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Vivian Norris

Vivian Norris

Posted: October 6, 2009 01:03 PM

Last March, Dr. Drew Pinsky wrote about "Narcissism and the Economic Crisis?" for the Huffington Post.

And I think it is time to look even more deeply into this disturbing trend. There are simply more and more narcissists than there were a few decades ago. There is less community and more selfishness. And this will affect how quickly we come out of this financial crisis, as well as how. When the narcissist is confronted with harsh, unpleasant and unflattering realities or relationships, he or she flees them. And there are most definitely some American high rollers who have stashes of cash (and all those offshore no tax bank accounts being looked into at the moment) and are ready to move on to kinder countries as the dollar falls into the abyss and the huge, superficial profits dry up. They trade in the old for a new younger model and leave. But what about when the narcissist has nowhere left to go? In other words, when America and other places that are suffering from the past excesses, are stuck with themselves, the healthy sane folks get to work at making their communities (or what is left of them) better places to live. While those with unhealthy narcissistic tendencies follow the money to places where their grandiosity remains intact. And they can leave havoc in their wakes (Ponzi schemes which fall apart, pensioners, wives and children left to clean up the mess).

When a narcissist hits a wall, that's when it becomes really ugly. Narcissists are poor losers. They are the ones who either turn over the Monopoly board when they are behind, or, what tends to be more common these days, when confronted with a mirror which shows them their true selves, they become silent, and walk away. They deny and negate those people and situations which do not supply them with narcissistic supply and go looking for new victims. In other words, most of them are vampires. And they leave people with debt, empty bank accounts, broken hearts and not even turn around to look back. Entire lives, marriages and businesses have been built around this kind of emptiness, and when the bubble is shown to be hollow, the narcissist is usually already long gone.

No wonder vampire films, books and television series have become increasingly popular in America ... we are living surrounded by narcissistic financial and emotional vampires. In fact, these people were considered to be "successful" "role models" with lifestyles people aspired to even though nothing they did or said or "felt" was sustainable. Hey, some of them even committed horrible crimes, and were defended publicly by their fellow narcissists when they fled the "reality" of the crime scene. The society which has grown up around the economy of distracting America and the rest of the world from reality (video games, Facebook, cinemas, bowling alleys, sports related everything ...) all of the sudden benefits, as people at first try to deny the reality of the difficult situation, but later, as that same economy sucks from them like vampires, they wake up to the harsh light of day. The projector is turned off and the images of what could be now appear to be simply plays of shadow and light.

The hard lesson to learn is simply this: Avoid Vampires and anything that resembles them as they are too good to be true and turn into nightmares. They never cared about you and never will. Madoff not only cheated his investors, he cheated his wife. And unless you want to write a book about it or create another TV series, leave the vampires out in the cold, alone with themselves, or better yet, in prison, where they belong.

 

Follow Vivian Norris on Twitter: www.twitter.com/vivigive

Last March, Dr. Drew Pinsky wrote about "Narcissism and the Economic Crisis?" for the Huffington Post. And I think it is time to look even more deeply into this disturbing trend. There are simply m...
Last March, Dr. Drew Pinsky wrote about "Narcissism and the Economic Crisis?" for the Huffington Post. And I think it is time to look even more deeply into this disturbing trend. There are simply m...
 
 
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HUFFPOST SUPER USER
CroatianCritter
is keeping people honest
02:59 PM on 10/12/2009
Thank you! Liberals are just like conservatives in that they believe the lies that they want to not realizing that their corporate media has been deceiving them the whole time. Here is another example of a blogger above who has no idea what he is talking about.
01:25 PM on 10/07/2009
"A corporation in and of itself does not have any power over individuals."

Okay, what about the millions of people who work for corporations or the hundreds of Congressmen and Senators who are supposed to represent us the real breathing people of the US of A or the millions of people who are manipulated by lies and distortion spread by the corporate media, including defenseless children and semi-literate or completely illiterate people who are unable to penetrate the fog of BS generated by the likes of corporate clowns like Glenn Beck, Rush Hairball and Bill O.? I could go on.

Right, corporations are weak little fluff balls that need to be protected from the mean people. Right. I mean far right.
Bladernr1001
Vote Libertarian
06:31 PM on 10/07/2009
comment con't....

- You castigate Glenn Beck, O'Reilly and his ilk? What about the daily lies, spin and general obfuscation that politicians spew? If not for guys like these in the media....we would not know the half of what our government is doing to screw us over....we probably still do not know the half of it even with these guys.
Bladernr1001
Vote Libertarian
06:32 PM on 10/07/2009
I am assuming that you are responding to an earlier post of mine. Let's take some of your statements one by one.

