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Zoey Gulmi Headshot

The 5 Dating Mistakes I Vowed to Avoid After Divorce

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You just polished off a pint of Haagen-Dazs. Your divorce papers are finally signed. And now you're wondering how to get your groove back.

Been there, done that, bought the t-shirt.

First things first, step away from the ice cream and listen to me closely: Despite what you've heard, there are some really amazing men out there. Promise.

Speaking from experience, one of the best things I did (after filing for divorce) was to make these 5 vows to myself before considering making new vows to someone else.

1) Take it slow. I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but the person who said, "The best way to get over someone is to get under someone else" was a dude looking to get laid. So go at your own pace (whatever that may be). Besides, you're worth the wait.

2) Leave the past in the past. This just in ladies: All guys are NOT like your ex. Trusting a new man can be difficult but punishing a good guy for a bad guy's mistakes is a definite no-no. If you're anything like me, you'll be pleasantly surprised with just how incredible of a man you can find.

3) Drama free is the way to be. You're going to want to go ahead and check the pity party at the door. Wallowing is no fun, for you or for the people around you. Allow yourself the time to heal and be happy on your own before you try to be happy with someone else.

4) Don't Settle. I don't know if you know this, but you're kind of a big deal. Now is not the time to set the bar low. This is your chance to begin again with someone who brings out the best in you, and you in them. Choose wisely.

5) No Playing Games. Ain't nobody got time for that. Authenticity is sexy. Whether you're looking for him to put a ring on it, a baby in it, or just want to be best buds, honesty is always the best policy. Just don't propose on the first date. The only response you'll be getting is "check please." Just sayin'.

Ready? Steady? Happy Dating!