04/05/2012 04:19 am ET

'Couples Therapy': Kasey Kahl Reveals Severe Childhood Abuse And Terror (VIDEO)

Kasey Kahl opened up about what was likely the worst year of his childhood on "Couples Therapy" (Wed., 9 p.m. ET on VH1). "The Bachelorette" alum went on the show with Vienna Girardi, who won "The Bachelor," but didn't keep that man. The two of them are in a relationship, but it's unhealthy and destructive in a lot of ways, and it looks like at least some of that stems back to a boyfriend his mother had.

"My mom had this boyfriend for about a year and he hated me," Kahl said. "he'd smack the s**t out of us, he would tease us, he would call us names, and he said if I ever told my mom, he'd beat the s**t out of me." Kahl went on to detail in more specific details the terrorizing things the man did to him.

But when Dr. Jenn Berman, the counselor, suggested that the man only wanted him to feel worthless, Kahl admitted that he still feels he was. "I was," he said. "I couldn't do anything. I couldn't even tell anybody."

That shame he feels about his own inability to act in his own defense is eating him up inside, and driving him to drink and his own violent outbursts. "Each time you are violent, each time you drink, each time you hate yourself, he f*****g wins," Berman said. "When you treat her badly, he wins. When you treat you badly, he wins."

It's a hard lesson to try and learn later in life, but a true one. The burdens of childhood can become crippling when carried into adulthood.

"Couples Therapy" continues for its celebrity participants every Wednesday at 9 p.m. ET on VH1.

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