04/09/2009 05:12 am ET Updated May 25, 2011

Drew Barrymore On Rehab, Her Ex And Her Estranged Mom

Drew Barrymore is on the cover of W magazine's April issue and inside she gives a revealing interview on her new role, her mom, her ex, and rehab.

On feeling liberated to play the darker character of "Little Edie" Beale in Grey Gardens, airing in April on HBO ... "I was excited to bring my own pain to something. I mean, contrary to my happy-go-luckiness, I have so much darkness in there. Playing Edie, I felt like s---. I thought, I'm afraid beyond anything I've ever known. I'm miserable; I'm scared; I feel sick all the time. And I was like, Good! At least I have somewhere to put it. You know what? I'm not f---in' happy all the time. I like making people feel good, but it was great not to have to please anybody. I was out there for myself and for her."

On how isolating herself to prepare for THE dramatic role as "Little Edie" Beale reminded her of being in rehab as a kid... "I got institutionalized as a kid, and I felt like I was back there. A lot of times I found myself unhappy and isolated, and the only other time I felt that way was when I was in there. It was absolutely trying to relearn to live. You are learning to become someone else."

On her 5 year relationship with ex - boyfriend Fabrizio Moretti of the Strokes...
"One of the most, if not the most, important relationships I've had in my life. We're still very close. I'm just learning who I am and how relationships work and how to make them function. No different from anyone else."

On her relationship with her own mother being "the polar opposite" of a love story...
"My mother and I split ways when I was very young and have never really reconciled."

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