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Will Aguila, M.D.

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Don't Let Your (Facebook) Friends See You Sweat

Posted: 08/15/11 09:16 AM ET

Thinking about posting your weight loss goals and updates on Facebook? What a great idea. You can instantly give yourself some virtual accountability. You can keep a daily journal that tracks your weight loss triumphs and setbacks. Seems like a no brainer, right? Wrong! Be careful, "caveat emptor" (let the buyer beware), you could be setting yourself up for failure ... and a very public one at that.

When we take a closer look at how weight gain and obesity work, we start to understand why the "Facebook Diet" may not be such a great idea. Obesity is a cycle that occurs when we allow ourselves to medicate our feelings of anxiety and depression with food. We learn to overeat to soothe our emotions and eventually, a certain degree of guilt develops -- especially if we are gaining weight. As this guilt increases, it adds to the anxiety and depression that we already experience and makes us overeat even more; creating a cycle. The cycle starts with anxiety, but the steam engine that keeps it running is guilt.

Now consider the pressure that you put yourself under by broadcasting your goals to hundreds of your Facebook friends. If your progress is less than stellar, you may feel that the "eyes of the world are looking upon you." This feeling -- whether it's substantiated or not -- increases your feelings of failure. It will fuel the obesity cycle by maximizing your stress, anxiety and guilt, which will in-turn, lead back to overeating.

So instead of creating a healthy measure of accountability for yourself, you've actually made matters worse. With every rotation of the cycle the guilt increases more and more. You're now in danger of spiraling out of control. This is an example of why, when people fail a diet, they gain back all the weight they lost and then some!

Now, consider the possibility of sabotage. Sabotage in weight loss occurs in many forms and the fact that you wish to have others hold you accountable for your own weight loss is a reflection of your past experiences with self-sabotage.

Another form of sabotage which can be just as harmful is "friendly fire." Friendly fire can occur by well-intentioned family members or friends who believe you may be losing too much weight or that you're not eating enough. Such sabotage is not intentional and should not be viewed as deliberate, but it may harm you nonetheless. Critique from beloved family members and friends -- especially if consistent -- can lead to an inevitable downfall if you're not prepared for this type of disparagement.

Now, consider the flip side of that coin, the "hostile takeover." This type of attack comes from so-called friends and co-workers that may take a certain amount of delight in your downfall. They may be totally upfront about their attack, criticizing you openly in the social media platform. Or, they may be ninja about it, not making any mention whatsoever of your progress, even when it is undeniably obvious. Such tactics may be meant to crumble the foundations of your efforts for their own amusement -- and Facebook puts it all on display.

Therefore, posting a regular journal via social media may cause your weight loss struggle to become a "gladiator sport" and the whole Facebook nation is sitting in the Coliseum cheering your success or hoping for your failure.

I suggest that rather than commit to your friends, you commit to yourself, because after all, this is for you. Minimizing stress, anxiety and guilt breaks the cycle of obesity. If you want to avoid criticism and sabotage so that you can optimize your chances for success, keep your daily diet details out of the public spotlight. Let the results speak for themselves.

It's your body and no one else's. The contract that you make with yourself is more valid than anything that you can promise to others. You have what it takes in you to do this! I know, I did it myself. Listen to your inner voice and trust it. If you need to share your plans with someone, then share them only with the people who are closest to you and who will be champions for your cause.

Do what it takes, but don't be disappointed if you fall. Get up and try again. But above all, beat the cycle!

 
Thinking about posting your weight loss goals and updates on Facebook? What a great idea. You can instantly give yourself some virtual accountability. You can keep a daily journal that tracks your we...
Thinking about posting your weight loss goals and updates on Facebook? What a great idea. You can instantly give yourself some virtual accountability. You can keep a daily journal that tracks your we...
 
