11/30/2012 02:23 pm ET Updated Nov 30, 2012

The Best Pregnancy Advice I Never Got

If you are pregnant with your first child or trying to get pregnant with your first child -– I have a little gift for you. Think of it as the best baby gift you will ever receive, disguised as a 1000-word advice manifesto. Read it carefully and commit it to memory –- you’ll thank me later. There is one theme, and one theme only -– selfishness.

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