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7 Things People With Emotional Toughness Do Differently

06/18/2015 09:44 am ET | Updated Jun 18, 2016
Inti St. Clair via Getty Images

By Nicole Weaver for YourTango

Not all of us are naturally strong. Some have anxiety or are insecure, which easily puts cracks in your armor. So, how do you toughen up to gain the utmost confidence? Here are seven ways to mentally toughen you up!

1. They take control.

There are two types of people in the world: Those who believe in fate, and those who believe they have control over things. According to Inc, you should be the latter; stop worrying about things that happen to you and start making things happen for you.


2. They're flexible.

Life doesn't always go as planned so it's better to be able to pivot when you need to! According to Forbes, being flexible means you're open to the unexpected and won't crumble when something inevitably changes.

3. They learn from their mistakes.

You can either choose to crumble from your mistakes, or make them tools for your future. Look at those slip ups as training and refrain from letting them define you. According to Inc, looking at your these moments as training will toughen you up.

4. They create specific goals -- then conquer them.

Sometimes you're mentally all over the places because you have no direction. What are you doing? Why? When do you want to accomplish this? A Harvard study found students who set goals tend to earn twice as much than those who had no goals. So write down that goal then reap the benefits.

5. They look for acceptance from themselves, not others.

Most of us want other people to like us, but strength comes from within. Ironically, many people don't like you until you stop caring whether or not others like you. According to Inc, that kind of strength is admirable and your relationships become happier once you adopt that mindset.

6. They keep their stress in check.

Find out what helps you lower your stress level. Perhaps it's tea, maybe it's exercising, maybe it's just setting aside alone time. But a study from New York University found that stress makes it harder for people to control their emotions. Want to lower your risk of bursting into tears at work? Get rid of that stress.

7. They let the little things roll off their back.

Stop sweating the small stuff. According to Inc, Your mental strength is a finite supply, so don't wear yourself down. Although you should accept that you have control over your life, don't turn into a control freak.

This article originally appeared on YourTango.

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