09/07/2011 09:17 pm ET | Updated Nov 07, 2011

But Mitt, I Don't Own One of Those Do-Hickeys

I received an email today from Zac Moffatt, Mitt Romney's Digital Director. Zac's a good guy, taking time out as he did to send me an email informing me that Mitt's plan for economic growth is available for free! Zac must know that I, a lifelong lefty, am struggling with myself a bit over having any interest in the Romney campaign in the first place. He must know that for people like me, it's not just that Mitt's drop-dead handsome, which he is, it's that he represents my interests at least as much as a guy who publicly sounds the oratorical chords of liberal tradition, but privately plays golf with John Boehner. In reaching out to me, the Mitt Romney people are by-passing the low-hanging fruit and going for that most difficult of swing voters, the kind that would cast a vote for a GOP candidate only in the desperate hope that anyone, party notwithstanding, might really be better than the status quo.

I'm a long way from sold on Mitt Romney, but the fact that I'd even consider him speaks to a level of disgust I've not felt since my wife made me watch an Extreme Pet Hoarding marathon on the girl channel.

So I clicked on the link Zac embedded in his email and it took me to a site where, sure enough, one can get a totally free copy of Believe in America: Mitt Romney's Plan for Jobs and Economic Growth, provided, that is, one owns a thing called a Kindle, which, I'm told, is some thingamajig people own instead of books.

I really, really, really wanted to learn about Mitt's plan. In fact, at the moment I'm interested in two Mitt Romney issues more than any other: 1) How will he get people employed and 2) Who does his hair?

But alas, I'm just a lowly blogger. I don't own a Kindle because in lieu of 139-dollar toys, I own books, used ones, and I'm thinking of reselling some of them just to pay the internet bill.

I wrote back to Zac to ask why he can't just pdf the plan and stick it up on some website so that anyone on the good side of the digital divide can read it, rather than just those people who have the money and inclination to buy and use costly gadgets. Granted, making it available online wouldn't get the plan to quite everybody, but it'd reach a damn site more folks than just those who buy everything they read about in Pretentious Twit Monthly.

Haven't heard back yet. I reckon being Mitt Romney's Digital Director makes one busy as a one-armed lettuce picker. But I'm sure Zac will touch base sooner or later. If there's anything you'd like me to pass along, leave me a comment and I'll make sure he hears it.