So fresh in my mind is the awe-inspiring gluttony of Thursday, followed by a full 72 hours of unadulterated sloth, that I worry I'll soon become one of those people who needs to be removed from his one-bedroom apartment in a wheelbarrow, arm fat spilling over the sides. I vow to change my ways immediately.
Alcohol does funny things to us. This is essentially why we drink it. Many of these effects are positive; that said it is also unfortunately responsible for some near biblical lapses of judgment. This is because deep down inside all of us, in a place we don't like to talk about... there be monsters!