02/14/2012 11:24 am ET

Celebrity Flirt Roulette: John Krasinski, Emmy Rossum And More Creepy Valentine's Day Messages (VIDEO)

During the last few weeks at "Conan," the show has been recording testimonials from various guests for a very special compilation. Testimonials for your love.

A dozen celebrities (mostly comedians) each recorded a short flirtation for this montage, which they call Celebrity Flirt Roulette. But the flirting is a little less smooth than the caliber you may expect from bigtime Hollywood celebrities. In fact, they're all pretty creepy.

From John Krasinski asking if he may have sex with you, to David Cross explaining that he is simply having a biological reaction to your cleavage, to Jenny Slate explaining that she'd want to have millions of babies with you if it didn't hurt so much to give birth, we have to commend these brave celebrities for being straightforward with the subtext of Valentine's Day.

Also, we declare the MVP of Celebrity Flirt Roulette to be Super Bowl correspondent extraordinaire Billy Eichner, who has the best line of the montage: "Do you think Taylor Swift's vagina smells like Fruit by the Foot?"