First up was Mitt Romney who, Lane thought, "should be strapped to the roof of a station wagon and driven cross-country to Canada."
How about Rick Santorum? To gales of laughter from the audience Nathan suggested Santorum be "sent on a two-week gay cruise with nothing but a speedo and a sweater vest."
He then joked that Santorum's sweater vest is the best contraception: when he wears it, "abstinence finds him."
Lane also came up with some surprising new post-politics careers for Newt Gingrich and Ron Paul.
Gingrich could be a Jenny Craig spokesperson, but only after going on a juice-only diet plan.
Whereas Paul, Lane mused, would just need to kept busy. "Perhaps there's an Elks Club in need of a bingo caller."
"Late Show With David Letterman" airs Weeknights at 11:35 p.m. EST on CBS.
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