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Vivian Norris Headshot

Texas Women: Stop Having Sex With Men Who Vote Against Your Best Interests

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"A sex strike, sometimes called a sex boycott, is a strike, a method of non-violent resistance in which one or multiple persons refrain from sex with their partner(s) to achieve certain goals. It is a form of temporary sexual abstinence. Sex strikes have been used to protest many issues, from water resources to employment equity." (Wikipedia)

In Kenya, when violence broke out after political elections a few years back, the women in Kenya stopped having sex with the men until the violence ended. Guess what? The men quit fighting one another. We've all been there, attracted to that man who does not mean well for us. We sure would not want our daughters dating or married to these kinds of guys who think they should decide what is best for women. How perfectly patriarchal, these Texas men trying to not hear what women want have shown themselves to be, but how incredibly out of touch with today's reality. Women of Texas, it's going to be a long hot summer -- make sure the men who do not deeply respect and support women feel it.

As a native Texan, and someone who has survived 100-plus-degree temperatures for many summers, I can tell you, this summer in Texas is surely going to be hotter than usual. Sultry, sweaty summers can be made much nicer when good old-fashioned sex is part of the picture. But women, take heed: Don't give in if your man, boyfriend, husband, toyboy is not voting for your best interests, your reproductive health -- do not sleep with that man! I don't care how cute or charming he is! I don't care if he is your husband of many years. Resist! Go swimming! Meditate!

Do not make him dinner, do not go fetch him a cold beer from the fridge, do not iron that shirt, hell, do not change that diaper... do not make his life a little nicer this summer if he does not "get it" and learn to respect women! Instead, volunteer some time for senators like Wendy Davis, go with a group of women to Austin and make your voices heard. Get on the computer and the social networks and organize.

Remember that you live in a state where it would not be unusual (and I have seen it) to see a bumper sticker on a pickup truck which reads, "My Wife Yes, My Dog Maybe, My Gun Never." Remember what happened last time when a Texas good ole boy governor took that patriarchy all the way to become President of the United States. Stop the damage now and take back Texas.

This may sound a bit extreme and some will say sex should not be used as a "weapon" but let's get real, this is Texas, and men in Texas who have not woken up and smelled the coffee simply do not deserve any loving. Houston has more strip clubs than libraries. You can buy a gun easier than you can get reproductive health care. There is still a virgin and whore fundamentalist mentality which is more dangerous to women as it often is also promoted by the women themselves. These women, like women who hurt other women everywhere by criticizing and judging them, need to wake up as well. Women hurting other women is suicidal. Women who play into the hand of patriarchy need to be shown the way out of that prison. Wendy Davis and Leticia Van De Putte and others are leading the way.

The real problem will actually be with those men who could care less because deep down they don't really like women. I don't mean not like them sexually, I mean they really do not respect nor listen to women. There is a breed of Texas male who simply does not hear women. Women's voices remind them of terrorists.

Let's look at the reality. In the Texas legislature the following has been heard:

Then state senator Leticia Van de Putte, a Democrat from San Antonio who had rushed back to the Texas Capitol from her father's funeral, asked to be recognized to speak. The Republican presiding officer at first ignored her. When she was finally given the floor for an inquiry, Van de Putte asked: "At what point must a female senator raise her hand or her voice to be recognized over the male colleagues in the room?"

Then there was this:

"The leadership may not want to listen to TX women, but they will have to listen to me," Davis tweeted before starting her filibuster.

Right now, around the country and even in the UK, Texas is being discussed:

There's a saying: "Texas is paradise for men and dogs, but hell for women and horses." That's a little outdated and not completely accurate: in fact, horses are treated pretty well here. Women in Texas have had a difficult time.

For two decades, since Ann Richards was governor, Texas politics has been dominated by a small group of mostly Anglo-Republican men, elected by a few hundred thousand GOP primary voters.

Texas isn't as deeply red as many people think. Beneath the Republican dominance is a diverse, urban state with a openly lesbian mayor in its largest city (Houston).

The New Texas -- urban, young, increasingly diverse, progressive - made itself heard this week. Suddenly the side of Texas that the rest of the world rarely sees was thrust into the spotlight. It's the side of Texas that gives Texas Democrats hope.

Oh, and before you fall for that guy who seems to be a pro-women's choice Democrat, and spend the summer with him, step back and take a real look at the man. Do his words meet his actions? Does he say one thing with you, but with the boys does he become yet another good ole boy? Does he truly respect women, not just his Mama? Teach your daughters and sons that women do not have to live this way under this kind of patriarchy. In Texas it is hard won, but we will win.

Women business owners and leaders in Texas communities have fought long, hard battles to have a say in the way they live their lives, run their businesses and have their voices heard. Ironically, as the right of center folks fear a rise in Islam and Sharia law I say, take a look at Texas where the men still run the show in most places. But that is changing. And women are starting and running more and more businesses, getting elected to office, weilding more and more economic power, and speaking out. They will not be silenced.

But many aspects of being a woman, surviving and succeeding as a woman and especially as a single mother in Texas today, have become harder than they were in the 1970s. Imagine how difficult and how expensive it would be for a single mom in Texas today to make it all the way through law school with no health care, little funding for education and no access to child care. Then there is a trend of disturbing redistricting which affects both women and minorities (who are now becoming a majority) and is a way for the good ole boys to hang onto power. Women like Wendy Davis would have a heck of a time pulling themselves out of poverty as a single mom, finding affordable child care and paying for a higher education in Texas these days. She is fighting for all women because she knows from personal experience how difficult it is, and how if this patriarchy continues to abuse its power, women will continue to be silenced.

The GOP will threaten and they will use silence and fear against anyone who challenges what is an outdated and unhealthy and dangerous system which abuses power against more than half of the citizens of Texas. We must not let them win this battle.

From what I recall from those hot summers in Texas, the hotter the summer, the greater the chance of powerful hurricanes in August and September. The winds of change are coming to Texas. Nothing can stop them.