- Yes many people work for large corporations. However, they are not required to stay at any given company. They are free to seek other employment any time they want to. And if fact many do just that....and usually get a nice raise when they do......so not much power there.

- I am as disturbed as you seem to be that our elected representatives tend to cater to those who contribute to their campaign coffers over the voters at large. However, not just corporations peddle this kind of influence. Lawyers contribute a great deal to government officials, so do groups like ACORN and public employee unions are actually larger contributors than corporations now a days. Do you think these folks have the greater common good in mind any more than you think corps do? If you do I would consider you very naive. State and local governments also are subjected to influence peddling and they in turn lobby higher levels of government.

- Illiterate people? I don't think people that cannot even read or write would do good in any system that man could devise.....straw man argument IMHO.
01:18 PM on 10/07/2009
Does conservatism cause Narcissism,

or do narcissists become conservatives?
Bladernr1001
Vote Libertarian
06:59 PM on 10/07/2009
What about our Narcissist-in-Chief.....Obama? Not to come down on him too harshly because I think you have to be something of a narcissist to be an actor or a politician (I mean, what is the difference anyway?).

The real issue between the warring political factions boils down to how much individual freedom should each person be entitled to?

Liberals never see individual initiative as a benefit to society....conservatives do. Along these lines I always like to ask....who enriched more people's lives in a positive manner?....Bill Gates or Mother Teresa? Bill Gates built a company that enabled thousands of people to make a good living in good jobs (as have many entrepreneurs)...MT attended to those with unfortunate disabilities or other difficulties in life.

It all depends on your overall outlook but I would venture to say that each type of person is vital in our society. BG was motivated by wealth.....MT was motivated by the good feeling you get from helping someone...maybe even the notoriety she eventually received. The point is...is it really important what the motivation was if good is done in the end?

All of us contribute to this just by going to work every day. Our jobs and businesses are a benefit to someone else...how do we know this. They purchase our products and services.....why would they do this if they did not see some kind of benefit from doing so?
01:13 PM on 10/08/2009
Obama and the DLC are conservatives, Corporatist. look it up.

Modern conservatism was formed to fight the Enlightenment and the French revolution.

Conservatism hate democracy, the middle class, and individual, the "mob" they call them.

Conservatives love plutocracy.
HUFFPOST SUPER USER
ndem
07:35 AM on 10/07/2009
The most disturbing part of this is that possible solutions which can be sustainable, need less narcissism, and more cooperative effort and empathy for one another, our planet, etc etc...ironically narcissists can, at times, LIKE being caught, going to prison, becoming terminally ill...why? Because at last they are at "peace", and not expected to participate in human anything...and even sometimes have people feeling sorry for them. Look at how some manipulative "masters" are able to turn it around and show themselves to be "victims"...
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HUFFPOST SUPER USER
Rogan
07:49 AM on 10/07/2009
...I've always thought that part of the reason people who are described above as narcissists (including my poor creepy mother), behave in such cruel and immature and selfish ways, is simple laziness. It's just harder work, to be a part of society, or your family, or workplace, in a POSITIVE sense.
02:40 PM on 10/07/2009
Highly untrue, and offensive to genuinely lazy people. Ok all kidding aside, I think it's more than being lazy, I think it's more of a sense of entitlement therefore giving you the right to be lazy in the eyes of others.
06:23 AM on 10/07/2009
Forgive me for copying XCITIZEN,
HoweverNarcissism is like knowing a living death,- the only way to truly be safe from a Narcissist is to shield yourself from their abuse, and to escape.

Read more at: http://www.huffingtonpost.com/vivian-norris-de-montaigu/the-narcissistic-ego-and_b_311188.html it is true
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05:53 AM on 10/07/2009
It is no Measure of health to be well adjusted to a profoundly sic society.....krishnamurti
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05:50 AM on 10/07/2009
The poster "entitlement " touched on it! Advertising. but more insidious is that the advertising prayed on peoples fears and invented and enhanced them. on top of that you have dishonesty basically undisguised now in every walk of life. a culture of manipulation has grown up around this.
fear and dishonesty divides people. they become situational narcissist due to mistrusting every one else around them. plus you have a government that uses fear tactic to sell wars witch in turn breads more fear. the more fear the more people will horde and take care of only themselves!
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Entitlement
PaddyO, Aspiring Keeper of the
12:28 AM on 10/07/2009
"Have it your way."
"The customer is always right."
"Just do it."
"My Space."
"The Me Generation."
"The iPhone, iReport, iEverything."
"The customer comes first."
"One God."
HUFFPOST SUPER USER
Balzac
05:22 AM on 10/08/2009
Narcissists naturally have a strong relationship with "God".
HUFFPOST SUPER USER
Balzac
12:15 AM on 10/07/2009
I agree that most people should tone it down. However, there are the chosen ones among the many whose primordial narcissism is a gift to humanity. Others should yield so that egos such as these may grow.
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01:24 AM on 10/07/2009
If you light the fuse, you're obligated to throw the bomb. All you have demonstrated here is idea interruptus - let's see it developed...
10:18 PM on 10/06/2009
Final comment: This narcissism is exactly like Chinese society. I wonder if as a result of global cultural mixing, the American character is becoming more like Chinese character? At what point do social norms act like a virus, and transmit themselves from one society to another?
12:11 AM on 10/07/2009
Narcissism in the Western world is a disorder of the Western personality.
10:16 PM on 10/06/2009
This author has nailed the problem. I notice this in the professional world all the time. The sheer volume of vile, selfish behavior is incredible. Nobody has even the most common courtesy. Everbody, from top to bottom of the organization, is all backstabbing, all the time.

