to previous articles. Thank you.

[clruane]

I know you mean well Theresa and I do like reading your articles but .......I have to check you on your recent post regarding the state of the American Woman. I come from the baby boom generation having been born in 1948. Guess that now makes me part of the older generation :-) You wrote that many women didn't experience the pressures of transforming ideas and brain power into cash to buy dinner thirty or forth years ago. I have to respectfully disagree as I grew up with my four brothers in a household headed by my single working Mom. I entered my young womanhood thinking that is what all women did..... that is, work at a job to earn a livelihood and then come home to care for a family too. The "male stress' you refer to seems to me like just daily living and quite frankly.... nothing new. It was a way of life thirty or forty years ago just as it is today!

[Philip N. Cohen - Huffpost Blogger]

Thanks for the post. When men are married, they are less likely to commit suicide, but that is not true for women. So marriage protects men. In other ways, marriage protects women (like health insurance). Some stresses result from conflicting sources of dependence and independence, and conflicting interests within families. Recently posted on this on the family inequality blog: http://www.familyinequality.com.

[Maya68]

The reasons ,to me, for the stress are:
1 - An inability for most of us to understand what we really need as opposed to what we want and then killing ourselves to work for the wants. This applies to all of us, male or female.
2 - From the above, over emphasis on the "Jones next door" combined with smart advertising that fools us into those wants.
3 - So much PCing or fear or wariness of others that many of us are plain lonely for a solid social network.
Of course, the above points also don't give us too much time for it.
4 - Without the social network or family to help out, childcare, housework etc are just more stressful.
A lot of other cultures are better with the 3rd and 4th points but they're probably catching up with on the first two and soon it'll be the same everywhere .......

[reader1]

Why is it that in other countries that this is not a problem. The joke is being played on the American people. We work harder, produce more and get less in return. Big business is running our country and our elected officials. Until that changes, we will have anxiety. No changes.

[singermuse]

Thank you! excellent reply. This is a good article but I would point out that while more women are now in the workforce it doesn't mean they're doing better or being more successful. Corporations are hiring more women BECAUSE they earn less than men and it helps their bottom line. This is not an improvement, it is further evidence of "the race to the bottom" in wages both men and women. In other countries of the "first world" industrialized nations, they are trying to follow suit. In France, one of the best countries in the world for a woman to live and work (free childcare, education, HEALTH CARE) they have been trying to increase the work week hours (the French work a 35 hour week with an average 4 weeks paid vacation every year) much to the uproar and outrage of the people who know they have it good. Generally French, German, Canadian, Dutch, Danish, Swedish women are much happier than Women in the United States. Hmm, is there a connection?

[MissAngela]

I like this article better than the one a week or so ago with a similar topic - the state of modern women in the workforce and happiness compared to 50 or 60 years ago.

I think things are slowly but surely changing for the better. It still grinds my gears that women aren't paid equally for equal work, and that most places don't have paternity leave laws, or in some cases, even maternity leave. It seems to me that women aren't paid as well because they're expected to up and leave when a child is born, and men are short changed because they are expected to take a backseat in parenting.
All and all I agree with the article saying we need more time off, greater access to day care and the like - these things would greatly improve life for men and women.