Illegal immigrants: can't live with them, can't put them on leashes, like human chattel. But at least one Republican candidate for the 3rd District Congressional primary in Iowa, birthplace of presidential primaries, wants to do something about this dilemma. By which I mean to say he wants to implant microchip tracking devices inside illegal aliens, because why not, right? Then we can all keep tabs on them with our android phones!
While speaking at a Tama County Republican forum, [GOP Primary contender Pat] Bertroche made it clear that he wasn't joking when he suggested treating undocumented immigrants like pets.
"I think we should catch 'em, we should document 'em, make sure we know where they are and where they are going," said Pat Bertroche, an Urbandale physician. "I actually support microchipping them. I can microchip my dog so I can find it. Why can't I microchip an illegal?
I don't know! Why can't you? Why can't you train your Pomeranian to pick seasonal fruits and vegetables, and staff Mitt Romney's Sanctuary Mansions?
Bertroche went on, "That's not a popular thing to say, but it's a lot cheaper than building a fence they can tunnel under." Oh, sure. Catching and chipping hundreds of thousands of people sounds unbelievably cost-effective, and not at all that sort of thing that a big, intrusive goverment would do.