Everybody has lost their money and are afraid of losing their jobs. They are more than happy to throw their (former) friends under the bus to save themselves.

Avoid Vampires? Ha. Can't be done. They are everyone.
02:07 AM on 10/07/2009
Alice: "But I don't want to go among mad people."
Cheshire Cat: "Oh you can't help that."
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HUFFPOST SUPER USER
Ganapati
Don't you mess with my Wheel
09:04 PM on 10/06/2009
Well, this is America right?
What do you expect from a society that cultivates individuality as an unquestionable principle?
Where do you think it will end up.
Sometimes evil is only realized in the outcome of things...
11:02 AM on 10/07/2009
A very important point. It's not that there are per capita more narcissists (sociopaths) in America than elsewhere. It's that the reigning American ideology offers the perfect conditions for them to flourish, the American way of life fosters their style, does not set up obstacles to them (i.e. to protect their likely victims) but instead encourages them. American society was open, narcissists got in and retooled it for their own benefit. Thus they are at the top of every field. Not that everyone at the top is a narcissist, just an awfully high percentage. For example, in most other societies, there are social consequences for lying, cheating, total BS, or going back on your word. Here it's rare that you DON'T get away with it. You just make up some new BS, or at worst you leave for the Caribbean.
02:55 PM on 10/07/2009
I'd recommend reading "The Sociopath next door," I think you would enjoy it.
HUFFPOST SUPER USER
CroatianCritter
is keeping people honest
08:56 PM on 10/06/2009
Three comments to add to this! I think Americans have been duped by our media and leaders. We allow the media to tell us that this is "The Greatest Nation on Earth" and when something as simple as a homeless doll gets created, the media rises up to try to protect us from the decline of our supposedly great empire by protecting us from any form of cold reality. Positive thinkers also create problems because in their quest to see everything from a positive light, they become increasingly naive (I have this problem on this website a lot). They are unable to process factual information as it creates a distortion of their current worldview. What the United States really needs is some REALITY. Maybe this will help us figure out what is truly wrong with our culture and get us thinking about the proper direction to fix these issues.

P.S. Death to the Conservative movement (Minus Ron Paul)! These guys have lied to us so much, their lies have become our reality.
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01:27 AM on 10/07/2009
Why does Paul get a pass? He's as big a liar as anyone - remember his predictions of "race wars" as a consequence of Great Society social programs? They're in his old newsletters - under his byline. Now he denies ever having written them, or any knowledge of them...
02:56 PM on 10/07/2009
Oh you mean the newsletter that was written by an aide, which was retracted within a week of publication?
11:04 AM on 10/07/2009
"Positive thinkers also create problems because in their quest to see everything from a positive light, they become increasingly naive (I have this problem on this website a lot). They are unable to process factual information as it creates a distortion of their current worldview."

Absolutely right! I have long thought that somebody should write a book on THE POWER OF NEGATIVE THINKING.
08:51 PM on 10/06/2009
Sam Vakinin has nailed the whole psychological framework of Narcissism, Google Narcissism, Vampire, and Vaknin, and you'll find a plethora of very fascinating and useful theory and analysis of Narcissistic Personality Disorder.
08:38 PM on 10/06/2009
To really grasp this personality disorder, which is epidemic in our culture, read: Sam Vaknin, the ultimate source for understanding narcissism:

The Narcissist as Vampire or Machine
http://health.groups.yahoo.com/group/narcissisticabuse/message/4944

Sam Vaknin:
http://samvak.tripod.com/

The Health Insurance Industry in America is an example of Corporate Vampirism, run by narcissists, ruining the lives of its victims, discarding them, and moving on to fresh blood.

NOW IS THE TIME TO START A REAL, POPULIST MOVEMENT TO SHUT DOWN THE VAMPIRE HEALTH INSURANCE INDUSTRY.