Kids Get Colored: Highlights Go To New Lows

Trend Alert! Pre-teens (tweens?) are getting their hair did. Yup, you heard me. The 9 year old down the street is getting high-lights and low-lights and chemical straightening. What is this world coming to?

I remember way back in 1995 (ha! mock me now), when I was 12, and all the cool girls were doing the "temporary" hair dye home kit thing. You know, strawberry blonde for four weeks, auburn for 6. (For some reason, red was always a hot color.) At $12 a pop, it was a cheap, easy, and an entirely reversible way to get that pre-teen rebellion itch scratched.

Except for me. It was the hey-day of Manic Panic and I was severely uncool. Nope, there was no way, no how that my mother was letting "low-class" hair dye within a mile of my beautiful, blonde tresses (her words, not mine.) And so I suffered, all natural, all boring, all through my elementary, junior-, and high-school career.

Ready for me to quit the pity party yet? Good, because I am. So I wasn't allowed to dye my hair. So, what? Yeah, I huffed and I puffed and I hid in my room watching back to back episodes of My So-Called Life, but I survived.

So, what I can't understand is why these parents are indulging these utterly superficial and unnecessary requests. Is this one of those, "I'm so busy as it is, if the only time I can spend un-conflicted time with my daughter is at the hair salon, then so be it" things? Word to the wise, there is no such thing as "un-conflicted" mother-daughter time, and there is nothing wrong with that.

And to be honest, as much as I fought tooth and nail to be able to dye my hair, I am now utterly thankful I didn't. I made it all through college, and even two years out without touching the chemical color. I had no roots, no split ends, need to put aside the $150 every 6 weeks it costs to keep up the oh-so-popular bergdorf blonde. And when I finally bit the bullet (because the musty Manhattan air had sucked all the life out of my color), I stressed over and over and over again to my hairdresser that I wanted it to look natural. Because you know what? Natural is in, and it also saves you money.

Why-oh-why are these parents so irresponsibly instilling in their daughters the idea that their appearance is improvable? That they will look better, cooler, prettier when they finally get their chunky highlights and edgy cuts? Every twelve-year-old since the dawn of time feels awkward and uncool and utterly unnoticeable, so why would any parent go out of their way and out of their pocket to reaffirm these notions? These girls won't lose their friends because they don't have purple streaks, and if they do, they shouldn't have had those friends in the first place.

I've already told Kate Hudson to stand up for her hair, and I've announced that frizzy is the new fabulous, and so this is my call to arms. In an age where Suri Cruise's haircut (as fabulous as it is) probably cost more than my cable, cellphone, and utility bill combined (and I live in Manhattan), we need to stop somewhere.

So, parents, leave your children's hair alone. Put the money in a college fund, and step away from the blowdryer. They've got the rest of their adult life to be judged by their hair, so don't start now.

And I promise, they'll get over it -- I did. And you know what else? One day, they'll thank you for it.

Comments

[ailbhe]

I live in Ireland, in recent years it is becoming more common to see mothers sending their seven year old daughters to the beauty salon for fake tan and the hair salon for a dye in preparation for their first communion. The government had to pass a law banning under 18's using sunbeds as these bimbo mothers were sending their young kids in for a natural tan!

[rlehman]

I just sent this to my (almost) 12 year old daughter. Thanks.

[arsphidius]

My 13 year old daughter has the most beautiful auburn hair. If anyone suggests coloring or cutting it short (it hangs down to her waist) she is horrified. I have told her that there are people paying $100 or more to get hair exactly like hers. She is proud of her hair, as she should be. If only I could have that color (sigh).

[JamieFrevele]

I so feel that. When I was 15 (in 1995), all I wanted to do was put red Glints in my hair, which supposedly washed out after 6-8 shampoos (but everyone knew that if you left it on long enough, it stayed!). My mom and I had a *screaming* match in K-Mart over it. She did relent and we tried Natural Instincts two years later, but when that faded weird and I graduated, I went ahead and did the professional thing. But that was me driving myself to the salon and paying my own money, which is different than my mom taking my insecure little adolescent ass to the salon for a really expensive and temporary pick-me-up. (Which, by the way, still wouldn't have hidden my flat chest.) Stop the tween-dying insanity!

[acty]

I absolutely agree with you......stop the insanity tweens!! I do also have to say I think you should write about the same demographic ordering coffee at Starbucks!! I was at a Starbucks the other day and a 13 year old girl on her way to school ordered a "venti skinny double no foam cappucino"!! I was in shock. Hair- dye and caffeine for teenagers ? When did this happen and what happened to wash out dye and juice boxes. : )