11/02/2012 09:26 am ET

Getting Pregnant With Michelle Tea: How Babies Are Made When They're Made In Clinics

“Now, we’re using your eggs,” Dr. Waller points his pen at Dashiell. “Am I right?”

Dashiell nods. I feel that Dashiell is probably biting back a “Yes, sir.” Dashiell talks like someone from another era. He’s so polite, it’s like he’s fucking with you, but he’s not. Once a car almost hit us, and he yelped, “Criminy!”

“’Criminy?’” I repeated for blocks. It was more of a surprise than almost getting run down. “When your life flashes before your eyes, that is the word that just comes out? ‘Criminy?’” Dashiell could say nothing in her defense, just blush a charming shade of pink and smile.

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