 
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07:00 PM on 10/12/2011
I completely disagreee! I blog about my weight loss journey ( www.theweightsover.net ) and post new posts on Facebook. I've had nothing but support which I needed! It totally keeps me accountable to MYSELF, not to others. I am doing this for myself, and telling my story to perhaps inspire others needing a nudge. And I've had those emails, the ones who joined MyFitnessPal to do it with me, those who come to the gym with me. There is NO reason that trying to lose weight has to be done alone. I certainly gained a lot of this weight hanging out with my friends, and I'll lose it hanging out with them, as well. I love exchanging recipes, exercise routines, and just "great job!" with my friends.
11:31 AM on 09/25/2011
This article makes a good point when they say everyone will see your progress and see if you fail. I think this gives you more of a reason to succeed. Your friends on Facebook are just that, your friends. They should support you in your success and help you through your possible fails. I think Facebook is a great way to help others with dieting success and if you by chance fail get help and stay motivated. I'm part of a collection of friends on Facebook who help each other with weight loss. www.hcgplan.net
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John Di Saia
An Opinionated Plastic Surgeon in the OC
10:54 PM on 09/20/2011
Facebook is about sitting on your duff not moving it at the gym.
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orbo
Moving Forward!
04:37 PM on 08/16/2011
Be careful now, Facebook can be fattening too for people wasting their whole day snacking while on Facebook!
04:03 PM on 08/16/2011
I like that the article's photo reads: Facebook helps you con the people in your life.
03:49 PM on 08/16/2011
I disagree with this article. I started my blog http://poundstomiles.com/ so that I could have the accountability of whoever would listen. Somebody mentioned earlier the motivation behind the "accountability" has not been considered in your article or the quality of friends. Albeit that my blog puts me out there away from just my positive normal support group but me personally I'm okay with that. Not only am I using my for accountability but to maybe help and inspire someone else. I realize your article is of your opinion but I just can't jump on board with you.
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Cassandra L Chapa
09:30 AM on 08/16/2011
Just look at the people on Bodybuilding.com... hundreds if not thousands of success stories and all because they put their progress on a social network. Accountability is a big part of completing the goal.
08:52 PM on 08/15/2011
Wow, FB can do anything!!!!
12:21 PM on 08/15/2011
Hmm... this doesn't take other factors into account: the motivation behind the lifestyle change, the nutritional plan and exercise routine that's being used, the support system outside of something like Facebook, and the quality of friends and support of those on Facebook... from how the author writes, it sounds like he doesn't really have any good ones online!

This also doesn't mention the greater odds of success that people have when they dedicate themselves to tracking their goals and progress, Facebook or not. We live in a social world, and will interact with people whether it's online or in person, so either way, we will be held accountable for our lifestyle changes. This author mentions all the negatives, all the "what-ifs" centering around anxiety and failure... but what if you were posting the recipes you've discovered that taste wonderful and make you feel great, or the new exercise routine that you can accomplish now, or any of the other benefits you're experiencing from these new changes? Consider, too, that social networking can provide you with a chance to learn about other successful tricks and habits that you may not have found any other way, and it may even come with your friends' endorsements. "This technique worked for me, give that a try!" "I work out here, maybe you can join and we'll be workout buddies!"

Yes, negativity spirals... but so does positivity. You're lifestyle changes displayed on Facebook could motivate countless others!
12:15 PM on 08/15/2011
I always cringe when a dieter says they are going to start posting their weight, or photos of everything they put into their mouths on social media. If you cannot be honest to your self you will not suddenly be made honest by public accountability. It may work for a short brief period but then that day will come when you slip and cannot deal with the comments or admission of what you are doing and you lie or drop the topic and move on to posting about what your dog is doing. It is only after successfully maintaining a 200+ pounds weight loss for several years that I felt comfortable sharing and discussing it in the social media outlets.

Jane Cartelli
Keepingthepoundsoff.com
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Jenna Bean
Stop Child Abuse!
10:51 AM on 08/15/2011
Weird because when my friend Fran did this it actually motivated her from walking to jogging to running and now she has lost 50 pounds, is down to about a size 6, and has done nothing but improve b/c of all the support.

It depends on your friends I suppose, surround yourself with positive people, you'll get positive results?
10:42 AM on 08/15/2011
Using Facebook has helped many of my friends. Maybe not in the way explained here, but having friends to ask questions and support is something every dieter needs. I have a site that teaches people about the hcg diet. I integrate Facebook with my site and it not only has helped my users but has helped me find what fellow dieters are looking for and what to post on my site. www.hcgplan.net